Humorous Best Man Speech - The Groom’s Life Story
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. It’s surprising just how far some people are prepared to travel for a free lunch. It’s a good job the groom didn't choose the menu, otherwise we would have had penut-butter sandwiches washed down with beer.
Firstly, I have a feet messages to read out.(read telegrams etc.) As Bill Clinton said to each of his girlfriends, I wont keep you long.
I’d like to begin by thanking the groom for asking me to be best man. I would also like to thank the bride for allowing him to ask me. The groom has a splendid set of friends, and to be nominated from such esteemed company is without doubt a great honor. Thanks also to the ushers, friends, and family who have all helped to make this day so special.
(To the bride) You make a fine bride and look beautiful and radiant. I couldn't help but notice the groom swell with pride when he saw you walking clown the aisle in that dress. (To the groom) You are indeed a lucky man, you have married someone who is attractive, warm, loving and caring. A wife who
will be all you could ever wish for and more. (To the bride) You have married someone who is: handsome, witty, intelligent, charming, good looking... (To the groom) Sorry, I'm having trouble reading your writing.
When the groom asked me to be his best man, I consulted the Internet for help. I discovered that the job is essentially comprised of four main tasks:
1. Organize the stag party (bachelor party) - perhaps you could tell us again how you burst the inflatable sheep.
2. Help the groom dress (at last I found out where the G-string from Dublin went.)
3. See that all ex-girlfriends are kept at bay (quite a task as most of them have been released under care in the community.)
4. Make a speech. I thought it was going to be tough following a speech by the groom and I was right, I couldn't understand a single word he said.
I did find a lot of other interesting things on the Internet but I wont go into that now.
I met the groom over ten years ago, and I often wonder what it would be like if I didn't have him as a friend. Sometimes the smile lasts for days.
I have a large library of stories to tell you that will leave the groom embarrassed and humiliated, but out of respect for him on his big day I have decided not to tell them. So I'm not going to tell you about the time he vomited over a taxi driver's head or ended up in hospital on his stag do.
Gratitude is one of the positive emotions shown from research and clinical trials to enhance the general well being of human beings. Gratitude is defined by Emmons (2004) as “a sense of thankfulness and joy in response to receiving a gift, whether the gift be a tangible benefit from a specific other or a moment of peaceful bliss evoked by natural beauty. Emmons and McCullough also see gratitude as an attitude, a habit, a personality trait and a way of handling difficult situations response (Emmons & Stern, 2013).
Ladies and Gentlemen – I’ll start by thanking Brian on behalf of the bridesmaids for his kind words.
Fast food restaurants such as Burger King and McDonald’s, create advertisements where it urges people to consume their product. For example Mcdonald’s created a product where you can get two items such as a mcdouble and a medium fries for three dollars. According to “The battle against fast food begins at home”, by Daniel Weintraub, it shows how companies are intriguing their customers. “ The center blames the problem on the increasing consumption of fast food and soft drinks, larger portion sizes in restaurants and the amount of available on school campuses”(1).For the most part, the Center for Public Health believes that fast food companies are the problem for health
In the ideal of civil rights when it comes to being judged by race Americans have made huge steps in the right direction, but we still have miles and miles to go. A large source of the racism present in our society stems from one's pride in his or her own race. Many people, especially those associated with racist groups; find it necessary to put down other ethnic groups in an attempt to strengthen their own. This train of thought usually results in extreme hatred of other races and an overall sense of bigotry. Reasoning in this manner causes too many consider associating with racist groups. Many people believe that we have far left the KKK (Ku Klux Klan) in the past, but in my research I have learned sadly that is not the case there are eight active KKK tribes in Oklahoma alone. The KKK is just as violent as ever in Mississippi there is believed to have been twelve murders committed by the KKK in t...
It is customary for the best man to retell an embarrassing tale or two from the bridegroom’s past. As Gary’s oldest friend, this part of the speech fell to me. However, I had two problems with this. Firstly, Gary originally insisted on vetting the speech, which would have meant me going to the trouble of preparing two speeches. Luckily, he relented. Secondly, Gary is the original Mr. Nice Guy and it's very difficult to think of anything bad to say about him. So, back to you Steve!
As is customary I should leave the groom with wise words, to help in your marriage. Since I am a bachelor, I have little experience to speak from, but I hope these help anyway:
(1) Get the Groom to the Church sober and on time - well ladies and gentlemen I think you could all agree I have completed by first duty splendidly.
Let me first say that the bridesmaids look absolutely smashing today, and only rightly outshone by our bride, Pamela. And, I'm sure you'll agree with me gentlemen, today is a sad day for single men, as another beauty leaves the available list. And ladies, I'm sure you'll agree that today's passing by without much of a ripple.
Finally after what seemed like years, I walked out to greet my new father-in-law and my new wife. I shook his hands as he gave away his youngest daughter to start our own family, and then I reached out for the arm of my bride. Together we walked the rest of the way down the aisle and stood in front of the pastor’s
When I look at the bride and groom, I feel such a kaleidoscope of emotions. I know that Kari has found her true match and I know that theirs will be a marriage of long standing. My heart is bursting with love for you two today. I know you have a wonderful adventure ahead of you, and with God?s blessing your marriage will last for decades to come.
My journey of the process started with the PPI “Expressing Gratitude”. The task instructed to write down five things one is thankful for, each day, for a week. Wooh, Froh & Gerahty (2010) defined gratitude as a habit of noticing and being aw...
...e they want to be successful without taking such high risks that could take their business down hill if they taken a risk. For sure every entrepreneur knows every risk can be good, but can have a negative effect if taken the wrong way.
American life is quick paced and busy. Americans want quick reliable transportation, quick internet connection, quick money, quick healing, quick weight loss, quick energy, and even quick service from the restaurants they eat out at. When a busy person is looking for a quick, easy food, fast food is usually the best option. The main food at a fast food restaurant is usually a burger and French fries. Fast foods restaurants are popular in America because they are inexpensive and served very quickly. There’s no problem with eating fast food every so often, but if a person is eating it almost every day, it can lead to serious health concerns. Americans love to eat. However, it is important to understand that what goes into one’s mouth can affect the rest of the body. Fast food has brought a change into American lives. Hunting for food was once a full time job for humans. Today, such thoughts have become ancient. Food is delivered at the footsteps of your door. In addition, fast food's easy access has strongly contributed to the epidemic of obesity. Furthermore, the marketing of fast food through the media has become big business.
...t. Actually, this is the main reason why most people have fallen into its trap. Morrison also notes that some of the fast food products have special flavor that makes the consumers to be addicted. It is actually natural for human beings to be engaged in enjoyable activities.