Humorous Wedding Speech

Good evening ladies and gentlemen of the United Kingdom. That you are watching this means I am deceased. I’m unsure of when the public will view this but I felt that conveying my side of the story was imperative. I have come to learn rather recently, and this is a hard thing for me to admit, but my mind is deteriorating and I want to have the final word and explain why I made the decisions I did… before I can’t anymore.

People have always voiced their opinions about me; usually bad, and ever since I got into politics I have been mocked, lampooned and derided. I was frequently referred to as the ‘Iron Lady’ due to my uncompromising style and staunch opposition to the Soviet Union and socialism. But I can’t help thinking that much of the hostility to me was because I am a woman. A man might be applauded for his toughness but I got pilloried for my lack of femininity and there is no doubt in my mind that, had I been a man my opinions and strategic suggestions would have been held in higher regard. Should I hold the interest of the British people in any less regard because I am a woman? It was as if my critics expected me to pursue weaker

Oddly enough its because of what I believe is one of Great Britain’s biggest successes that was created through my closing of the uneconomic mines. Growing up as a grocer’s daughter there were definitely times that we had cash-flow tribulations, so I understood why this controversial decision created such uproar in the lower socio-economic areas. With the man commonly being the main breadwinner of the family, I assumed and appreciated the desperation and struggle that so many families would face in order to improve this country. Yes, I closed 20 mines and 20,000 people lost their job because of that. I’m sorry for the hardship that it caused people! But the fact of the matter is that the coal mining industry had been in crisis for decades, crippled by excessive costs and international