Eulogy for Son

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Eulogy for Son

I'd like to thank you all for the outpouring of support and condolences on the loss of my beautiful son Adam. My entire family appreciates it. This is my eulogy to Adam:

Depression is a terrible disease. Adam suffered so much with a disease that often goes unrecognized as very serious, or even as a disease, but is often fatal. Many people who meet someone like Adam think all he needs is tough love - how wrong they are.

To those who have never had this disease, you cannot imagine how frightening the demons are, how they take over your life, your every thought, your every action. There is no respite within the mind; it is constantly on overdrive.

Doctors have few clues as to how to treat this. Lord knows how many doctors, tests, psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers we've seen. Adam was hospitalized at least three times and lived in a residential therapeutic facility for seven months. He tried every anti-depressant drug available. He spent another year in the military.

The National Guard and Air Force were brief respites from his torments. He excelled at both and became a poster soldier for the National Guard. He received an honorable discharge from the Air Force. But, in the long run, the military was ill-equipped to deal with the disease.

Despite his disease Adam had passions, passions for hockey, for music, for his family. He worked out three days a week and studied to better himself.

His sense of humor was infectious; he saw the world differently and would always see the irony in life. On Monday driving to the airport after the Super Bowl he saw a gun shop and a hospital next-door. Once at a New Jersey Devils hockey game he seemed the only one shocked by the scoreboard message: "Devils welcome the Churches of NJ." He'd always noticed the contradictions in life. But, he was always his own worst critic - never able to bask in his successes with the military, getting his GED, scoring a 3-point basket, getting a goal in hockey or fixing complex computer problems.

He emulated his brother, David, but disease got in the way. He loved his sister, Deena, more than anything, but was rarely able to show it. They, in turn, loved him dearly - a better brother and sister there's never been. For that matter, a better mother there's never been.

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"Eulogy for Son." 23 Jun 2018
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Adam fought for his life as an infant with three surgeries in his first year. My wife, Daria, not his biological mother, nursed him when Deena was born six weeks after Adam's birth. Medical professionals hailed his recovery as a miracle. Mother's milk was the only food he'd take and retain. But we don't know what scars that first year brought, or the genetics, predispositions, or prenatal care of his birth mother. This will remain a mystery, but I'm convinced they all played a part.

Whenever there was a break from his illness, he was the most loving, appreciative son anyone could want. He was affectionate and loving. We received the most wonderful letters when he was in the Air Force. He told Daria and me how much he loved us, how much he appreciated us. Those moments we will always treasure.

Adam, I hope and pray you have finally found peace from your demons, from your torment. We love you more than the energy of the world. Our baby, please rest.

We love you always, Daddy and Mommy, David and Deena

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