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Essay on homophobia
An essay on homophobia
Coming out of the closet summary
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When I came to terms with and accepted the fact that I was gay, the sudden realisation of why the call it “coming out of the closet” hit me like a giant blue pick up truck that every lesbian must mandatorily own. I realised what the term “the closet” meant on a much deeper level rather than my previous, quite stereotypical, assumption of it being called that just because us gays seem to have such great fashion sense. Although looking at myself I should’ve know that that wasn’t the case (I would wear pjs all day long if I didn’t have to interact with the human race and get shit done). But enough of my lack of fashion sense (if only I could give my friends the same break…).
The closet holds such a symbolic meaning, and to each LGBT+ individual the experience is different. But we all converge in some way or another on the way that we feel, the process of acceptance and the big one (arguably), coming out. The closet represents the dire feeling of isolation from your peers, your family, the world and sometimes even from the sense of yourself. It is dark, small, frightful and at times brings upon the feeling of complete hopelessness (with the
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occasional stench of an old sock, or maybe that’s just a sign that I should clean mine…). Although for some it is the safe haven that protects them from the, sometimes, cruelty of the world. But the feeling of loneliness eventually begins to catch up the longer you stay in there, creeping up on you the longer that you stay in there and suddenly you feel disconnected and secluded. As if there’s no place for you in the world outside. But you oh so desperately want to get out. Being in a place as claustrophobic as the closet, it dawns upon you how little space you have to be yourself. But however small it may be, however hard it may get to breathe, you continue to live. Through the gap between the door and the floor (A+ rhymeage), the air continues to seep in. Reminding you that there is still a world out there for you, and the air is yours to breathe too. Stepping out of the closet…the feeling is almost indescribable, but I’ll give it my best shot. It is like being unshackled from the chains of captivity. The world gets brighter and you feel the bliss of this new found freedom wash over you, baptising you into a world where you can finally have the room to be yourself. However this was only my experience (so far), and for some the experience might be harrowing, even putting them into further feelings of isolation. For example, some are forced out of the closet without their consent for the pure intention of humiliating them and possibly making them feel worse than they already do. Others who come out (willingly or unwillingly) are met with resentment and disgust. Some lose their friends, their families and some even lose their lives. With these being a real possibility for LGBT+ individuals, the closet looks better and better… But fear not, my friend. For the world can be ugly but if you squint a little then you might catch a glimpse of some decency in this crap hole. I know it can feel daunting to come out, and staying in the closet can make you feel imprisoned at times.
But just know that whether you choose to stay in the closet or to come out, it will all be okay. Whether people accept you for who you are and continue to love you or decide to turn their backs on you, it will all be okay (at least you won’t see their nasty faces). You might feel so so alone but just remember that there are people out there who are going through something so similar to you and you are not alone in the way that you feel. Days might get shit and things might feel hopeless, but there are people out there who love you and support you. If you feel like you don’t have anyone that already does, then hold on. Because they will come into your life and they’ll end up giving the love that the oceans can’t
contain. So to conclude, the closet is a place that I had never thought of much beyond it being a place to throw all my clothes in (some that I should probably wash…). But through my journey of accepting my sexuality and being more educated about the LGBT+ community, I have learnt that it is so much more than that. I have learnt that even though people might give you looks of repulsion and as if you’re the gum on the bottom of their shoe that they so desperately are trying to get off, there are also those who have kindness flowing through their veins and they wouldn’t mind sharing it. The world will become better, it will become more accepting. It’ll take time, but we’ll get there. And I hope that there will be a day where there won’t be anymore closets, where there won’t be a single child soaking their pillows with tears at night as they wonder how anyone will ever accept and love them. A day where whether LGBT+ individuals deserve the same rights as anyone outside of the community isn’t a topic of debate anymore and words such as gay aren’t treated as swear words. I don’t know if that will all happen in my life time, but we fight today so the generations that will succeed us won’t have to.
Today in our society, this kind of ordeal is happening everywhere. You read about it in magazines, see it on different talk shows, or you might even know someone who has gone through it or is considering it. If you are not happy with yourself you are going to be miserable until something is done about it. If that means coming out of the closet or going a step further and having a sex change, more power to you. You can't make everyone around you happy. Your first mission is to feel good about yourself. If your friends and family are genuine they will like you no matter what the circumstances are. In my own personal life, I have been friends with Pierce my guy best friend since the fifth grade. He moved away to Florida our ninth grade year.
They mention the transition of “the closet,” as being a place in which people could not see you, to becoming a metaphor over the last two decades of the twentieth century used for queers who face a lack of sexual identity. Shneer and Aviv bring together two conflicting ideas of the American view of queerness: the ideas of the past, and the present. They state as queerness became more visible, people finally had the choice of living multiple lives, or integrating one’s lives and spaces (Shneer and Aviv 2006: 245). They highlight another change in the past twenty years as the clash between being queer and studying queerness (Shneer and Aviv 2006: 246-7). They argue that the active and visible contests over power among American queers show that queers now occupy an important place in our culture. They expand on the fact that queerness, real, and performed, is everywhere (Shneer and Aviv 2006: 248). This source shows the transformation in American culture of the acceptance of queerness. It makes an extremely critical resource by providing evidence of the changes in culture throughout the last two decades. Having the information that queerness is becoming more accepted in culture links to a higher percentage of LGBTQ youths becoming comfortable with their sexual identity. However, compared to the other sources, this
Gender roles in a small, rural community are specific as to what a woman “is” and what a man “is”, and these norms are strictly enforced by the rural society. Cooper says that in childhood, “Rejection of the traditional feminity appeared in three ways:1) taking the role of the male, 2) being a tomboy, and 3) avoiding feminine dress and play” (Cooper, pg. 168). This rejection of the traditional roles as a child creates a stigma, or label, attached by society to these individuals. The punishment from society is greater than the punishment of an unfulfilled self. The lessened ability to obtain health insurance, health information on the partner, and other benefits also plays a key role in coming out. The rural lesbian society is so small a...
Many transgender people lived in dysfunctional families when they were young. The support becomes vital for the wellbeing of kids. In her book Redefining Realness by Janet Mock, recaps the importance of support from Michelle his cousin, who kept in secrets of gender dysphoria of Charles (Keisha) by saying “‘Pinkie –swear you won’t tell your mom’…She’d keep the secret my secret because I was her favorite cousin” (Mook 76). Michelle, kept Keisha’s secret by allowing her to use her swimming clothes. Michelle shows the importance of support from relatives. This is a fundamental factor that might help with the development of her gender identity. Many transgender people may feel a relief at the time to disclose their identity. When transition is in progress the support from friends and families becomes important because, many transgender people might suffer if they lack support. Many transgender people seem depressed because they are rejected by society. Janet Mock, relates how Wendi, support Charles, by making him feel comfortable, saying “Wendi and I grew inseparable trough middle school, a bond that would link us for the rest of our lives. Through association, my class –mates learned that I was like Wendi-who hadn’t yet adopted any labels to describe her shifting self” (Mook 107). In most cases transgender people’s acquaintances can be referred as transgender people just by friendship. The association makes transgender people to gain confidence about their gender identity. The support from groups or friends makes transgender people feel that they are accepted and not alone. Support from friends might urge transgender people to come out the “closet” and reveal their gender identity to gain respect among society. The support from friends is important, but family support seems to be the most important. When families do not support transgender people it causes a hostile environment that may suppress
Andrew Sullivan, author of, What is a Homosexual, portrays his experience growing up; trapped in his own identity. He paints a detailed portrait of the hardships caused by being homosexual. He explains the struggle of self-concealment, and how doing so is vital for social acceptation. The ability to hide one’s true feelings make it easier to be “invisible” as Sullivan puts it. “The experience of growing up profoundly different in emotional and psychological makeup inevitably alters a person’s self-perception.”(Sullivan)This statement marks one of the many reasons for this concealment. The main idea of this passage is to reflect on those hardships, and too understand true self-conscious difference. Being different can cause identity problems, especially in adolescents.
For years homosexuality in the United States of America has been looked down upon by citizens, religions, and even politicians. The homosexual culture, or the LGBT (Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender), has been demoralized and stuck out and lashed against by the Heterosexual community time and time again. To better understand the LGBT community we must first grasp the concept of Sexual Orientation.
The history of the gay rights movement has been a hard fought battle within the United States. In fact the first gay rights movement dates back to 1924 with the creation of The Society for Human Rights in Chicago, Illinois. It wasn’t until the 1960’s that gay rights started to make progress. In the year 1969 The Stonewall Riots took place when gay, lesbian, and transgender patrons of a New York bar were raided by the police. This forever changed the movement from isolated incidents to a world wide phenomenon.
For many generations, especially in North America, homosexuality was not accepted in any way, shape, or form. Many believed that it was a medical illness that was curable, when in reality, people were, and still are, ignorant and could not come to terms that everyone in this world is different from one another. For many instances of being treated unjust, many individuals in the gay community did not want to “expose” themselves and remained in the “closet”. As means to make gays and lesbians proud and take a stand for who they are, a movement spread across internationally. This movement is known as “The Gay Liberation” movement which occurred between the late 1960s and the early to mid 1970s (“Gay Liberation”). The Gay Liberation movement urged individuals of the gay community to “come out,” revealing their sexuality to their loved ones as a form of activism, and to counter shame with gay pride (“Gay Liberation”). The Stonewall Riots are believed to have been the spark that ignited the rise of the Gay Liberation movement; it influenced the way the gay community is viewed socially and how their rights are politically present day.
Whether it be for religious reasons, or simply because they are afraid of how people might react, many of the LGBT+ community live in fear, never telling people how they really feel. There are many gay, bi, transgender, and more, living on the street simply because their parents abandoned them once they had come out. “In America, up to 1.6 million youth experience homelessness each year. The statistics for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) homeless youth are even more shocking, as this group represents up to 40% all young people experiencing homelessness...Half of all teens get a negative reaction from their parents when they come out to them. More than 1 in 4 are thrown out of their homes” (True Colors Fund, 1). LGBT+ youth, representing around 7% of the total youth, find difficulty living the American Dream that they dreamed of as
Imagine living your life pretending to be someone you are not. Of course hiding who you really are is going to have an effect on you in many ways. In “The Shadow Side of Everyday Life,” Zweig and Abrams suggest that every person has a shadow and “the shadow acts like a psychic immune system, defining what is self and what is not-self”(325). They also believe that our shadows contain dark qualities. When a homosexual person passes as straight, they suppress a dark shadow that is hidden from the world. Although, having a double life is often seen having a primarily psychological origin there are also social reasons that homosexuals choose that lifestyle. Laws such as Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell and same-sex marriage laws are some social causes that contribute to self-concealment. There are also psychological reasons such as family relationships and bullying that lead to living a double life. What can we do to stop this dilemma and make our society better? We can treat gays to stop being gay or inform society that being gay is not a choice depending on whether they chose that lifestyle or not.
I was born on March 08, 1995 at roughly seven pounds. When I was extracted from my mother, I was given the gender of a male with the appearance of my male body parts. My mother used to say to me, growing up as a toddler that I had so much hair like former American Football player, Troy Polamalu. People had always assumed that I was a girl, therefore my mother had to correct them and say, “No, he is a boy”. Growing up a toddler, I was always wearing some type of jeans with a sports shirt and shoes that were mostly colored black or blue. As I grew older, I gained interest in baseball, wrestling, and the military. I always wanted to play with action figures such as GI Joe and wrestling celebrities in addition to imaginary flying in an apache helicopter or taking command in a battle tank. Advancing to my pre-teen years, I wanted to play baseball, which is considered to be mostly a boy sport. It was at this moment, that my gender was a boy. Progressing to my teen years, I started to observe my father and learn my gender on his roles as the man in our family. I noticed that my father was already taking charge in the house and giving me orders that I needed to complete. Going through middle school, most boys had some type of sports backpack while the girls
In today's society, there exists a mixture of issues which tend to raise arguments with people all over. There are a handful of topics that always seem to escalate these differences between people to the point where one who earnestly participates in discussion, debate and argument can direct their anger towards their feelings on the person themselves. Some examples of such delicate subjects are the death penalty, abortion, and euthanasia. An issue that has in recent years, begun to increase arguments, is the acceptability of homosexuality in society. Until recently, homosexuality was considered strictly taboo. If an individual was homosexual, it was considered a secret to be kept from all family, friends, and society. However, it seem that society has begun to accept this lifestyle by allowing same sex couples. The idea of coming out of the 'closet' has moved to the head of homosexual individuals when it used to be the exception. Homosexuality is nothing to be ashamed of and we should all come to realize this.
Once upon a time, I saw the world like I thought everyone should see it, the way I thought the world should be. I saw a place where there were endless trials, where you could try again and again, to do the things that you really meant to do. But it was Jeffy that changed all of that for me. If you break a pencil in half, no matter how much tape you try to put on it, it'll never be the same pencil again. Second chances were always second chances. No matter what you did the next time, the first time would always be there, and you could never erase that. There were so many pencils that I never meant to break, so many things I wish I had never said, wish I had never done. Most of them were small, little things, things that you could try to glue back together, and that would be good enough. Some of them were different though, when you broke the pencil, the lead inside it fell out, and broke too, so that no matter which way you tried to arrange it, they would never fit together and become whole again. Jeff would have thought so too. For he was the one that made me see what the world really was. He made the world into a fairy tale, but only where your happy endings were what you had to make, what you had to become to write the words, happily ever after. But ever since I was three, I remember wishing I knew what the real story was.
Ever since I was little I’ve been what you would call a “high achieving” kid. I did well in school, I did well in sports and I did well in my community. I was always the first one to class, and the last one to leave the field. I was the kid that all my friends’ parents compared their children to. I was the kid with a room full of trophies and awards. In my mind, the worst possible thing I could do was disappoint the people around me. In elementary school I was involved in every club imaginable. I was in the band, I played in the orchestra, I sang solos for chorus, I was in the math club, I was president of student council, I played travel soccer, I was involved in every activity possible, and I excelled in all of them. This
...viant, thus marginalized even demonized. While in recent times there has undeniably been a greater sense of acceptance toward homosexuals, there are definitely generalizations that tend to hinder the overall perspective on identity. The issue of sexual identity and gender has recently been brought to the forefront of social discourse due largely to the major activism of the LGBTQ community and countless progressive institutions. Through the recognition of the gender binary one can see that there are an array of preferences for being and behaving. Rather than having to follow traditional roles people should be able to be masculine, feminine, androgynous, aggressive, vulnerable, or indifferent. The issue is not necessarily diversity, but rather openness to gender possibilities and the freedom to experiment and shamelessly explore facets of one’s individual expression.