Hurt People Hurt People by Dr. Sandra Wilson

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Recommended: Influence of family on child development

Dr. Sandra Wilson (2001) provided great insight on why people do what they do in her book “Hurt People Hurt People”. As a Correctional Case Manager for North Carolina Correctional Institution for Women in North Carolina, I have heard many stories from hurt women who have hurt others and as a result landed in prison. So many times I thought to myself that if this person had received therapy or counseling earlier in life, it’s possible that this circumstance would never have happened. Affect

Wilson explains that we suffer from the affects of temporal systems; family, friends, social systems, and churches. From the lecture in week four, we learned that because we live within temporal systems, we are influenced by others in our value systems, behaviors and how we handle difficult situations. Dr. Wilson discussed the “Power of Unseen Wounds” and “Problems of Unseen Wounds” through these temporal systems we develop our system of beliefs and core values. We experience pain that is both internal and external and these feeling must be brought to light in order for God to make us whole again.

How we respond in certain situation is directly influenced by what we learned from those people most important to us during our youth. We learn that we are some how worse off than those around us although it may not be true. Wilson describes this as “binding shame”. In other words, children grow up in conflict, and learn to misbehave, and accept abuse from other family members with the belief that such behavior is correct. Emotional wounds are the results of interaction with other family members who are themselves wounded and hurting individuals.

Wilson suggests that in actuality we all are hurt people that have hurt other people...

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...on, faithfulness towards God and family, love and corrections from my father. Because I viewed him as a real man, and a Godly man, I married a man just like my father.

It is sad to know that others will never have that type of relationship with a natural man, but God who is the “loving father” is able to be all things. 2 John (KJV) 1:3-4, 9 “Grace be with you, mercy, and peace, from God the Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and love. I rejoiced greatly that I found of thy children walking in truth, as we have received a commandment from the Father. Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Christ, hath not God. He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son.” Now everyone has the opportunity to have a perfect role model by receiving Jesus Christ as their personal savior.

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