Parental Control vs. Guidance in Joy Luck Club
The novel, "Joy Luck Club," by Amy Tan describes the struggle between a dominate mother who tries to protect her daughter, Ni kan, from the devastating losses that she suffered by convincing her that she might become anyone she wants to be. Ni kan resents her mother's control and wishes only to be herself. The author clearly illustrates in this novel that parents cannot control their children's lives; they can only guide them in the right direction and let them make their own decisions.
First of all, Amy Tan shows that Ni kan's mother attempted to dominate and control her daughter's life. The mother does this by telling Ni kan that "'. . . you can be prodigy, too'" (Tan 491) and insisting that she work toward this goal. Ni kan is then sent down a path of endless tests and lessons. These include tests on capitals of the states; multiplying numbers in her head; finding the queen of hearts in a deck of cards; trying to stand on her head without using her hands; predicting the daily temperatures in Los Angeles, New York, and London; and looking at a page from the Bible for three minutes and reporting everything that she remembers (Tan 492).
Although Ni kan quickly loses interest of her mother's dream of being a prodigy, her mother persists. She arranges for Ni kan to take piano lessons. Her mother does not ask her if she wants to play the piano or to explore another art form. She arranges a complete schedule of lessons and practices that take over not only her daughter's physical existence but also dominate Ni kan's thoughts for most of her free time. Her mother wants to control not only her actions but also her dreams and aspirations, and she will not tolerate disobedience. She clearly says that "Only one kind of daughter can live in this house. Obedient daughter" (Tan 497).
Amy Tan shows that Ni kan resents her mother's decisions and resists her control. After many failed tests in knowledge and skills, Ni kan asserts to herself, "I won't let her change me. . ." (Tan 492). This clearly shows a child resisting parental domination and control. The piano lessons evokes a response of "...I felt like I was being sent to hell" (Tan 493).
"When a trout rising to a fly gets hooked on a line and finds himself unable to swim about freely, he begins with a fight which results in struggles and splashes and sometimes an escape. Often, of course, the situation is too tough for him."
Amy Tan, in ?Mother Tongue,? Does an excellent job at fully explaining her self through many different ways. It?s not hard to see the compassion and love she has for her mother and for her work. I do feel that her mother could have improved the situation of parents and children switching rolls, but she did the best she could, especially given the circumstances she was under. All in all, Amy just really wanted to be respected by her critics and given the chance to prove who she is. Her time came, and she successfully accomplished her goals. The only person who really means something to her is her mother, and her mother?s reaction to her first finished work will always stay with her, ?so easy to read? (39).
One could argue that the mothers’ trials don’t equate to modern times and the Western world. However, making that assumption would discredit the connection that is evident between the generations. Rather, the mothers’ experiences translate quite well, lending them greater insight into their daughters than their daughters could hope to know. At its core, The Joy Luck Club, by Amy Tan, shows that shared pieces of culture and experiences transcend not just borders, but generations.
Jing-mei realizes her mother was trying to help her out, but since their personalities clash, Jing-mei first believed her mother was forcing her to play piano. She thought her mother was setting up unrealistic expectations for her, when only she just wanted to see her daughter live the American Dream. She didn’t understand the Chinese way of thinking so she thought her mother was just being strict. Her mother wants her to be a strong, independent American woman. She just wanted her daughter to have all the opportunities she wasn’t able to have in China.
The mother-daughter relationship is often complex and confusing. Amy Tan explores this relationship with novel The Joy Luck Club narrated by four daughters and three mothers: Jing-mei Woo, Rose Hsu Jordan, Lena St. Clair, Waverly Jong, An-mei Jordan, Ying-Ying St. Clair, and Lindo Jong. June narrates in her late mother's place. The mothers talk about their difficult pasts in China and how they have been changed. The trauma from their past causes their daughters not to be able to connect to . The women are finally able to connect to each other. The women are forced to learn from the past, overcome adversity, and learn to understand one another.
Throughout the novel, The Joy Luck Club, author Amy Tan explores the issues of tradition and change and the impact they have on the bond between mothers and daughters. The theme is developed through eight women that tell their separate stories, which meld into four pairs of mother-daughter relationships.
Her parents couldn’t find proper way to learn English so they relied on her to do so. Anaisa tells how she had to give up a lot of the fun things she did to learn as much as she could. She would go to school, and after she would have to attend afterschool learning programs to get practice with this new language. Also had to attend evening classes from Monday to Thursday to get an even better understanding of this new language and customs. She really wanted to do other things of course, but she cared about her family more than anything. She explains that the process of learning was very hard because English is a very complicated language to learn, from the writing to the pronunciations to how to use the words properly. It was all a living hell for such a young
In the novel The Joy Luck Club, Amy Tan portrays the effects of childhood events on the roles and attitudes of the present lives each character must face. Particularly, Lena St. Clair felt restricted by her mother as she shields her from the dangers of the outside world. Consequently, when Lena did face trouble, she was unable to fight back and saw evil in everything she saw. Furthermore, the constant conflict that arose from the male superiority in Ying-Ying’s marriage and her miscommunications with her husband influenced Lena’s present behavior. Instead of expressing her own concerns, Lena allows her husband to make major decisions. Influenced by her childhood experiences and the troubles of the marriage between her parents, Lena inherits a passive role in her relationship to Harold.
Throughout Amy Tan’s novel, The Joy Luck Club, the reader can see the difficulites in the mother-daughter relationships. The mothers came to America from China hoping to give their daughters better lives than what they had. In China, women were “to be obedient, to honor one’s parents, one’s husband, and to try to please him and his family,” (Chinese-American Women in American Culture). They were not expected to have their own will and to make their own way through life. These mothers did not want this for their children so they thought that in America “nobody [would] say her worth [was] measured by the loudness of her husband’s belch…nobody [would] look down on her…” (3). To represent everything that was hoped for in their daughters, the mothers wanted them to have a “swan- a creature that became more than what was hoped for,” (3). This swan was all of the mothers’ good intentions. However, when they got to America, the swan was taken away and all she had left was one feather.
One day everything is going great, in fact things could not be better and then you say something and your friend turns to you and says “oh my god, you sounded just like your mother”. That is when you freak out and think to yourself it is true I am turning into my mother. This is every daughters worst nightmare come true. When a young girl is growing up her mother always says and does things that the girl vows she will never say and do but she does. Very rarely do we see cases of women wanted to be like their mother but it usually happens even if they do not want it to. In the book The Joy Luck Club by Amy Tan tells stories of four Chinese immigrant mothers and their relationships with the American born daughters. In this novel, Tan shows us the struggle these mothers face in teaching their American daughters about their heritage. Throughout the novel it becomes evident that the daughters feel it is important to learn about their history and develop stronger relationships with their mothers
In her short story "Two Kinds," Amy Tan utilizes the daughter's point of view to share a mother's attempts to control her daughter's hopes and dreams, providing a further understanding of how their relationship sours. The daughter has grown into a young woman and is telling the story of her coming of age in a family that had emigrated from China. In particular, she tells that her mother's attempted parental guidance was dominated by foolish hopes and dreams. This double perspective allows both the naivety of a young girl trying to identify herself and the hindsight and judgment of a mature woman.
Overall, each mother in The Joy Luck Club went through something emotionally exhausting and saddening in her life. The mothers use their experiences to try to direct the course of their daughters' lives, to make them simpler and more carefree. Initially, however, the daughters only see that their mothers want to make decisions for them, not to help them. Ultimately, the daughters realize their mothers' intentions, but not all accept them. The important thing, however, is that each daughter learns a valuable lesson and comes to peace with her mother.
First, the old man receives outer success by earning the respect and appreciation of the boy and the other fishermen. The boy is speaking to the old man in his shack after the old man’s long journey, “You must get well fast for there is much that I can learn and you can teach me everything” (Hemmingway 126). The boy appreciates the fact that the old man spends time to teach him about fishing. He respects him a great deal for he knows that the old man is very wise and is a magnificent fisherman. The fellow fishermen also show respect towards the old man as they note the size of the fish after the old man returns home, “What a fish it was, there has never been such a fish” (123). The men admire the fact that the old man has caught the biggest fish that they have seen. Many fishermen resented Santiago at first, however their opinion changed once they realized what the old man has gone through. Being admired by others plays a major role in improving one’s morale.
The Joy Luck Club, written by second-generation Amy Tan, is a collection of stories written in the perspectives of four mothers and four daughters. Although there are various short stories in one novel, it relates to one theme of the conflict between the first and second generation. The second generation argues “That parents shouldn’t criticize children. They should encourage instead.---And when you criticize, it just means you’re expecting failure” (Tan 31), as the first generation answers, “You never rise. Lazy to get up. Lazy to rise to expectations”(Tan 31). As a second generation Asian American, the thought process of June Woo is incredibly similar to how I feel, yet placed in a mature manner. As a teenager, it is hard to process one’s feelings because of puberty, hormones and scientific phenomena that I can not explain. However, it could also be the lack of conservation and communication between young adults and adults themselves. My parents have the highest expectations: getting straight A’s, having my back straight, being the top of my class and many more I do not want to list. As previously stated before, most of my childhood I lived in Anaheim which was not the most academically challenging district; being top of my class was a piece of cake. Unfortunately moving to Irvine, that was not necessarily the case. Irvine was showered with
The difficult struggle of finding true identities ate the energy of these young women. “The Joy Luck Club” by Amy Tan is about a group of young mothers and their daughters having issues with their identities as Chinese women in an American world. The establishment the women created became The Joy Luck Club. Throughout everyone’s stories, many lessons were learned. The Chinese women often faced the issue of not being able to accept their identities. As well as not being able to find their identities: it became lost in the hype of all the judgment of others. As the women dealt with these problems, they also bonded as a group.