The Day Before I Went To The Mental Hospital I Wrote: What Makes Me Curl Up In A Ball: A List Of Sorts By Jason Bartlett God protect the young angel. I can tell that some people have never felt real happiness. They have just felt money, and the joy of greed. I'm not afraid to show you off, I'm afraid to show myself. I see the world through the eyes of a newborn. As we get older we become more conscious of others being aware of us. Eventually we just fade away. I never touch my face because it feels like my beard will fall off. Things I can never be, bumblebee in my mind, keep me awake at white collar dawn. Someone said that I write love poems even though the love shatters into a million pieces, the seeds of which make flowers grow, but yet, I write anyway. I haven't been to any of the places the wind blew them, And I don't think I ever will go. Even if I was stuck in a dungeon, I'd find a crayon box and make art. I wish someone would ask me what each verse means, before I forget. I think I stay up at night so the future comes quicker. Everytime I take off my belt, I know it holds my jeans up. Only, I must have a real odd idea of how the world works because of the movies. I feel like nothing I do has an end. What is the end? What is living? If everyone has their own definition of living, why does it feel like I could die tomorrow? Will people at my funeral say, "He really lived. He knew how to live."? I keep waiting for somebody to show me how to live, or at least love my life. I don't want to live for somebody else. I miss swimming, and how tired and hungry it made my muscles feel. I keep dreaming of being allowed in the boys locker room and what it would be like to wear the proper uniform. I never go to do it, and I dream o thin... ... middle of paper ... ...ds me of being alone in a tall lifeguard chair as music played in the distance bouncing off silent sand. The people in your drawings look like empty white ghosts, I think that's exactly what the city population looks like. Hollow whited out people. Your number on a napkin like Beatles lyrics on a flightless cancelled day because there was snow covered up to our hearts. And the way your letters dip shows you are an artist. That not even the alphabet can hold you back. And I wish I could be like that. The old man in the taxi didn't say a word, after an evening full of letter boxes. I wonder if everyone is just as intrigued by others listening to lips speak. I want to know the secret of fame, keep it once and give it away. To cold outside for a flame, too cold to have any habits at all. I know I am somebody now, just not sure I'll have something to show for it someday.
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Because of this I thought about the specific styles that would influence my work very carefully. In dance and sport, films that exhibit athleticism on screen the audience experiences embodiment of some kind that occurs due to the lack of touch (between screen and viewer), the spectator must fill in the gaps (Rutherford, 235). I considered what genres or stylistic choices, could encourage embodiment in some form or another and therefore empathy in the audience. The decision to manifest feeling as a real being was key, but as part of this I thought it necessary to include elements of body horror - physical empathy for a characters position. Seeing a character move in a particular way, whether that be through dance, or sport, or injury creates empathy because of the familiriality it has to our own bodies. We imagine ourselves in the position of the performer to varying extents, mild body horror is a way to access uncomfort - an essential element of feeling anxiety so bad that forms of physical pain exist, whether that be a heavy chest, or picking at nails, or something more
Human sex research has made great advancements in recent years, however, there remains misconceptions that have yet to be completely exposed. A topic that falls under this category, but is still surrounded by stigma, is masturbation. In the past, mainly beginning in the 18th century, medical professionals began to claim that masturbation could have serious mental and physical health consequences. At that time, masturbation was considered to be immoral and was believed that it could lead to insanity, and even death. Yet, there was no scientific evidence to support these claims. With most cases, the evidence was only based on testimonies of supposed individuals suffering due to compulsive masturbation; even today there remains no evidence that masturbation is wrong or dangerous (Kaestle, 2011). Although many individuals retain negative attitudes toward masturbation, evidence suggests that these beliefs and attitudes are only common myth. The stigma that is associated with masturbation is often opposed with the commonality as well as the numerous benefits that can be attributed to it. Since masturbation is a natural behavior and can provide a safe sexual outlet, serve as a therapeutic treatment for sexual disorders and a method for self-discovery; it should be considered beneficial sexual act.
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Masturbation is extremely common between young people. About 60% of all men masturbate, and about 40% of all females masturbate (Organization of Sexuality, 1994). When excluding everyone that is not at a sexually active age (we’ll just say senior citizens) this is a definite majority! Why in the world is masturbation so taboo in a world of people dominated by the pastime?
The list starts with number ten, and appears to be in descending order, i.e. number ten is good, number five would be better, and number one is the best. At the top of the list is to blindfold her; by doing this it provides her other senses better awareness, and in turn, providing her with a better sexual experience. Giving her instructions is number nine. This does not necessarily mean to tell her what to do, but learn what works and what does not in the sexual relationship. One of the most relaxing, and also one of the most sexual things one can do for their partner is giving them a sensual massage (Leigh), and due to this information, massage is number eight. Seven consists of having her dress up and acting or pretending to be someone, or something, different (role playing). Sharing fantasies with her is number six; use of imagination and “keeping it sexy” (Leigh) is a fun game that can heighten sexual