Miriam Tow 'All My Puny Sorrows'

Miriam Toews’ All My Puny Sorrows, takes readers on an emotional adventure through the lives of two sisters Yolandi and Elfrieda by showing that love is one of the most powerful emotions and can make us do almost anything for the people around us. Elf, the older sister, has been made out to have a perfect life. Yoli, the younger sister, isn’t as fortunate as her sister Elf but always finds love in the little things. With her novel, Toews redefines love in all of its means. This novel has proved love can come in any type of form; sister to sister love, sister to mother love, intimate love, and love towards a religion or belief.

In All My Puny Sorrows, Yoli and Elf are two sisters who share a loving relationship that is a main focus of the novel.

She has made a career out of her childhood hobby of playing the piano as well as has found a loving husband who supports her, but for some reason, Elf wants to die. Yoli, Elf’s younger sister, does not have what she thinks is a perfect life. She is divorced, financially unstable, and is constantly trying to keep her sister alive. Toews proves the ups and downs of their loving relationship by jumping from the past to present throughout the whole novel, looking into the relationship between the two sisters. “She wanted to die, and I wanted her to live and we were enemies who loved each other” (Toews 37). Their sibling relationship is the longest relationship someone can have and usually, like Yoli and Elf’s relationship, it’s complicated. However, Yoli’s love for her sister shifts as she matures. When Yoli was younger, she would show her love through imitation. She wanted to be like Elf multiple times, one being in the back seat of their car and Elf said sex. It was at that moment Yoli was shocked because it was her first time hearing the word spoken. She remembered the look on Elf’s face in the car and it was covered with a proud smile. “That day I became acutely aware of her new powers and I wanted to be her.”

Miriam Toews grew up in a Mennonite community. Mennonites are Christian groups from the church communities of Anabaptist denominations of Friesland in what is now the Netherlands. They were taught how they believe in both the mission and ministry of Jesus and over the years, Mennonites have become known as one of the historic peace churches because of their commitment to pacifism. Toews says that her family was “liberal and supportive of ideas and free thinking”, but she still left home at the age 18. She travelled around Europe, had children, and now, in her early 50s, lives in Toronto. She says she still considers herself Mennonite. In All My Puny Sorrows the Mennonite community’s disapproval of Yolandi and Elfrieda mother’s choice to become a social worker and turn her home into an office brings “a steady stream of sad and angry Mennonites came to our house, usually in secret because therapy was seen as lower even than bestiality because at least bestiality is somewhat understandable in isolated farming communities.” is based on past Mennonite religion and opinion. Toews writing in All My Puny Sorrows is based on her experience of her family and the community it lives in. Women in the Mennonite community was also an important fracture of her writing. “My mother would fight for him (although only up to a point because she was, after all, a loyal Mennonite wife and didn't want to upset the apple cart of