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Advantages and disadvantages of helicopter parenting
An essay on the effects of helicopter parenting
Advantages and disadvantages of helicopter parenting
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What is a helicopter parent? Kayla Reed, a doctoral candidate in Marriage and Family Therapy, states that “Helicopter parents are those who are overly involved, they mean everything with good intentions, but it often goes beyond supportive to intervening in the decisions of emerging adults” (“Hovering can Hinder Transition to Adulthood” 11-12). Hovering parents act the way they do because they want their child to prosper in the real-world, but they are actually hurting them (Stahl). Helicopter parenting affects a child’s development and eventually affects them going into their adult life. Helicopter parenting can hinder a child’s development into adulthood, cause children to act rebellious, and prevent the child from being independent and having …show more content…
Kids become unhappy with their hovering parents. Their unhappiness causes them to make bad decisions. Bad decisions, such as suicide, can be a result of a helicopter parent (Thernstrom). Kids become so unhappy with their parents being constantly around them. They begin to feel like the only way out is through self-harm and suicide. Suicide is not the only bad decision that is caused by hovering parents. Binge drinking can be caused by hovering parents. Helicopter parents push their kids too hard, this makes the kids want to unwind and drink (Flanagan 24-27). Hovering parents keep their kids close to them and monitor everything they do. Some parents keep this close eye on their children so they do not go out into the untamed world (Flanagan 24-27). Some parents do not realize this but it actually hurts a child more than helps them when they are kept sheltered from the real world. Children of helicopter parents do not know what the real world is like and they do not know their limits (Flanagan 24-27). Decisions often go to the extreme and are out of hand when kids become face-to-face with the real world. Children of hovering parents often succumb to peer pressure when thrown into real world situations for the first time (Thernstrom). They do not know how to handle the pressured situations and often make the wrong decisions. Flanagan states that naive, hovering parents believe that they have raised their kids to make all the right decisions. Once they are in college, kids will drink and will be put into pressured situations that to which they will succumb to (24-27). Kids will grow up and be able to make their own decisions without their parents being there, holding their hand every step of the way. Some parents know that their kids drink. When they know, they do everything to keep their kids safe (Flanagan 24-27). These parents can provide their child with a safe ride home at the end
In the article “Helicopter Parents Now Hover at the Office,” The Wall Street Journal columnist Sue Shellenbarger reveals that some parents have begun to involve themselves into their adult children’s job search. Shellenbarger explains that many parent have a hard time watching their child struggle since they have taken part in their daily lives for so long. She then describes that some children do not appreciate the hovering of their parents because the hovering prevents them from developing self independence.
According to the article “Helicopter Parenting Delivers Benefits” by Don Aucoin, and “Bubble-Wrapping Our Children: The perils of Overprotective Parenting” by Michael Ungal”: because are the privilege a problem or ventage for children, which the risk and responsibilities for child education, also the real problem of the overprotection.
Julie Lythcott-Haims’ article from Slate.com, “Kids of Helicopter Parents Are Sputtering Out,” is a recent article published on July 5 2015. Lythcott-Haims discusses the issues of mental health involving college students. Specifically, she is discussing the possible correlation of strict parental guidance—Helicopter or hovering parents--possibly affecting student’s life skills once they are on their own.
Some of these parents are especially needy emotionally and they begin to ‘hover’ over their children in a way to fill that need. Helicopter parents spend majority of their time protecting and preventing children from making mistakes while other aspects of their lives is not covered. Marriages suffer because they is no time spent together as a couple and other children may also suffer jealousy and neglect due to hovering parenting. Social life crumble because parents are not spending time participating in activities outside of their normal life and routine.
Throughout the history of mankind, one thing has separated us humans from animals, which is parenting. In today’s world, you will not find any other animal that will take care of it’s offspring for 18 plus years, well except for bonobo monkeys. Now it is normal for parents to keep their kids from childbirth till the end of their education. However this brings up the question on where to draw the line, and what is the right way to raise a kid. There is one type of parenting that goes beyond the call of duty and it is called helicopter parenting. A brief description of helicopter parenting is basically a parent who is over protective and pays extreme close attention to their child’s life. Although helicopter parenting has some positive results, the repercussions of this parenting style can be harmful to the welfare of child’s development.
Intrusive parenting is a new scenario that has just recently caught the attention of the public eye. Barbara Howard, author of “Landing Helicopter Parents,” refers to these specific types of parents as “helicopter parents” because they are in constant fear that something bad might happen to their child and are willing to do anything to raise a successful young adult (8). It’s because of this fear, that they tend to “hover” close to their child (8). Other terms
Helicopter parenting can take a huge blow to a child’s self-esteem. Self-esteem is greatly influenced by success (Rutherford 407). Success comes with the ability to handle and respond to failure. Failing is good because it teaches a lesson and improves a person. If you’re not failing, you’re not improving. Another negative effect is the lack of proper communication skills. According to Anne Michaud, they don’t know how to confront others because their parents have always done that for them (Michaud). When is comes to the real world, communication is huge. If you know how to properly communicate with others, you are more likely to be better off in life. The next obvious consequence is extreme dependence. They have an inadequate sense of responsibility (Michaud). For hovered kids, it's expected that their parents do all the work for them. This is why many do not know how to be on their own. Their parents have always been around and have sheltered them so much that they don’t know how to make it on their own. In other words, they aren’t taught to be independent. Finally, it's dangerous to be protected from dangers. If the time were to come when a hovered child was actually put in danger, they would not know what to do (Howard 8). If something bad were to happen, it is far more worse to not know how to handle a hazard as opposed to
This style may make become difficult for the child in the future and hinder their ability to become independent. These parents pay very close attention to what their child or children do and are going through, especially with their education. Because of this, it may end up giving the child problems in their adult life. In the article “‘Helicopter Parenting’ Hurts Kids Regardless of Love or Support, Study Says.” it states, “it also suggested that lack of warmth can take the situation from bad to worse, amplifying low self-esteem and high-risk behaviors such as binge drinking.”. As well as “including such over-involved habits such as solving children’s problems and making important decisions for them, while warmth was measured in terms of availability to talk and spending quality time.” Unlike authoritative parenting this parenting leaves no space for the child to grow and explore. Helicopter parents are constantly hovering over their children causing them to become dependent on the parent. Helicopter parents stop their children for learning essential skills in order to gain independence for their adult life. Unlike authoritative parenting, helicopter parenting is unequal in the balance between control the parent has and freedom the child is allowed to have. Over-controlling their children instead of finding a balance is the reason why this parenting style is not the most effective or best
Helicopter parenting is often referred to as over parenting or bulldozing parenting, which means parents “who pay extremely close attention to a child's or children's experiences and problems, particularly at educational institutions” (“Helicopter Parenting”). These parents are included in all aspects of their children's lives and have a difficult time stepping back to let them be independent. Teenagers and college students who have these types of parents have been seen to have low self-confidence and difficulty adjusting to college. Studies have shown that young adults who’ve had parents take care of their problems and complete all their daily tasks have more negative effects than positive. Parents have to learn that it is okay to let their
Schiffrin, Holly H., Miriam Liss, Haley Miles-McLean, Katherine A. Geary, Mindy J. Erchull, and Taryn Tashner. "Helping or Hovering? The Effects of Helicopter Parenting on College Students’ Well-Being." Journal of Child and Family Studies 22.2 (2013): n. pag. Print.
After taking a look at the numbers of suicide, most would be amazed. For example, by the time one reads this paragraph there will be someone attempting to commit suicide, but only 5% of people actually take their lives. Over 80% of these people had problems with their social life in which they lost a good portion of friends or had a “major” problem with their image or self esteem. About half the teens in this country have had thoughts of suicide cross their minds on a monthly basis. Each teen was know to have a deep drop in motivation. In a study of 59 suicidal teens there was reported that only 7 parents knew about what their child was going through. Something more shocking is that out of 36 teens who made a suicide attempt, only 2 parents were aware. The potential risk of suicide appears when a kid has depression and anxiety or even hopelessness. Remember that teens always need to be shown the unconditional love from their immediately family and parents (Langwith,26).
As termed from an encyclopedia article on parenting, helicopter parenting is an expression used in the media to express contempt or disapproval of parents. Helicopter parents simply watch over, or hover over their children and lead them from a better view to give advice. Helicopter parenting is not what it is depicted as; it is a style of parenting that creates a bond between parent and child that in most cases is beneficial in economic, social, and academic aspects of the child’s life.
Most parents take an interest in their child’s life from birth until they become an adult by picking and choosing what is best for them as much as they possibly can. Parents want to help their children to be as perfect as they can make them. Typically hovering parents spend a lot of money, time, and effort filling schedules with things like dance classes, baseball, and tutoring in order to have a ‘perfect’ child. As well as coming to their aid when they are in need, or their defense when they are in trouble. Help in making important, life changing decisions, like where to go to college, or which career to pursue.
Helicopter parenting is the term used to describe parents who are overly involved in their child’s lives/decisions, to the point it becomes a detriment for the child. Helicopter parenting can facilitate a child’s over dependence on the parenting system (van Ingen, 2015). Severe cases of helicopter parenting stunts a student’s ability to learn and grow independently. Helicopter parents indirectly communicate to their children, that they are unable to handle their own life. This can cause students to be fearful of making choices on their own, without first receive feedback from their parental figure. Helicopter parenting can also have far-reaching and lasting effects on a child’s psyche,
In conclusion, suicidal behavior can affect not only the adolescent but their family as well.