To Kill A Mockingbird Opening Scene Analysis

In the early 21st century, in a small town of Mequon, Wisconsin; a great injustice was being imposed upon the nobel students & staff of Homestead High School. The formerly great school was in a state of disrepair, textbooks were old and reeked of goat milk, the ceilings were filthy and foul, and even the heating and air conditioning systems were decayed and inoperable relics of a better time. Then, during an otherwise average and dreary day the whole student body was taken by surprise as the loathsome and terrible consortium, known as the school board had announced via loudspeaker, yet another set of horrid budget cuts. Unsurprisingly, the cuts were meant to free up funds for use of construction of a new astro-turf football field. For years,

the school had allocated huge sums of money into its football program, and the students and teachers suffered the unwarranted consequences.

Adolescents and adults alike were powerless to stop the sacking of the sacred texts, literary masterpieces such as “Ethan Frome”, “Huckleberry Finn”, and “To Kill A Mockingbird” were all gathered up and thrown into trucks and taken away for sale. The majority of books were pulled from Mr.Gaebel’s room which was under the care of a substitute while he was recovering from a recent hockey tournament which had left him in a coma of sorts, “ If only Gaebel were here, this never would've happened” a scrawny sophomore proclaimed at the lunch table.
“Where even is that guy?” the girl next to him inquired
“He's still at the hospital last i heard” Davio Gancitano, the dashingly handsome junior, informed her “ Infact we should see if he's awake yet, i bet he’d know what to do!” and at with they set out.
When they arrived at the hospital, Mr Gaebel appeared to be in a deep coma, hockey stick still clutched in his hands. Davio dramatically screamed in Mr.Gaebel’s ear “THOSE DESPICABLE SOULLESS FRIENDS TOOK ETHAN FROME!” Gaebel’s eyes fluttered and then snapped open, he slowly turned and proclaimed “Well then, I guess these bombastic book burglars will just have to taste the fiery slapshot of expository justice!”. And with that the young sage threw his hockey stick through the window and jumped through the window, falling at least 15 stories before combat rolling and taking off in a flat sprint towards his home from the hospital parking lot. When he arrived he was greeted with revel and fanfare by his pack of vicious wolves, as he walked inside he found his entire 3rd hr class inside. “What’re you lowly peasants doing in my abode?” he inquired. They proceeded to explain the situation and desperately awaited Gaebel’s response. After a moment he spoke up “That collective of dastardly villains shall not have my students reading dictionaries any longer!” -he turned towards the students- “fear not for before you stands the legendary Gaebel sensei, i shall vanquish them just as i have countless ninja, ghosts, zombies, gremlins, hobgoblins, and costco employees before them!” -he spun on his heels- “Yes i say, fear not! for it was i who saved the us olympic hockey team from bioengineered death penguins, and vanquished the entire arrowhead english department with a single semantic map!”. The students, roused and rallied by his heroic boasting, gathered around him and threw off their shoes as a sign of respect. “I see i have your support.” he proclaimed with jedi like composure “We march at dawn!”. What that protector of the realms of men had not realized was that the creature Daigle had been hiding beneath the floorboards the whole time. As soon as the last of Gaebel’s companions were asleep, the vile agent of evil clawed through the floor quiet as a gelfling and crept through the hero’s hall. The rotten creature prepared to devour the sleeping children, but just as he went to tear an unsuspecting freshman from his sleep and into the darkness of an early demise a resounding smack sounded through the room as Gabel headshotted the fiend with a hockey puck. “Perfect slap shot!” he roared, Daigle shook off his daze, and with the puck still embedded in his forehead, he charged at Gaebel! But unbeknownst to Daigle, the master of grammar was also a master of kendo, and with one graceful slash of his mighty hockey stick, he decapitated and slew the beast. At sunrise, atop his mighty war wolf, pack and class close behind, Gaebel set out on his final crusade.
When they arrived at the dreaded highlander walkway they were met by the catalyst of evil itself, the entire school board was assembled in the courtyard, Gaebel and the dark lord of the budget locked eyes, and they knew what came next.Gaebel drew his hockey stick and sent in the wolves, but Darth Bauer quickly slew all of the beasts, losing only accountants.

Gaebel charged the main group and hacked and slashed through nearly all of the board members, while Bauer tried to catch up and deal a blow. Gaebel had inflicted broken jaws, impacted skulls, and shattered knee caps, but just as he was finishing off the last foe, Bauer landed a deathly blow. Gaebel was unable to stand, his wound wept crimson blood as he fell to his knees. Bauer prepared to finish off that knight of knowledge, he raised his blade preparing to strike, Gaebel could not defend himself. Suddenly a familiar voice is heard as a hockey puck shoots straight through the chest of his enemy, Bauer dropped his sword and fell, defeated at last. Gaebel’s would be savior was his closest friend and companion Davio Gancitano who’s slapshot was second only to his own. The entire class rushed to his aid but it was already too late, he had died a hero’s death. They picked him up and mournfully headed back towards his home, when the arrived they took him deep into the forest and laid him to rest alongside his pack. Some say that in those woods, in the wee hours of the morning you can spot a stately blonde

wolf,
wearing sandals.