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Negative effects of divorce on children
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One of the big adversities I have encountered was when my parents got a divorce. They got divorced when I was three years old. This hardship made me become more independent and hardworking. My dad had left my mom and I to raise my baby brother. He was only one years old when our father left. My mom had been working long hours and I always helped take care of my brother. Another adversity that I had went through was my dad lying to me all my life. Five years ago on Father's day I found out he was cheating on my step mom at the time. The father I thought I had was not even considered my father anymore. To this day I still do not consider him as my father. We talk here and there, but not much. My dad was the first man that ever broke my heart.
During military service, I experienced domestic violence for a minimum of nine years while being married to another military service member. In January of 1988 during military service and marriage, I also gave birth to my second son, who died three day after being born. Although many people may find themselves in complicated situations, I never thought that I would be one of those individuals. During this period of fear, pain, and sadness, I dealt with the situation the best I knew how, because I had military responsibilities, parent responsibilities to my first born son who was six years old at the time, and while still trying to keep my family together. I quickly found other means of managing my experience with both situations by convincing
I had to learn to adjust life without my sibling because my mom did not have enough money for them to be with us and adapt to a new culture. During this my mother and I ended up homeless during the winter months, this was the most brutal and embarrassing time of our life. In my teenage life I have overcome many obstacles; Even though we were living in poverty my mother had high expectation for her children and graduating from high school was just the beginning unfortunately I stumble again, I failed my Math Regent and did not graduate but I was determined not to be discouraged .
Everyone has difficult obstacles in their lives. I have had a few myself and they each have changed me for the better. My most profound experience was being repeatedly molested as a child. I wasn't aware of exactly what was happening to me. I didn't know being touched was wrong. I just knew how disgusting it made me feel, but I didn't tell anyone at the time. I shared this publicly as an adult to help other parents realize that children need to be protected. It was a long journey to reach to the point where I could speak about my experiences with anyone. These experiences from my childhood affected me deeply; however, I have overcome them, learned from them and I have contributed at a higher level because of them.
1. The Corporative Parenting Institute of Georgia (CPI). Their goal is to recognize the unique needs of separating families. They offer:
“Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.”
In life we all face obstacles. The troubles that we face don’t define us, how we overcome the situation is what makes us the people we are today. Throughout my life I have faced many trials and tribulations that I had to overcome with the help of my mother, ofcourse. I was smooth sailing in life until I started high school.
The Surviving spouse or successor trustee may also transfer as much of the deceased spouses other separate property or share of the community property to such subtrust as the surviving spouse or successor trustee deems appropriate, in his or her absolute discretion, to achieve the greatest economic value for the surviving spouse and our children, taking into account the relevant tax code provisions in place at the time of the first death.
An absence of a parent or a parent’s separation, divorce, when a child is developing, may affect the child’s future relationships. “Evidence shows that, on average, children who have experienced parental divorce score somewhat lower than children in first-marriage families on measures of social development, emotional well-being, self-concept, academic performance, educational attainment, and physical health” (Demo, Supple)
It was the last Saturday in December of 1997. My brother, sister, and I were chasing after each other throughout the house. As we were running, our parents told us to come and sit down in the living room. They had to tell us something. So, we all went down stairs wondering what was going on. Once we all got down stairs, the three of us got onto the couch. Then, my mom said, “ Well…”
Divorce is an emotionally painful experience for everyone involved, especially toward the children in the family. But yet, the law officials continue fabricating laws and devising regulations to make it harder for spouses seeking a divorce or separation to get one. The family has to deal with child custody and support, spousal support such as counseling, property distribution, and a possible name change. Divorce is not only a financial struggle for the families involved, but it is also a nuisance between family relationships.
I am a kaleidoscope of my mother’s committed recklessness and my father’s wayfaring humanity. I am the random chaos between humility and self-love, between Sikhism and clouded judgment, between yesterday and tomorrow.
Our official journey began on August 2, 1997 in Las Vegas. That was our wedding day and my official entry into married life. Tim and I said, ?I do? in Clark County, Nevada. The clerk declared us 'best friends for life' in a ceremony with just the two of us. That declaration was more profound and welcomed than one any priest could have made.
Bridget Burke Ravizza wrote the article, “Selling Ourselves on the Marriage Market” and is an assistant professor of religious studies at St. Norbert College, De Pere, WI. After talking with an unnamed group of college students, she discovers that “These college students have grown up in a society in which nearly half of all marriages end in divorce.” She also reveals “they are fearful that their future marriages will go down that path, and some question whether lifelong commitment can—or should—be made at all.” Furthermore, Ravizza finds that “students are bombarded with messages about sexuality and relationships—indeed messages about themselves—that seem to undermine authentic relationships.” Simply put, culture has accepted divorce as a “normal” thing and has already begun to affect the next generations. The surveyed students are so fearful of divorce, they are, in essence, afraid of marriage as well. They even go to the extreme of avoiding divorce by saying they may not get married at all to prevent the “undermining of an authentic relationship.”
Something that I really struggled with was the passing of my Grandmother. She was a strong woman and an inspiration to everybody in my family. I think that I struggled with it because she was a great human being, I kind of looked up to her a bit, and of course she was part of my family. I think that along with her passing, I struggled with the fact that she died when I thought that she did nothing wrong in her entire life and did not deserve to die. Mainly the fact that she was a really good person and she just died like that.
It was dark that night, I was nervous that this dreadful day was going to get worse. Sunday, October 23, 1998 I wanted to start writing this to tell about the weird things i’m starting to see in this new neighborhood. Gradually I keep seeing pots and pans on the sink suddenly move to the floor. I would ask my sister but she is out with my mom and dad getting the Halloween costumes. When they got home I didn’t tell them what I saw because i've seen Halloween movies and I have to have dissimulation otherwise the ghost will come out and get me first. October 24, 1998 I think I got a little nervous yesterday with the whole ghost thing. 12:32pm, Went to eat lunch with the family today and I go to get my coat. I heard the words furious and madness,