You Will Be Fine

1811 Words4 Pages

My head is spinning. My stomach is twisted in knots with a mixture of emotions: anxiety, excitement, worry, hope, terror, longing and love. Love I did not know I could feel. The day has finally arrived. Patience is not one of my attributes but I have been patient, more than you can imagine. Anticipation overwhelms me. Ages I have been waiting and to think I am only moments away… The room is at the end of the long silent corridor, with each second that passes I am closer, closer to your fate and my fate. But, I do not want to get closer. I want to run but there is no chance. I want you desperately but not this way. I am petrified as the double doors loom ahead of me. Tears streak my face glistening in the dull light. I wipe them away. I have to be strong. You are the answer that’ll make everything perfect. There was a way out. I didn’t follow it. I thought they were wrong, I thought it was not true. I hoped they are wrong, I hope it is not true. I still don’t know though. The double doors tower above me, as I get closer, they are calling my name softly, embracing me silently. Entering the room I feel an icy chill down my spine and goose bumps on my arm, I can’t help but imagine death calling me, soul hungry. The room is large and immaculate. People surround me but still I feel isolated. I am isolated. I have no one. Yet. I am reminded of the procedures I will undergo but I cannot comprehend the words spoken. Trembling I open my mouth to speak but no sound is uttered. A piece of cloth covers my view and I feel an awkward sensation on my abdomen. Minutes pass away with only the clicking of metal equipments filling the silence and the odd footstep. A knife pierces my skin causing pain beyond b... ... middle of paper ... ...h while I try to comfort you. A velvet blanket has disguised the truth. I tell you that any minute the pain will stop that if you let me hold you close in my arms everything will disappear. I wake up each day hoping for a miracle. My eyes are never dry, my heart is numb it has no feeling. I need you to rescue me from the dark place I have fallen in. The smell of toast wafts up through the slightly ajar door making me nauseous. The empty sensation I had before I met you has gone you have filled my hunger. The desire and fixation I felt for Jamie vanished the moment I saw you and reality struck me hard. I can only apologise for my vindictive actions full of envy that have caused you, Jamie and Stacey so much pain but I know words will never be enough. The only way to show I am truly remorseful would be to wind time back but that can never happen.

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