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The effect of divorce on children
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Over the years divorce has become more of a problem in America. Many states are trying to pass bills to reduce the divorce rates in America. The covenant marriage bill encourages married couples that are thinking about divorcing to go through counseling before making their final decision. A divorce can affect children, the economy and religion. First of all, A divorce can be very difficult process to go through. It can affect children emotionally, mentally, and physically. “A no fault marriage can leave a women feeling vulnerable, harms the interest of children, undermines the general social welfare; at the very least, it is destructive of values of caring and commitment that produce stability of families” (Nock, Steven L., et al. 44). Covenant marriage strives to help with this situation. Covenant marriage is meant to help …show more content…
Even if counseling does not help the married couple it can help determine which parent is more capable to keep the child. Children are usually left with their mothers. “Women retain physical custody of children following ninety percent of divorces, and generally suffer a large drop in their standard of living after divorce. This decline hurts children directly, by reducing the resources available to them, and indirectly, by straining mothers psychologically” (Gordon 1440). Mothers have to work more to stay financially stable and take care of their kids. They are also emotionally hurt, so they might tend to avoid their children, which will make their children wonder what they did wrong. Children with divorced parents tend to not have as much resources as those who have married parents due to financial situation they are in. However not all children get affected by a divorce. Sometimes a divorce is better for a child that is an abusive home. Women can also get child support to help support their child, therefore she can be financially stable. Child support only brings up more problems, because sometimes the
Council on Families in America. "Divorce Harms Society." Marriage and Divorce. Eds. Tamara L. Roleff and Mary E. Williams. Current Controversies Series. Greenhaven Press, 1997. Excerpted from “Marriage in America: A Report to the Nation by the Council on Families in America,” March 1995. Rpt. by permission of the Institute for Family Values. Opposing Viewpoints Resource Center. Thompson Gale. 15 June 2005
It is rough on the child and causes their view of family to be damaged. Teenagers who experience one or more divorces are three times more likely to need psychological help within a year according to a study done by Peter Hill who studies adolescent development. Divorce is a confusing time for children. Some might think they did something to cause the divorce and wonder if they could’ve prevented it. The child will most likely carry around guilt of breaking up their parents, even if they had nothing to do with it. A study done of people whose parents divorced six years earlier showed that they were more lonely, unhappy, anxious, and insecure than those children who never experienced
The argument over how divorce affects children is one that has been going on for a very long time. Some people believe when parents get a divorce the children are not affected at all, while others believe when parents get a divorce the children are affected by the impact of divorce more than anyone in the family. In some cases, married couples can be in such a terrible marriage that divorce can in no way be avoided, and these divorces are usually the ones that children benefit from and are affected in a positive way. Many times though, a couple will choose to get a divorce because their marriage is not exactly the way it used to be, and they want that aspect of life back; these are the divorces that negatively affect children. Even though in some cases divorce does not affect children negatively, many times when parents obtain a divorce, the children are negatively harmed in many different ways that will forever change their lives.
Marriage is a commitment that seems to be getting harder to keep. The social standards placed on an individual by society and influenced by the media inevitably lead some to consider divorce as a “quick-fix” option. “Have it your way” has become a motto in the United States. It has become a country without any consideration of the psychological effects of marriage and divorce. The overwhelmingly high divorce rate is caused by a lack of moral beliefs and marital expectations.
Overall, joint custody has a positive impact in the mental health of children that are affected by divorce, which dramatically decreases when those children are not placed in a joint custody agreement.
Divorce is a very common word in today's society. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, "divorce is the legal dissolution of a marriage or a complete or radical severance of closely connected things"(Pickett, 2000). This dissolution of marriage has increased very rapidly in the past fifty years. In 1950 the ratio of divorce to marriage was one in every four; in 1977 that statistic became one in two. Currently one in every two first marriages results in divorce. In second marriages that figure is considerably higher, with a 67% average (National Vital Statistics Report, 2001). One critical aspect of divorce is often not taken into consideration: How it affects children. Every year 1.1 million children are affected by divorce (Benjamin, 2000). Children from divorce or separation often exhibit behavioral and long-term adjustment problems (Kelly, 2000). Throughout this paper I will discuss divorces effects on children at different age levels, how they react, and what can be done to help them.
Children can suffer from, fear, grief, anger, depression, shame, sadness, anxiety, embarrassment, self-blame, abandonment, and many other things. (Borden, 2015). There is no guarantee that if a child goes through a divorce that they will experience any or all of these things and there is no guarantee that they would not experience these things if a divorce did not happen as well. A divorce definitely would not help the child in this area and it would be in the best interest of the parents for a divorce to not happen if children were
A lot of children tend to develop “normally” with two married parents. Others don’t develop the same. To me, children who go through divorce don’t develop normally. My parents are no longer together and I thought I turned out okay. I have social skills, friends, and a close relationship with both my parents. On the other hand, I believe some children or teenagers have a difficult time developing when going through the process of a divorce. It could lead to trust issues, make the kids feel alone, change the perspective on marriage, and affect the way they communicate.
Divorce isn’t always as bad as people portray it. Commonly realized, divorce isn’t a great thing to happen to a family. But being in a bad relationship can have more negative effects on a child than divorce. In a study conducted of 98 couples, that later divorced, 80% of their children felt that their parents split was a good decision. Of the 20% that felt it wasn’t a good decision, most came from more abusive families. Being together in a bad relationship can actually cause more harm than good. Parents commonly think that by staying together for the kid’s sake will it eliminate negative effects and help their kids thrive. Nevertheless they see their parents unhappiness creating a more tense environment. Provided that the parents are abusive or are more vocal about their opinions then it can actually create a traumatic environment around the child, making them feel unsafe or timid constantly. What the minority of people know is that divorce can actually give kids positive vibes. Divorce can teach kids to focus on the positives and keep moving forward in life. In a Harper Collins book it says (We’re still family: What grown Children have to say about their parents divorce) that “ kids more commonly emerge wiser in spite of- or perhaps because of- their complex histories.” Multiple studies have proven, kids who have experienced divorce emerge mo...
Another cause that affects a child with divorced parents is that the child may have a more stressful life. The child may have to change schools with any move that may result from the divorce. Also, if the child is not old enough to take care of himself or herself and the now single parent works, the child would probably have to start attending a child care program. A child could have to alternate between parents in different houses which is also very hard on a child. The adjustments to different settings and what days he or she is at which house can be confusing and stressful.
Marriage is no longer taken seriously; commitment and monogamy are no longer an essential ingredient. For most couples today, it’s not even considered a part of marriage. The negative effects that divorce has on children should be the number one consideration when a couple hits that hard time in their relationship. Children are psychologically and socially affected by divorce and may need counseling either at the time of their parent’s divorce or in the future. They may react instantly by getting lower grades or becoming depressed or anxious.
Children that have divorced parents are more likely to divorce in their own marriages later in life. They might also tend to resent one or both of their parents for putting them through the strain of having a separated family. Problems can arise in families when the
So, in conclusion, divorce is very bad for children. It ruins their lives and happiness. Losing a parent destroys a child emotionally, mentally and even academically. They would rather live with both parents because both of them are an important part of their lives. Two parents are better than one!
Mental effects can get so harmful they have to get help from a therapist or even a medicine doctor. “Working with mediators getting the entire family into family therapy; getting the divorcing couple to go to couples therapy to do ‘uncoupling’ therapy and/or sending the children or adolescents for individual therapy are all great ways to assure good mental and physical health for the children. Sometimes, medication or alternative medicine could also benefit the children of divorce”
The problem with divorce is that the marriage is supposed to be a contract that is supposed to last until someone in the couple dies; only then is the sacred vow broken. Otherwise, the couple is going against God's will. Defying God is not the only detrimental effect, however. More marriages in the United States end in divorce than in any other country in the world, and it can be seen throughout America's history.