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Effective and ineffective coping mechanisms
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Parents, your only caretakers are the ones who support only you and your brothers and sisters. The ones who are there for you, feed you, and help with your homework. Some care, some do not care about you. Luckily, I had some that cared so much to me. You have so much fun with your family you just don’t feel like stopping. Like ups and downs in life, we had arguments and troubles. But when all of this come to a shocking result of death in the family, it can be devastating to deal with. As well as not being able to see your brother ever. Trust me, because I had to deal with my own devastating case of death in the family at a young age of 8. The sad fact that was about my mother’s death was that it was one of the best days of your year, your birthday.
Here is the story:
As I woke up on April 23rd, 2012, I was so excited since it was my birthday. The day was all planned, and we went up to the Pressbox Sports Bar and Grill (Located in Baraga, MI) to do some bowling and have some fun. As we came in, most of my family was there (Except my Grandma, Grandpa and other relatives from the Lower Peninsula and even far out of Michigan) and my mother got me the right size bowling shoes, and the right size ball. She had an illness at the time,
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He told me exactly what happened. She died from congestive heart failure at the age of 47. As soon as those words entered the brain, I knew soon that my life was changed forever. I started crying very, very hard and my father tried to comfort me. He was depressed too, but showed no signs of crying. In 2 days my mother’s funeral was planned. Then we had it. After the funeral was over, we all went to the Side Track Bar that we used to own for 15 years for an after-funeral feast. Everyone from my family came, my Uncle Larry from California and my Uncle Ray from San Antonio, TX. The feast went well and i was sort of depressed still, but tried not to
I’m glad we have Maurice, my mother’s younger brother here today. Ella, her older sister, unfortunately couldn’t make it, but I know the news of my mothers death hit her hard. And I know that she prayed with all her will, for my mother.
... funeral home and prepared to walk her out to her grave. The morticians loaded my aunt into the hearse. Everyone was walking behind the hearse until we reached her plot. My uncles and Dad pulled her out of the vehicle onto the bands for the funeral directors to lower her into the ground. Then the priest for what felt like an hour of words and gave the signal to lower her into the ground. While they were doing that, the priest passed out roses. We all threw the roses onto the burial vault and said our goodbyes and went home. When we got home we reflected on the times we had.
Finding out about my grandmothers death was the saddest moment in my life . I didn't understand . I didn't expect it to happen , not to me . I wondered why god had taken an important person away from my life , ad for that i felt confused and miserable . I cried for hours that day . Nothing could have brought me joy that day but the presence of my grandmother , but she was gone and i found it hard to overcome the situation.
As my family planned the funeral over the next few days, we began reminiscing about our time with my mom. This made me realize that I never take any of the time I spent with her for granted and I will cherish every moment I had with
while, being as he was rushing to Cooper Hospital to see my mother. At this
When I was younger, I remember feeling as though I lived in a bubble; my life was perfect. I had an extremely caring and compassionate mother, two older siblings to look out for me, a loving grandmother who would bake never ending sweets and more toys than any child could ever realistically play with. But as I grew up my world started to change. My sister developed asthma, my mother became sick with cancer and at the age of five, my disabled brother developed ear tumors and became deaf. As more and more problems were piled upon my single mother’s plate, I, the sweet, quiet, perfectly healthy child, was placed on the back burner. It was not as though my family did not love me; it was just that I was simply, not a priority.
There’s nothing more heart wrenching and soul consuming than losing a parent. You feel your whole world crumbling and blazing with a fire of disparity deep within your body. Rocking you into depression and holding you there till you feel as though you’ve lost your grasp in reality. The denial that, they are still there with you in this world and not lost forever in a sea of memories and a choir of “They’re watching you from up there, looking down at you.” But they’ll never know the connection that a father has with his daughter.
I know she heard us but she never opened her eyes again until that last moment, she opened her eyes one last night and my grandma told my great grandma “it’s okay mama go ahead daddy’s waiting for you I love you” that was when she took her last breath. It was July 29th around 3am when my dad came in my room and told me “Haley I’m going to the hospital grandma is gone.” At first I just said okay I was in a dead sleep so I didn’t comprehend it in that exact moment. A few minutes later I got out of bed I heard my brother pull in the drive way he left work early to come home and he and I sat and looked though pictures together shedding tears and laughing and asking each other if we remembered this. We all went up my great grandma’s house where all the family gathered about an hour and a half later. Even then I was fine it wasn’t until my grandma walked in the door which is my great grandmas daughter as soon as she did she just sat in my great grandmas’ chair and stated sobbing and that’s when it hit me that she was really gone this wasn’t just some dream it was real. I could taste salt from my tears running down my face into my mouth. After that it was all a complete
He had suffered from a stroke in October of 2013. Time had now passed, and it was January twenty-first, 2014. I had gone to visit him in the hospice center. Unfortunately, his health was deteriorating day by day. The doctors told my mom, grandma, and aunt, that he had only about three to five days left to live. This news made me uneasy and frightened. Little did I know that this was the last day I would get to talk to him, and see him alive. The next day at school, I felt that something was wrong, and I came home to find out that he had passed away. Similar to Alice, I had said goodbye to someone whom I loved dearly, for one last time, without having the knowledge that this would be my last interaction with
My father passed away in 1991, two weeks before Christmas. I was 25 at the time but until then I had not grown up. I was still an ignorant youth that only cared about finding the next party. My role model was now gone, forcing me to reevaluate the direction my life was heading. I needed to reexamine some of the lessons he taught me through the years.
I remember exactly when my dad called my sister and me in the living room to tell us the news. My dad’s face was a face I had never seen before, looked as pale as ice and chocked like if he had seen a ghost. I could see there was something wrong but nothing could have prepared me for that kind of news. The words came out and I thought at first it was a joke. I asked him the question and already knew the answer. My sister started crying and my dad fell in tears too. I couldn’t cry, just wouldn’t come out, I was too stunned by the horrible news.
My brother was a strong man we never though he was capable of killing his self. My brother left behind a wife and three children. Our family has never seen to be the same since my brother took his life. My mom grieves every day to herself. My mom never told me she was grieving, one day I had a talk with her and she told me she cries every day. I had my mom to go talk to her doctor. My brother children still have a difficult time because they miss my brother. Losing my brother due to death at an early age is a big heartbreak for the whole family. I miss my brother. Me and my brother is my mom only children. My mom and I are close, but when my brother died, my mom makes sure she tells me she loves me every time we depart on the phone or when we depart from one another. According to Ross Eshleman and Richard A. Bulcroft the Twelfth Edition “death is an inescapable event, one that will occur within all family and kin networks. Certainly, the loss of those one loves most intensely- parent, spouse, child, or other family member-causes tremendous pain.” My family is a good support system for me and my mom. My mother has four sisters that help her get through this major life event. My mother has a sister that has lost a son at an early age also. My aunt lost her son about six years ago, he got shot at college the week he was about to graduate. My aunt that lost her child and my mom talk on a daily basis. I think that this is how they deal with their lost by talking everyday knowing that they have experienced the same major event in their life. www.hepguide.org “The death of a love is one of life’s most difficult experiences. The bereaved struggle with many intense and frightening emotions, including depression, anger, and guilt. Often, he or she feels isolated and alone in his or her grief, but having someone to lean on can help him or her through the grieving process. “I feel emotions,
They took him away and we watched everything it all felt so unreal as we saw him go and from this point on we knew that we would never see him again. My dad meant the world and much more to me. The few next days we were setting up for the funeral which was one of the worst parts because everyone always came up to me and said are you okay and I think it was pretty obvious that I wasn't
Two years and four months ago I died. A terrible condition struck me, and I was unable to do anything about it. In a matter of less than a year, it crushed down all of my hopes and dreams. This condition was the death of my mother. Even today, when I talk about it, I burst into tears because I feel as though it was yesterday. I desperately tried to forget, and that meant living in denial about what had happened. I never wanted to speak about it whenever anyone would ask me how I felt. To lose my Mom meant losing my life. I felt I died with her. Many times I wished I had given up, but I knew it would break the promise we made years before she passed away. Therefore, I came back from the dead determined and more spirited than before.
It was Friday night, I took a shower, and one of my aunts came into the bathroom and told me that my dad was sick but he was going to be ok. She told me that so I did not worry. I finished taking a bath, and I immediately went to my daddy’s house to see what was going on. My dad was throwing-up blood, and he could not breath very well. One of my aunts cried and prayed at the same time. I felt worried because she only does that when something bad is going to happen. More people were trying to help my dad until the doctor came. Everybody cried, and I was confused because I thought it was just a stomachache. I asked one of my older brothers if my dad was going to be ok, but he did not answer my question and push me away. My body shock to see him dying, and I took his hand and told him not to give up. The only thing that I heard from him was, “Daughters go to auntie...