A Dummies' Guide to Women

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A Dummies' Guide to Women

Since the beginning of time (or so it seems) the human male has been known to spend hours contemplating the complexities of the female mind. Prehistoric man would sit on his rock, hands folded against the chin, with the all too familiar look of complete confusion and bewilderment, as he tried to understand what it was exactly that the prehistoric female wanted (or perhaps how to trick her into scampering off with him to his little leaf-filled bed to reproduce). The female, on the other hand, having easily deciphered the mind of the opposite sex, could be found with a similar expression trying to figure out what was so difficult for the male species to comprehend.

Why was it so easy for the female to understand the male way of thinking? For the same reason that women today have this ability: males have extremely simple, almost one track, minds! (This is besides the fact that the female is probably more intelligent than her rock-sitting opponent.) Yes, the male mind is motivated by one thing. What is it? Considering the fact that the male was the one to introduce the rest of the world to internet porn and the all-American Hooter girl, I don't think I have to actually put it in writing. No matter how hard it is for us all to admit, a male looks at the opposite sex, checks out the body, then the face, and with his prehistorically motivated mind asks, "Is she doable?" And what does the female think as she notices her opposite? The fact is that female minds are much more complex when it comes to this area. For centuries, people (you sad little males mostly) have tried to unmask the secret paths of the female mind. Predominantly, this is because female views consist of well-thought out perspectives. In contrast to their male companions, females produce thoughts and actions based on emotion as well as sexual desire. This is not to say that females don't act on attraction alone, for it is quite apparent that this often happens. It is instead to say that females need emotional, as well as physical stimulation to truly be happy. However simple this ideology may seem, modern man still seems to be stuck, not on a rock, but instead on a couch, never quite understanding or accepting this explanation.

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