What makes a person lie? In Judith Viorst “The Truth about Lying” she talks about the different types of lying and when people decide to lie and the different types of lying. What makes someone lie is a person who does not want to hurt someone's feelings, wanting to get out of trouble, and avoiding an argument. Lying only benefits certain types of people.
Let's say someone does not want to hurt their friends feelings, it would benefit both of them for lying. One friend does not have to break their other friend’s heart while the other friend does not have their heart broken. As Viorst uses a husband and a wife to prove her point one of the spouses of the couple says “She says she's being wise”. The spouse meant that his wife thought she was wise that she was saving herself and her mother hassle and pain because she was using a peace keeping lie. The people that do not want their feelings to be hurt lying would be useful to them, they would like to be lied to.
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A great deal of people lies to get out of trouble.
A great example of this is when a person gets in trouble and they blatantly lie to get out of the mess they got themselves into. These lies are for personal gain unlike some of the other lies. These lies are even more manipulating then the lies you tell to not hurt someone's feelings. This lie is only beneficial when “those of us whose lies and don't get caught”. If the person who are lying and gets caught will get in more trouble. That will defeat the whole purpose of lying in the first place. When lying to get out of trouble and it works that is when lying would be
beneficial. Lying is extremely useful when a person does not like to argue. Life is so much easier when there is no arguing involved. A couple in Viorst article says “Why should we have useless fights? We get along much better when I lie to her.” If it makes someone's life easier, why not do something. Would this make that person a coward since they do not wish to face consequences and have the argument. As Viorst says herself, she feels like a coward, every time she makes a peace keeping lie which is a lie to avoid arguments. This type of lie would only benefit people who are able to lie without feeling guilty this is probably not healthy. Arguments are a hassle, the benefit is getting out of a fight that you would not want to be in. Lying can only help a certain population of people who are willing to go out of there way to lie. If you want to save someone feeling or get out of a difficult situation or even a dispute then lying would probably be on your mind. Some one these lies would benefit the situation for some people until the truth came out.
Richard Gunderman asks the question, "Isn 't there something inherently wrong with lying, and “in his article” Is Lying Bad for Us?" Similarly, Stephanie Ericsson states, "Sure I lie, but it doesn 't hurt anything. Or does it?" in her essay, "The Ways We Lie.” Both Gunderman and Ericsson hold strong opinions in regards to lying and they appeal to their audience by incorporating personal experiences as well as references to answer the questions that so many long to confirm.
Although it is considered wrong to tell lies, it seems that literature has offered us situations where telling lies isn’t necessarily bad. Of course, lying often has a tragic outcome, but not always for the person or people who told the lie or lies. Oftentimes, these unfortunate outcomes are directed at the person about whom the lie was told. Furthermore, these stories have explained that dishonesty can result in success for both the liar and the target. Maybe we have been teaching the wrong values to our children.
The society that we live in today is built around lies. Banks lying to customers in order to feed the capitalist mindset, politicians lying to citizens in order to gain power, and charities taking donations with open arms however are stingy when giving back to the cause. The common reason why these organizations lie is to hide what they truly are. People also deceive others in order to hide who they truly are. From a young age, lying becomes engraved into one’s mind, we are taught to walk, talk, and lie.
Are everyday rituals, such as, facades reflected as to being a lie? Simply preparing for a meeting or interview does not come off as lying, although another type of façade such as when someone asks, “Are you okay,” after a death of someone close to you, in reality it is a form of a lie, because you are not being honest. In Stephanie Erricsson’s article “The Ways We Lie,” she discusses many different types of lying, that most wouldn’t even consider. Ericsson claimed, “But façades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (409). Depending how a façade is used, the outcome can be beneficial or damaging. There are facades that are used to cover up one’s true feelings, in order to protect an individual and then there is a type in which one puts on a mask to cover up how awful of a person they are. Charity, a former friend, deceived me with the qualities of everything she was not, my mom is a great example of when it comes to hiding when she is saddened. In this article “The Ways We Lie,” Stephanie Ericsson has a great point of view on the destructiveness of facades, although, it can very well be used in a good way just as much as in a bad way, in fact, like my protective mother, using facades for mine and my sisters own good and then a conniving friend using facades in
At certain times it might feel right for some people to help the people that they love by lying. Elizabeth, Proctor's wife, does not tell the truth about her husband's affair in front of the society to protect her husband. She describes her husband as a “good and righteous man” in the court (Miller 113). However, that is not the truth. When a person loves someone, he or she would do anything to help that person. Some people choose the right way, while the others choose the wrong path. Elizabeth decides to lie for the first time just to save Proctor from the problems that he might face if the truth is revealed. Similarly, a teenage girl lies about her friend’s abortion to protect her. De Paulo says, “People tell these serious lies to protect something when the truth could threaten something that they really value” (Kelleher 1). In this case, the girl took the same step to save her friend. People do not want to see their loved ones suffer. As a result, they hide the truth to protect that person from danger. To protect others, they forget the bad outcomes and the trouble they might have to face for telling lies. Not only do people lie for others, but they lie for their own
In many cultures, deception does not directly imply evil, but a useful tool that can solve problems quickly. For kind purposes, parents use deception to advise, teach and help their children to have a better lives. While for others, deception is for selfish reasons. Throughout the Joy Luck Club, many complain about being victims of deception, but they too are deceiving others. It is a skill passed down from generation to generation.
She lies to the bank so she doesn’t get charged with “$60 in overdraft fees”, out-and-out lie. She does not tell the truth to her husband about her day so he does not “[keel] over,” white lie. She lies to her clients so that she does not get fired for telling the truth about the reason she is late. She lies to her friends so that her friend’s feelings do not get hurt, (Ericsson 181).All of these are justifiable because of the intent. There are consequences to telling the truth in these cases and thus Ericsson needs to lie to avoid the
In the short story The Ways We Lie, Stephanie Ericsson describes many different categories of lies. She first starts out explain the little white lie, describing it as a lie which is told when trying to avoid hurting someone. An example she gives in the text is, “telling a friend he looks great when he looks like hell can be based on a decision that the friend needs a compliment more than a frank opinion”(Ericsson, 2004, 121). Ericsson then describes facades, facades according to the Ericsson is when a person shows you what they want you to see, but it’s not the real them. Stating “facades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (Ericsson, 2004, 122). A perfect example of facades are when a person has to
I do not believe that anyone should get their feelings hurt when just saying an innocent white lie could save them so much drama. Also protective lies are very important to me. If someone is dealing with a lot of stress or a deathly illness, there is no need to put more on them. However, when it comes to peace keeping lies, I believe that they should not be used. These lies are very hard not to use, and I find myself using them despite my hardest efforts. Trust-keeping lies are one of the worst lies because I feel forced to choose between my personal morals and a friendship. Although I try not to lie at all, I find that social lies and protective lies are the most acceptable. I find that peace-keeping lies and trust-keeping lies are unacceptable yet I still understand that sometimes they are
When confronted with a problem, why does the human brain default to lying? Dishonesty is never a solution, although it may seem like the best option in the spur of a moment. My grandma always gave the example of her youth: she avoided and deceived her friend’s sister because the little girl riled everyone. Come to find out, the sister passed the following month due to an illness. I could never imagine the guilt she experienced. Nevertheless, everyone has been deceitful before and many characters were in the tragedy, The Crucible, by playwright Arthur Miller. Reasons for lying are understandable, but most people will admit that mendacity has only caused pain. Lying’s outcome is never positive: it may seem like a good option, for falsehood can save a person’s life, benefit someone, and it eases stress, but these are all transitory.
Stephanie Ericsson’s The Ways We Lie, analyzes and reflects on how lying has simply become the norm in our society. We all lie, there is not one person in the world that does not lie. Most people lie because they are afraid of telling the truth, however what they do not know is telling a lie can lead them in the wrong direction because many things can happen when lying to a person. The person can find out when everything unravels that person will not have trust in you and you would be known as a liar. To every action there is a consequence, so why not deal with just one consequence when telling the
Author Allison Kornet in her article (1997) “The Truth about Lying: Has Lying Gotten a Bad Rap” states that deception or lying has become a part of everyone’s life. A person lies or deceives as often as he brushes his teeth or combs his hair. Many psychologists have neglected or ignored the concept of deception or lying and its effects on everyone’s life. Kornet explains that in the previous two to three decades, the psychologists started noticing or analyzing the effects of a person’s deception on others or why a person lies so many times in his day-to-day life. The person might learn lying from childhood
The article, “Is Lying Bad for Us,” accurately describes the intentions of a “liar.” The author says, “Though liars do not tell the truth, they care about it, while the bullshitter does not even care about the truth and seeks merely to impress” (Gunderman). This statement proves that lying should not be viewed as out of the ordinary, or unacceptable, and that liars should not be viewed as bad people. Lying can be shown as a way of protecting or caring
Telling the truth teaches one person self- respect for themselves and others as well. Telling the truth also sets a good example for others to do the same thing and make a “chain reaction”. People can make a “chain reaction” by passing on what they have done from one person to another, and before you know it, everyone is changing greatly, and the world is progressing tremendously. Lies are told all around the world, and they are told every day. One lie can often lead to another lie and cause you to be caught up in one big lie that will be hard to get out of if people do not tell the truth. If a person thinks that is okay to lie, they better think again, the truth always comes out no matter how hard a person tries to keep it in, or how much someone thinks that they can get away with lying. No person can keep in or hold a grudge with what they have done. After all, telling the truth is the right thing to do, and everyone should do it. Telling the truth is always much easier than the trouble of a
This essay is about why lying is always wrong. Lying could be bad depending on the situation but sometimes telling a “white” lie could save a person from getting his feelings hurt. A lie is giving false information while believing it to be untrue, intending to deceive by doing so. A lie has three essentials features: A lie communicates some false information, the liar intends to deceive or mislead, and the liar believes that what they are saying is not true. Lying is bad because it treats those who are lied to as a mean to achieve the liar’s purpose, rather than a valuable end in them.