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How to help the domestic violence problem
How to help the domestic violence problem
Solving the problem of domestic violence
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Why I Believe IPV Occurs
Reflecting on all the information from this semester, IPV occurs due to a conscious decision made by the abuser to gain power and control. IPV perpetrators seek power and control because they believe that they must always get what they want from their partners through coercive behaviors. Perpetrators also believe that their actions are justifiable.
IPV is under no circumstance an anger management problem nor an alcohol or drug abuse problem. IPV is non-discriminatory, it affects people of all socioeconomic classes, race, ethnicity, level of education and sexual orientation. IPV can be described as any physical, sexual or psychological maltreatment and isolation from an intimate partner whether former or present.
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Perpetrators of IPV can be either male or female. Why Victims Stay and Leave Victims and survivors of IPV endure physical and psychological abuse at the hand of their abusers.
Many victims stay because they feel “trapped” in a relationship due to isolation caused by their partner. IPV is a pattern of abusive behavior that occurs over and over in the relationship and it can escalate and become more severe and dangerous. Victims may fear their abuser because of threats made against their families, children and even pets.
Victims of IPV are economically dependent on their abusers and fear they will not survive on their own. Let me not forget to mention love, victims stay because they have a deep love for their abusers, and they have hope that the situation will get better. Traditional and cultural values, stigma, shame and lack of resources can be other reasons not to leave the relationship.
Leaving an abusive relationship is the most dangerous time in a survivor’s life. Many victims who leave are still scared and always looking over their shoulder. I don’t believe anyone should have to live this way. Survivors strengths are hope, healing, resilience and personal qualities begin to be restored after escaping a violent relationship. Victims and survivors need safety plans and nonjudgmental support systems. I consider victims to be very brave.
IPV
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Perpetrators My perception of IPV perpetrators at the beginning of the semester included things such as anger issues and alcohol/drug abuse. I found out that this is not the reason they do things. Cultural and social values such as patriarchy can be attributed to IPV. Male control and dominance is a cultural value that is also attributed to IPV. I now know that personality disorders, childhood experiences, antisocial personalities, borderline personality and dependent personalities are also attributed to IPV perpetrators. There is a link between men’s childhood exposure to abuse and them becoming IPV perpetrators as adults. Characteristics of perpetrators are low self- esteem, grandiose personality, lack of consciousness and jealousy. IPV perpetrators can change. There are many programs that can educate and resocialize perpetrators. My belief has always been that perpetrators need to assume responsibility and be held accountable for their actions. Some of the interventions for perpetrators are cognitive behavioral intervention (CBT) and The Duluth Model of Batterer Intervention. The Effect of IPV The statistics are horrendous, even if it is only one victim, it is one victim too many.
IPV incidences occur too often in too short of a time frame. The impact it has on victims, survivors and their children’s mental, physical and overall health is detrimental. Children who witness this violence can often experience life lone effects such as poor performance in school, they are more fearful, aggressive, poor attention spans, depression, self-blame, trust issues and withdrawal. The physical effects can include being accident prone, they are ill more often than other children, have sleep disturbances and failure to
thrive. Personal Stories About Loved Ones At the beginning of the semester, I shared the stories of my mother and daughter enduring IPV. My understanding of why they stayed for so long makes sense to me now. I understood their dilemmas before, but now I see that they were another point on the statistical models. I love them and appreciate the fact that they put themselves at risk for the sake of their families. I now know that my daughter was abused because her husband threatened to kill her family. Her fear and her bravery to leave him still amazes me. My mother wanted to protect and keep her family together, she endured an enormous amount of psychological and physical abuse to keep her family together. Eventually they both escaped their abusive relationships and are now living healthier and productive lives. Community Beliefs and Involvement I believe that communities and society in general are becoming more aware of domestic violence. This became more evident to me when I heard the news report about Dr. Rendon-Santiago from San Antonio, Texas. The night she was killed, there were twenty- nine people who called 911 to report that there was a woman they feared was in danger. This showed me that educating society about IPV, their signs, symptoms and effects is having some impact in helping victims. My hope to continue to teach our communities about the IPV, making a difference one person at a time.
One of the reasons why IPV victims do not leave his or her abusers is due to isolation. This one of the any methods abusers use in order to achieve control over his or her victims. Abusers isolate the victim by cutting the victim's ties to any support system and resources. A support system includes family, friends, classmates, coworkers, and the government. Isolation is one of the many methods used in order to gain control over the victim’s life. In the autobiographical novel, I Am Not Your Victim: Anatomy of Domestic Violence, the author Beth Sipe discusses the domestic violence that she had suffered during her 16 year marriage. Sipe describes their “romance,” the abuse of power, Sam isolating her and her family, the confusion, the fear, the
Domestic Violence is a widely recognized issue here in the United States. Though many people are familiar with domestic violence, there are still many facts that people do not understand. Abuse is not just physical, it is mental, emotional, verbal, sexual and financial. Many victims of physical abuse are also fall victim to these abuse tactics as well. An abusive partner often uses verbal, mental, emotional, and financial abuse to break their partner so to speak. It is through this type of abuse the victim often feels as though they are not adequately meeting their partner’s needs.
The victims are blinded from the danger they are in because it is all they know in a relationship or feel it is their fault. Another reason victims do not leave their abusive spouse is fear (Rafenstein 6). The Article “How to Plan Escaping From An Abuser” says:
Women will continue to suffer from domestic violence unless there is some sort of intervention to help them. When dealing with this population, it is essential to create a safe environment where the woman can talk freely about the abuse without any retaliation from the abuser. When someone comes into a therapeutic session, everyone deserves to be treated with respect and care. This in turn will create a sense of hope that a different type of life can be possible. Also, knowing that there is a support system can help the woman begin the process of change. Despite this, the process of leaving the abusive partner is slow (Warshaw, n.d.)
In thinking about helping someone develop a safety plan in case they find themselves in an intimate partner violence or IPV situation, I turned to a woman I know that is soon to be married. The couple has had some quarrels that verge on verbal abuse off and on for the past year. Although none have resulted in physical violence, learning about intimate partner violence allows me to see aspects of relationships in a different light than I have seen them before. The potential victim with whom I have chosen to facilitate the safety plan does not consider her relationship to be abusive, nor do I. However, the victim, Crissy, could use a plan of action if the verbally abusive fights begin to take a physical nature. This reflection will include the summary of developing the safety plan, the issues the plan brought up, and the emotional reflection of both the victim and myself. It is important to note that all names have been changed for the sake of confidentiality.
An abused woman is always faced with a number of different choices from which she may consider, with regards to seeking help or ending the relationship with a variety of alternatives, the woman knows each decision involves a variety of risks. Time after time, the common question arises, “why doesn’t she just leave?” This question can be answered by analyzing the psychological effects domestic abuse has on women. Many women are unable to cope with the emotional and psychological stress of domestic abuse and resort to violence and extre...
Incidents of IPV are known to include four basic types of behavior, including: Physical abuse, which is when a person either hurts or attempts to hurt their partner by physical force. Sexual abuse is the forcing of an intimate partner to take part in a sexual act without the consent of that partner. Emotional abuse is the act of threatening a partner, his or her possessions or loved ones, or the harming of a partner’s sense of self-worth. Examples of emotional abuse include; stalking, name calling, intimidation, or not letting a partner see friends and family ("Understanding intimate partner," 2006).
Domestic Violence is a growing pandemic that influences every facet of our society and is deemed a national crisis by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (Breiding, Basile, Smith, Black, & Mahendra, 2015). 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men experience domestic violence during their lifetime (Black et al., 2011). The prevalence of IPV hastens the need for services, and conversely efficient service delivery and adequate access to these services. In 2013, approximately 36% of Virginia homicides were domestic violence related, a 4% increase from 2012. Victim's leaving the intimate partner relationship precipitated 21% of those cases (Office of the Attorney General and Department of Law, 2015). Virtually, means of safety
There exists a vast amount of literature that suggests that there is a connection between intimate partner violence and maladaptive outcomes for children. Studies have shown that children who witness violence undermine the children’s sense of security. Intimate partner violence (IPV) proves to be distressing and deregulating for the children victims of intimate partner violence. Not only is witnessing violence distressing for children, but it has also been shown that it can interfere with the deal with stressors and learn age-appropriate skills. While there have been many studies that show the effects of IPV on the development of children, there have not been studies that show how IPV can affect children’s memory skills.
It holds abusive men fully accountable for their violence and provides safety for victims of violence. However, many men who have perpetrated feel no sense of power and control in their lives (Dutton & Starzomski, 1994). The Duluth model deems interpersonal violence as a wilful exertion of male dominance over women to conform to the norms of society. In this view, the model does not assume that domestic violence is caused by mental or behavioural health problems, substance use, anger, stress, or previous victimisation.
...ip is to talk to someone you trust. There are multiple hotlines and support groups to help people get out of abusive relationships and recover from them. Many people may be unaware but there are laws against domestic violence.
The term "intimate partner violence" describes physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) by a current or former intimate partner. Examples of intimate partners include current or former spouses, boyfriends or girlfriends, dating partners, or sexual partners. IPV can occur between heterosexual or same-sex couples and does not require sexual intimacy.
Abuse has become so common that some people do not realize they are being abused. It is important that this topic is studied because there are many gaps of knowledge to what all an abusive relationship can entail. The goal is to help someone somewhere get out of an abusive relationship before its too late. Whether its emotional or physical abuse, neither is healthy for a person to maintain in. So seeking relationship advice from outside sources, such as popular press articles may be a usual for tool for people who are looking for insight as long as they know to check up on the research involved in the article. This paper will compare and contrast the findings from the article I have chosen to the scholarly research that has been conducted on abusive relationships.
It is not always easy to determine in the early stages of a relationship if one person will become abusive. Abusers may often seem wonderful and perfect initially, but gradually become more aggressive and controlling as the relationship continues. Violence and control always intensifies over time with an abuser, despite the apologies (ncadv.org). I Choose Life attempts to give a voice to the victims and survivors of domestic violence. Along with, offering an understanding to domestic violence, we construct educational seminars and programs that will help to drive that change. Domestic violence is the sole responsibility of the abuser.
Kennedy, Bernice R. Domestic Violence: A.k.a. Intimate Partner Violence (ipv). New York: iUniverse, 2013. Print.