Interpersonal Analysis Paper Dialectical tensions exist in all relationships, and in order to fully understand them, we can analyze how and why they come to exist, how we deal with them, and the impact that they have on our relationships. In this paper I will be analyzing the relationship with my girlfriend, Katelyn. The three dialectical tensions I will be focusing on are autonomy and connectedness, which is the balance between individual independence and the need for connection between two people, novelty and predictability, the balance between new and exciting things and things that are familiar to the two people in a relationship, and lastly openness and closedness, the balance between being open with private information and choosing to …show more content…
According to an article written by Robert Duran, Lynne Kelly, and Teodora Rotaru, being in a relationship requires us to give up some independence. The balance between the autonomy and connectedness in our relationship has been constantly shifting throughout the four years that we have been together, as has our physical proximity. Proximity is defined as the distance between two people. In the beginning of our relationship, Katelyn and I were living very different lives. I was entering my sophomore year in high school, and spent a lot of my time playing and practicing football, playing video games at home, or spending time with friends outside of school. She had a very busy senior year in high school, taking several college-level courses as well as spending many hours rehearsing for theatre productions at her high school. We did not spend a lot of time together, since we were both busy in our own ways, but when we were together we enjoyed that time immensely. We were very independent of each other, but one thing that caused tension in our relationship in the first year or …show more content…
While there are going to be times where Katelyn or I want to wait a day or two to tell the other person about a specific event that happened so that we can individually take time to break it down and fully understand how we feel about it, we always tell each other about everything and how we feel about it. The dialectical tension of openness and closedness has never been a major problem in our relationship. It may be our Christian faith that has helped us to want to always be there for each other and keep each other accountable. I am not implying that all non-Christians struggle with this, but our faith has been helpful to us, specifically. Katelyn and I had known each other for a couple of years before we began dating, so I think that helped us be more comfortable with each other from the start. According to Joe Ayres, relationship development progresses from superficial non-intimate areas to more intimate, deeper layers of the selves. This goes along with the Social Penetration Model which shows how relationships progress toward intimacy as a result of self-disclosure from both partners. Because we were friends for the first couple of years that we knew each other, by the time we had started dating we had already disclosed a lot of personal information about ourselves and had therefore already penetrated into the inner layers of our personalities. As we became older and
Chapters 5 and 6 in Extraordinary Relationships gave a good introduction into new concepts relating to Human Interactions and Relationships. These new concepts give a better idea in understanding relationship patterns and the various emotions that come along with relationships. Two concepts that stood out to me that were discussed throughout the chapter were relationship patterns and relationship emotions. Over time many relationships develop their own unique patterns. In many cases these patterns have been part of the individual all along. Gilbert (1992) states “Usually what people do in a relationship crises is more of the same thing they have been doing, only more intensely and more anxiously” (pg.36). When individuals go through relationship
This paper will analyze Harry and Sally’s relationship, focusing on normative attachment, while still considering the individual differences that play a part in their relationship. The paper will further divulge into how their relationship can be analyzed using themes such as, conflict, support, and capitalization.
Relationships play an important role in one's life. They are formed on the basis of love and understanding. Relationship helps various people in every aspect of life and assists them in being a better person. Such a relationship was found in the novel
Joan Theresa is the woman who asks Kate to investigate Janet's case. She lives in a women's commune and is not affiliated to any university. Despite not knowing Kate, she greets her with “'You're Kate'” (Cross 8). By using her first name, she offers Kate a relationship based on equality and does not acknowledge her title. In Joan's case, it is most likely that this title is irrelevant for their relationship (cf. Danziger 43), even though Kate's affiliation to a university plays an important role in the solving of the case. Still, Kate agrees to Joan's view of their relationship: “'Kate ordered capuccino [sic] and some sort of sandwich, and asked for Joan Theresa. 'Tell her it's Kate,' Kate said, falling back on the new first name culture” (Cross
Never become complacent and let my interpersonal relationship becomes stagnant, which can lead to resentment and conflict. Weighing the cost verses the rewards may not always be the solution for my relationship; simply, because the cost may ultimately outweigh the rewards. The need for autonomy can have reverse effects and may not lead to the closeness that’s expected. In, turn the very thing that, I try to be open about in my relationship can inadvertently cause me to protect my feelings in the
Chapter 9 Gendered Close Relationships is about stereotypes for men and women ideas on how to behave in relationships. The expectations for male and female in a relationships have been set by their gender roles. The meaning of personal relationships is where partners depend on each other for various things from affection to material assistance. Partners are expected affection, companionship and energy. The two main models of personal relationships are male deficit model and alternate paths model. Male deficit model suggests male lack skills in developing relationships with others. In alternate paths model, men and women just have different ways to sustain a relationship. It’s not that men lack skills but men show it in a different way.
How would one feel if ones significant other was constantly disobeying the relationship? In Irwin Shaw’s “The Girls in Their Summer Dresses”, he shows how important having a trustworthy and honest relationship is. This short story highlights the flaws in romantic relationships by demonstrating how one needs some type of relationship in life, how fragile a relationship can be, and how many take loved ones for granted.
This poem has captured a moment in time of a dynamic, tentative, and uncomfortable relationship as it is evolving. The author, having shared her thoughts, concerns, and opinion of the other party's unchanging definition of the relationship, must surely have gone on to somehow reconcile the situation to her own satisfaction. She relishes the work entailed in changing either of them, perhaps.
Marriage could take two close friends far away from each other, but the emotional intimacy continued to be strong, as demonstrated in letters sent to one-another. This was not considered strange, as the gender roles enforced on the men and women included restrictions on intimacy between young heterosexual couples. Men and women were segregated to the point that the lack of the opposite sex within their social circle stunted the emotional intimacy and spontaneity of romantic relationships. A woman 's close friend was a consistent source of emotional intimacy within a relationship, which strengthened the relationship between the two
The information in this article is very helpful for my paper for various reasons. One of the main reasons is the fact that the information will help readers get a better understanding of how the theory itself helps different types of relationships. My situation involves misunderstanding in our relationship communication which is very similar to the couples in the articles. Having examples of how the Relational Dialectics Theory helps these couples in the article is helpful to implement into my research paper as well.
The more you get to know someone, the more you are able to make better decisions and judgments for not just yourself, but for your partner as well. How a couple handles issues while
For example, if you know the romantic rules of the relationship rules theory then you should have a better awareness of what to do and what not to do in order to make a relationship work. Although you do have to know that there is a difference in romantic rules, as well as in other relationship theories, from one culture to the next. With the relationship dialects theory, it is imperative to know the opposing motives or desires within an interpersonal relationship. Autonomy and connection are an example of one of the three opposing motives; you can wish to still be an independent person while also wanting to connect closely to another person and grow the relationship. People often worry that they will lose their identity if they become too involved with their partner. If you understand the relationship dialects theory, then you will be able to deal with these issues through the ways it
Location plays a continuously large role in long distance relationships. These couples “live in distal sites for days or weeks, reunite for a short time, and then separate again” (Pistole, C., Roberts, A., Mosko J. 2010). When conflicts arise the couples must be able to “strategically manage [their] conflicts” (Jiang, C. & Hancock, J. 2013), even though their locations are so distanced from one another. Scholars have researched the relationship between distance and conflicts, and with that, have came to the conclusion that, “geographic separation leads to restricted communication, reduced interdependence, and heightened uncertainty about the future of the relationship, all of which complicate relationship maintenance” (Jiang, C., & Hancock, J. 2013). Ongoing, long distance relationships are said to, today, to have a higher quality of communication and be more in love than those that have a close proximity (Maguire, K. & Kinney, T. 2010). Media has truly changed the way people communicate through distance, and with that, media allows college long distance romantic relationships to talk all the
Finding of Fact #1: With the addition of Simon Fester to the Lab Team it is evident from the start that there was workplace incivility from the senior members and Bob Knowlton. The members feel threatened by the knowledge level of Fester and his habit of speaking his mind and pointing out mistakes make by the existing team.