Summary Of P. M Forni's 'Choosing Civility'

Part one of Choosing Civility by P.M Forni is an interesting chunk that discusses a lot about what civility means, what it doesn’t mean and how it affects our daily live. So far I have enjoyed the book and have found some very interesting quotes and key points. “Although life entails hardship and suffering, we can do something about it- we can always do something about it”(6). I highlighted this quote in my book because it really stood out to me. When life gets hard the worst thing I think you can do is just to give up because you always have the power to change things. It’s not what happens to you it’s how you handle it. In this book so far I have learned a lot about civility that I hadn’t really noticed before.
Another quote I really enjoyed

was about politeness. “The very essence of politeness seems to be to take care that by our words and actions we make others people pleased with us as well as themselves”(10). I like this quote because it is so true and I have never identified politeness in this sense before; politeness is an act that not only makes you feel good it also make others feel good. A lot of the different parts of civility relate to each other when it comes to positivity and how you look at life. “Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on how we see them”(15). “Our happiness does not spring from the events of our lives but rather from how we choose to respond to those events”(10). I picked out both of these qoutes/points because I don’t think people realize that their attitude has a huge effect on their life. I think if more people would try to be more positive and look at the greater things in life people would live better, happier lives.
Before reading this book I have to admit I wasn’t always very civil in the past but after reading this book I realize how much I would like to be civil and how important it really is. I think sometimes we get irritated and frustrated and we drift farther away from civility. Eric Hoffer stated “Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength”(22). I included this quote because I think it is important to point out that being rude does not make you strong in a way it makes you weaker. Being polite is a more true characteristic of strength. The last important quote I pulled out of part one was “Social ties are the cheapest medicine we have”(28). When Shelley E. Taylor wrote this quote she was referring to the scientific proof that the stronger relationships you have with the people around you the healthier you will be. I believe this is true when you are depressed and have bad connections with people around you, you have a great chance of becoming sick. What I have taken from part one of choosing civility is that a lot of what affects you is based upon your attitude towards life.