Is Shame Worth A Good Thing?

What is shame? According to Wikipedia, shame is a painful, social emotion that can be seen as resulting from comparison of the self's action with the self's standards. In other words, it is the feeling you get when you know that you have done something that goes completely against your moral compass. So, is shame good or bad? That all depends on what aspect of shame you look at. The concept of shame itself is really complex, you have to take into consideration so many different emotions and factors that determine whether it is good or bad.

Lets take a look at how shame can be considered a good thing. Shame can be used as a challenge to better ourselves. For example, if a teacher told a student that he would never make anything of himself then the student might take that as a challenge and end up being a drop out millionaire. In an article on Psychology Today they described this type of shame as “healthy shame,” They go on to describe the differences between healthy shame and toxic shame, stating that healthy shame is basically guilt. They use this example to describe guilt, “I feel badly about my behavior, and

Shame can make someone feel as if they are a terrible person who can never be anything better than that. When this happens the person usually ends up continuing down that path of bad decisions, because in their eyes they can never be anything better than that. In the Psychology Today article this was described as “toxic shame.” This type of shame is very unhealthy for its bearer and can cause feelings of worthlessness, lowered self-esteem, and depression. I could use the same example that I used earlier to describe this as well. If a teacher was to tell a student that they would never make anything of himself, then that student might become depressed, and instead of dropping out and becoming a millionaire, he drops out and becomes a bum who lives in his parents