What does it mean to “have it all”? We live in a society where the consensus agrees with Anne-Marie Slaughter who defines “have it all” in her essay “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All” as having both career value and family value. However, it should really about individual’s contentment. Many are struggling to find a satisfying career and hoping to get by day by day; so to have it all by society’s definition is nearly impossible. But with individual’s contentment, it is a contingency that anyone can have it all.
Society’s definition is conflicting when it comes to who can have it all. By balancing work and family, Slaughter believes both men and women can have it all. However, she argues that it is impossible with many type jobs to maintain
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both career and family; that is, one must sacrifice one for the other between career and family (Slaughter 679-681). She proposes a solution to achieve “work-family” value: flexibility in the workplace (Slaughter 689). Richard Dorment gives his response to Slaughter in his version “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All.” Based on her definition of “have it all”, he argues that one can’t have the cake and eat it too. What this means is that one can not fully devote to both career and family at the same time. As men are increasingly getting involved with family, they are asked to make the same sacrifice as women do (Dorment 697, 701). Therefore, his conclusion is no one can have it all. Society’s definition is too narrow on its audiences.
However, with individual’s contentment, it encompasses a broader group of audiences. For instance, it can include a child, a woman, a man, or anyone. For example, a child is contented when he received something he had always wanted for a present. To do that child, receiving what he always wanted means the world to him. A mother may wish for nothing more than to see her children growing successfully and living a good life. When her wishes bear fruits, she would feel contented, even though she might have sacrificed a lot during the course of raising her children. A father could be content with similar ideal. He may wish nothing more than to be able to support his family, to see that his wife and children are financially supported by working extra hours. Similarly, Slaughter, an elite feminist, believes she did not have it all by expressing her longing for motherhood and is not contented even though she has achieved a high-profile government position (Slaughter 676-677). When her stint from her government position is up, she becomes a dean at Woodrow Wilson School. With her position, she is able to make work schedule flexible for her to allow her the time for her family. Believing that with her flexibility at work, she can have have it all (Slaughter 687). However, it also tells us that she contented with her
decision. On the other hand, Dorment believes that even though in a “dual-income” family, both parents are breadwinners and caregivers, the parents have achieved work-family but may not be contented. He argues that men have a propensity to feel that they are more useful at work than at home (Dorment 709). And women are more emotionally attached to her children than man and would prefer to stay home more than men (Dormen 709, 715). He speaks about how did not take the full paternity leave when his wife was having a child. It is because he thinks his presence at home was not strictly necessary, but at work, he would have a purpose (Dorment 711). Dorment shows that he is not contented with work-family where he is obliged to balance work and family. Additionally, when I asked my friend about the matter, she replied that she would rather be “staying home than having to work, objectively, it’s a pretty good job.” She would be more contented to be at home. What these examples mean is that it is not a matter of having career or family that defines having it all, but what makes a person contented would define “have it all”. To “have it all” does not subject to what the general consensus defines for us, but to be able to decide on the best opportunities. These decisions in turn can make us contented or not. One can achieve work-family and not be contented about it. One also refers one or the other between work and family. But ultimately, it is what makes one contented that makes one feels one can “have it all.”
I would say that both articles offer very valid points and are both true in some ways. In Slaughter’s article I can definitely understand some of the points she makes about women struggling to balance their home life with work life, because I’ve witnessed it in some ways with my own mom. However men at the same time can also deal with some of these issues as well. I will say that personally I believe Dorment is accurate when saying neither men or women have it all, the decision to become a successful parent and professional is a personal choice. Dorment does recognize some of the hardships that women have to go through when trying to be successful at their profession and as parent. For instance he brings up unfair pay discrimination and sexism
The inability to achieve “work-life balance” has become a major focus for workplace equality activists. When this topic is brought about it is primarily used to describe how woman cannot have a work and home life but instead are forced to choose. Richard Dorment took on this point of interest from a different perspective in his article “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All” published with esquire. Going against the normal trend he describes how women are not the only ones put into the same sacrificial situations, but instead that men and women alike struggle to balance work and home. Dorment opens up by saying “And the truth is as shocking as it is obvious: No one can have it all.” In doing so Richard Dorment throws out the notion that one
In early nineteen centuries, Women helped shape the course of the American Revolution in numerous ways. However, national and state constitutions included little mention of women. Under the constitution, women did not have right to vote and were not allowed hold office. Judith Sargent Murray, a feminist writer, was one of the most prominent women of the Revolutionary era. She strived for the right and recognition of women from the society of her period. In the feminist essay, “On the Equality of Sexes,” Murray posed the argument of spiritual and intellectual equality between men and women.
At what point does work life start interfering with family life to an extent that it becomes unacceptable? Is it when you don’t get to spend as much time with your family as you would like, or is it the point where you barely get to see your family due to long hours at work? Is it even possible to balance work with family life? Anne-Marie Slaughter, the author of “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”, believes this balance is impossible to achieve in this day and age. In contrast, Richard Dorment, the author of “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All”, believes that there will never be a day when someone will have it all, certain sacrifices will always have to be made. Both of these articles are similar in the respect that they both examine balancing a demanding career with raising children. The two authors’ views on the subject differ greatly, especially regarding how gender roles have a significant impact on our society.
The struggle between happiness and society shows a society where true happiness has been forfeited to form a perfect order.
Today, women are not typically seen in higher levels of position in the work force than men. In Anne-Marie Slaughter’s article “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”, she uses her own experience to convey why it is not possible for a woman to work in a higher position, due to women being more emotional than men. People still believe it’s a women’s place to stay at home to cook, clean and take care of the children, while the men go to work to pay the bills. And it’s considered odd if the man is a stay at home father and the woman is working 24/7 and is never home. Even though it is rewarding to be able to always be there to see your child’s milestones in their life. It is always nice to get away from that life for even a moment. I don’t mean going out with the girls or guys, while you hire a babysitter, but helping your husband or wife pay the bills, so you have two rather than one income coming in at the end of the month. In Richard Dorment’s article, “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All” he states that both men and women can’t have it all. I agree with both Slaughter and Dorment, but not entirely. I believe if you want to be a good
Women in the 1930 were a significant part of everyday life, they just did not get credit for it. Women were not recognized for all that they did because men were put on a pesistool. The inequality in this time period affected everything women did. Women were important in American history because of their family roles, careers, and wages.
This unit explored desire satisfactionism, a term that generally speaks for itself. Though it is an umbrella term because there are different types. There is local desire satisfactionism, which is the idea that if desires are satisfied, one is happy. Then there is whole life satisfactionism. It means that to be happy is to have one desire satisfied. This is the overarching desire that your most important desires be satisfied. It is prioritized assessment of one’s life as a whole. To compare local desire satisfactionism with whole life satisfactionism would be like comparing quality and quantity from a hedonist perspective. It is similar in regard to desire satisfactionism, two different types. Several individuals discuss whole life satisfactionism
Women throughout history have been considered to have an active role in the family life as the caretakers, while the men are considered the “breadwinners” of the family. However, a few women still have had to provide for their families throughout the years and as a result have sought employment in industries that “were highly segregated by sex” (Goldin 87). Women employm...
Most Americans would say women are still being oppressed, even if inadvertently, by society’s current structure. Women are typically paid less, put under more pressure to have a career and a family, and are often underrepresented in high profile career fields. Anne-Marie Slaughter would agree. In her essay, “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”, she outlines the ways women are still unable to have a career and family life successfully. She especially focuses on the ways women are constantly being pressure to choose one over the other, or to try to accomplish both, and how much damage this pressure can cause. She writes, “I had been the one telling young women at my lectures that you can have it all, and do it all, regardless of what field you’re in. Which means, I had been in part, albeit unwillingly, of making millions of women feel they are to blame if they cannot manage to rise up the ladder as fast as men and, also have a family and an active home life.” (679). This passage captures the amount of pressure put on young women to commit 100% to their families and their careers simultaneously. Unfortunately, as she also points out, there will be criticism for choosing one over the other as well. Ellen Ullman also understands the pressure on women in their career fields. Her essay, How To Be A Woman Programmer, explores the difficulties for women in a male dominated field.
All occupations in the workforce are categorized as jobs for women or jobs for men, but women have another option of not going into the workforce and being a stay at home parent since being a stay at home parent is not considered a job. Women are pushed towards staying home, having children and consequently taking care of those children, while men are expected to be the breadwinners even though "fewer than one in five married families with children fit the stereotype of Dad as breadwinner, Mom full-time at home" (Bravo, Santa Anna, Meric 179). Gender roles have not caught up with the reality of American households, which is that women are working, as they always have been. Female dominated fields are fields such as maids, food preparation, secretaries, and social workers whereas male dominated fields are fields such as business, computer science, and the medical field. There is a hierarchy related to the different fields of work and fields of work that are dominated by men are thought highly of. Every field of work and every job requires hard work, time and effort so "why does society value accountant more than social workers" (Bravo, Santa Anna, Meric 178). The dualistic thinking towards fields of work creates a hierarchy since, as Crawley, Foley and Shehan stated; there are rarely dualisms that are created equally. The hierarchy of these fields of work causes female
Women used to stay home and take care of children or work part-time jobs. However, economic times have made it almost impossible to survive off of solely one income. Therefore, more women have joined the workforce which greatly contributed to the shrink of the wage gap, but there is still a large difference in working hours between men and women. From what we have already seen through Sobering’s research, women still obtain large responsibilities outside of the home. Because of this, women are not able to work the same amount of hours as men. Mandel and Semyonov’s research concluded that, “..in all decades, more than 90 % of men work more than 40 weekly hours), whereas the variance among women is much larger (more than one-third of working women worked fewer than 40 hours)” (Mandel and Semyonov). Therefore, women have greatly increased their working hours in the past decade, but most women still work less hours than men.
Historically, males and females normally assume different kinds of jobs with varying wages in the workplace. These apparent disparities are widely recognized and experienced across the globe, and the most general justification for these differences is that they are the direct outcomes of discrimination or traditional gender beliefs—that women are the caregivers and men are the earners. However, at the turn of the new century women have revolutionized their roles in the labor market. Specifically in industrialized societies, the social and economic position of women has shifted. Despite of the improving participation of women in the labor force and their ameliorating proficiency and qualifications, the labor force is still not so favorable to women. The opportunities available for women in the market are not as diverse as those presented to men. Still, the construct of gender ideology influences how employers undertake economic decisions, and that is why companies still have jobs labelled as “men’s work” and occupations categorized as “women’s work.” Indeed, the pervasiveness of gender differences in labor markets is undeniably true, specifically with respect to salary gap between men and women, occupational gender segregation of men and women, and the challenge that women face in terms of juggling their time and attention between their career and family life.
The roles women typically play in the family may not always be consistent with success in the occupational arena. Staying home to care for a sick child may conflict with an important meeting (Broman 1991:511). Sometimes there has to be a change of plans when it comes to the family. Most people believe that family comes first no matter what. Men 's engagement in paid work fulfills prescriptions of hegemonic masculinity by facilitating their ability to gain status in the public sphere. A man can judge his worth by the size of a paycheck (Thebaud 2010:335). Most research shows that women are more likely to be effected by the household and men are more likely to be effected by their job. Some people feel that the goal is to reach higher on the occupational
“The Satisfactions of Housewifery and Motherhood” was an interesting and informative article of what life was like when living in the shoes of a housewife in 1977. That was a time when women were going off to work in order to help support their families due to The Women’s Rights Movement. Society frowned upon those women who remained a housewife. They were viewed as blood sucking leaches living off their husbands. Terry Hekker believed that she would be one of the last housewives before their extinction. Some of the main beliefs that Ms. Hekker wanted to explain is there are misunderstandings about the role of a housewife, benefits can be gained and that the occupation of a housewife is an acceptable job for women. Terry Hekker proves that society back then left some women affected negatively by the “do-your-own-thing” philosophy. The author brought up a few arguments...