Accepting Haitian Culture In Caroline's Wedding

Although Ma and Grace value Haitian culture in “Caroline’s Wedding,” Ma is more traditional and has a hard time accepting American culture, while Grace is more accepting to American culture.

In “Caroline’s Wedding,” both Ma and Grace respect their Haitian culture. Ma, Grace, and Caroline take a cab home from Eric’s house, who is Caroline’s fiancé. While in the cab, Ma advises Caroline, “‘We know people by their stories,’...‘Gossip goes very far. Grace heard women gossip in the Mass behind us the other day, and you hear what they say about Haitian women who forget themselves when they come here. Value yourself’” (Danticat 185). Ma does not want her daughter to forget her Haitian heritage, not only because she might be gossiped by others,

but because Haitian heritage is something she should always have with her and never forget.

She wants Caroline to pride herself in it, and even though she is in America, she should value her Haitian aspects and herself. In a similar manner, Grace demonstrates respect for her Haitian culture. Earlier in the story, Ma proposes that Grace and Caroline come along with her to Sunday Mass. Grace goes, but Caroline does not. While they are at church, Grace recounts, "The altar boys stood in an arc around the priest as he recited a list of a hundred twenty-nine names, Haitian refugees who had drowned at sea that week. The list was endless and with each name my heart beat faster, for it seemed as though many of those listed might have been people that I had known at some point in my life" (167). By Grace going along with her mother to church, she conveys that she is still connected to her culture, where religion is an important aspect. As the names of the deceased refugees are named, she slowly becomes distressed. She does not know these people personally, but hearing their names makes her feel connected to them because they are all Haitian. They are

people who died trying to find a better life, for example in the United States, and she can’t help but feel like this since she was able to get there, even though it was under different circumstances.

In the short story, Ma is more traditional and has a hard time accepting American culture, while Grace is more accepting to American culture.

Ma, who is from Haiti, does not like that her younger daughter, Caroline, who was born in America, is marrying outside of her ethnicity. While Grace is with her sister, she thinks, “Ma wanted Eric to officially come and ask her permission to marry her daughter. She wanted him to bring his family to our house and have his father ask her blessing...Ma wanted a full-blown church wedding. She wanted Eric to be Haitian” (Danticat 169). Eric does not do what a typical Haitian would do, and instead goes about the marriage in an American way. This causes Ma to disapprove of the marriage. She wants her family to stay within tradition, not to follow American customs, since she is accustomed to life in Haiti, where it is homogenous. On the other hand, Grace, who is also from Haiti, is more accepting to the marriage between her sister and Eric, and has a discussion with her mom about it, voicing, “‘Maybe she jumps at it because she thinks he is being noble. Maybe she thinks he is doing her a favor. Maybe she thinks he is the only man who will ever come along to marry her.’ ‘Maybe he loves her,’ I said. ‘Caroline should not marry a man if that man wants to be noble by marrying Caroline.’ ‘We don’t know that, Ma’” (194). Grace is defending her sister and the marriage, showing it doesn’t matter to her whether her sister’s fiance is Haitian or not.

Grace has lived in both Haiti and America, so she has a split view on the matter, which is why she can understand her sister more. Even though Ma and Grace cherish their Haitian culture very much in “Caroline’s Wedding,” their different perspectives on American culture differentiates them.