The Neglect Of Self And Self-Esteem

1578 Words4 Pages
bulb-icon

Recommended: Essay on perfectionism

With low self-esteem usually comes a persons neglect. I have seen many people neglect themselves for any number of reason, but usually the neglect stems from them trying to be who they have been told they should be, and the feelings of disappointment they have for not being where they have been told and believe they should be in their life. They put someone else's wants and needs before their own–to their own detriment. They are usually not any happier, but quite the contrary. This neglect of self usually leads to feelings of depression that if not addressed can continue to grow. What started out as one little thing bothering them can snowball, and, like a virus, this depression can cause neglect in many areas of a person’s life. It’s very …show more content…

We are all unique. Your life is your life. Everything in your life should reflect your needs and wants, and not someone else’s. This is the lesson we should have been taught, and the lesson we should teach our children. The examples I have given were to demonstrate that almost all of what we are taught throughout our lives is about how to function in the world and deal with other people. So, again, I ask the question: How can you know how to love yourself if you’re not taught? We spend most our lives comparing ourselves to others or competing with others. But, if you are spending your time competing with others and comparing your life to someone else’s, then how can you say that you love yourself? Trying to keep up with someone else or comparing yourself to someone else is not self-love. It is nothing but an example of you not believing that you, your dreams and hopes for yourself are enough. We believe that we love ourselves, but do we really? Of course, you are thinking “I love myself, what is she talking about?” Most of people believe because they groom themselves, or have nice things that they understand the definition of self-love. Those things are just part of it–but self-love goes much deeper then …show more content…

But, here is the thing, you will never be happy if you do not live the best life for you. You will always be on the treadmill of society chasing something that does not and will not fulfill you. When you know and love who you are, you will make choices that are for your happiness and well-being. The choices you make will bring you in contact with other like-minded people, who can further open up your world to new and different things that are more in line with your wants and needs. With self-love it becomes easier to find a partner and friends that you can share your life with, without compromise. Self-love is believing that you're enough regardless of what you do or do not have, as long as what you do or do not have is based on how you choose to live your life, and not how someone else thinks your life should be lived. You have to believe that you are not only enough, but that you are amazing. This is not vanity, ego or selfishness. This is just the plain and simple truth. You are amazing. We are all these amazing creatures who have been created for a reason and a purpose. We were never created to be the same, because we were each created to contribute something different to

Show More
Related

  • Internal Conflicts In Dick Gregory's 'Shame' By Dick Gregory

    1247 Words  | 3 Pages

    What does sense of self-mean? It means what that person sees when they look in a mirror. Whether it is a decent, awful or an indifferent image. Everyone’s self-image is different, and that’s acceptable; normal even. No one person is exactly the same. The authors explain how a sense of self is like internal conflicts and the decision to lie in order to gain approval.

    Read More

  • Charles Taylor Be True To Who You Are Analysis

    1555 Words  | 4 Pages

    No one else can be your true self they can just influence how you turn out to be. Throughout life, we can miss out on the factors that make up your true self. Everyone true self is different, but we each share a piece of our true self. For example, you can listen to your parents or not when finding who you truly are. Who you are is an internal factor and we are affected by external factors in the world. We are writing the definition of ourselves which always includes others. In owning myself, you can say that doing your own thing or finding your own fulfillment is being true to yourself (53). When talking to someone you are reasoning with someone to decide who to be. People make up who you are for you, not the other way around. The people closest to us shape what we like, what we do, and who we are through our language. Everything about our language is who we are to how we speak and who we speak to. This language can be verbal and non-verbal. The language we are introduced to is by someone else through our conversations we are changed ourselves. George Herbert mead called these significant others (53). You can not achieve it on you own, but through our language, we become the things that make us who we are. Through language, we are recognized as to who we are through the conversation we have that we made a decision based on what they like and not what we like. Our most significant

    Read More

  • Self Esteem Essay: What Is Self-Esteem?

    927 Words  | 2 Pages

    Self-esteem has to do with the value you place on yourself and your abilities regardless of what anyone thinks or says. According to Smith and Mackie in 2007, Self-Esteem was defined as follows: “The self-concept is what we think about the self; self-esteem, is the positive or negative evaluations of the self, as in how we feel about it.”

    Read More

  • What Is One Worth?

    1625 Words  | 4 Pages

    In the depths of an individual’s being, lies his or her self-worth. Self-worth molds individuals into who they are, what they want to become. Self-worth lies at the heart of self-esteem. Self-esteem is, Palladino (1994) a blend of “self-confidence, self-worth, and self-respect. It involves respecting others, [along with] feeling a sense of harmony and peace within yourself” (sec.1p.1). The secret to higher self-esteem is the incentive to take accountability for one’s viewpoints, such as his or her aspirations, ethics, capabilities, and curiosities and to understand that these things combined is what makes them who they are (Palladino, 1994). However, the quest of higher self-esteem at times will cause sacrifices to be made by the individual to education, relationships, self-regulation, mental and physical health, as well as other concerns (Crocker & Knight, 2005).

    Read More

  • Ralph Waldo Emerson

    544 Words  | 2 Pages

    This is the main idea of Waldo’s philosophy. He thinks that a man should learn to express himself. Being yourself will help you to solve the problems of your life. We need to trust ourselves in order to improve our life, like all great men have done. Self-reliance stems from within deep in our soul which is the pillar of our personal power and self-respect. This source of all greatness, sets us free form the ego and helps us to transcend through the ideals of love, truth and justice; some people call this “the moral sense”. The soul cannot be completely defined or described but it is the only thing we can be absolutely sure of, since all other facts are temporary. Being ourselves allows us to obtain many more answers and to understand our unconscious intentions. Humans may exceed their limited ideas by realizing that God does exists and that in Him, we will find many answers if we open ourselves to Him.

    Read More

  • Exploring the Connection between Self-Defeating Humor and Self-Esteem

    1326 Words  | 3 Pages

    Heavy self-criticism, envy and a pessimistic attitude follow (Kirsh, 2005). Three states of self-esteem are identified: Strong self-esteem is when they have a positive self-image and are secure enough to make decisions and remain unaffected by any adverse scenario that would cause detrimental effects. Vulnerable self-esteem is when there is a positive self-image yet their ability to maintain it is not reliable. People with a vulnerable self-esteem avoid making decisions, blame others when situations were to turn sour to protect their own reputation. People who do not regard themselves as admirable or valuable, defeated and immerse in self-pity, define shattered self-esteem. Shattered self-esteem is undoubtedly related to low self-esteem

    Read More

  • The Color Purple Essay

    1090 Words  | 3 Pages

    If you don’t have self-love, it’s hard to find what you aren’t familiar with. “Over and over again, Celie accepts abuse and victimization”(Henderson 67). Through victimization, self-blame starts to form over time. Celie wanted a clear statement of what was actually happening to her and why. She redirected her thoughts to the higher power, God.”Dear God, I am fourteen years old. I have always been a good girl. Maybe you can give me a sign letting me know what is happening to me.”(Proudfit 53) Blaming themselves, woman often search for the missing piece in their

    Read More

  • Personal Power Essay

    736 Words  | 2 Pages

    We created our ego self in our attempt to protect ourselves from the losses we fear loss of self, loss of other, loss of security, loss of face. As children, when we didn’t get the love we needed, we decided that our true Self must be unlovable. In our attempt to feel safe, we buried our true Self and created the false self the ego, our wounded self. The ego self then went about learning how to feel safe through trying to control others and outcomes. The ego believes that having control over how people see us and feel about us, as well as over the outcome of things, will give us the safety we

    Read More

  • Self Love Essay: My Journey To Self-Love

    967 Words  | 2 Pages

    Self-love helps build the foundation of who we really are so if this foundation is not solid, life can feel shaky at times. When we truly start to love ourselves, things begin to fall into place for us and life itself begins to feel truly beautiful which is the way life was intended to be felt.

    Read More

  • Primary Concepts of Psychoanalysis

    1640 Words  | 4 Pages

    ...n. Love is assessed by the activity of ego. Loving oneself is longing and belongingness and it lowers self -regard. Freud said if love does not happen there will be a illness. So here the quotes comes “A strong egoism is a protection against falling ill, but in the last resort we must begin to love in order not to fall ill, and we are bound to fall ill if, in consequence of frustration, we cannot love”.

    Read More

  • Self Esteem Essay

    786 Words  | 2 Pages

    Self-esteem is critical evaluation of ones self, resulting in negative or positive thoughts about oneself (Decker, 2010; Kaya & Saçkes, 2004). The way an individual see’s themselves is imprortant in regards to how they behave and the daily decisions they make (Hamarta, 2004). With regards to adolelescents, self esteem is of particular importance, influencing every day decisions that can have a life long impact (Person & Year, 2007). Self esteem can be defined on the basis of the way one sees themselves. In this view of self esteem, there must be a reference point with which the individual compares themelves to although the view of themselves may be positive or negative with respect to that particular reference ppoint. In positive self-esteem the individual is satisified with the way he or she is and thus views themselves favorably with respect to that particular reference point. In contrast, in negative self-esteem, the individual fails to meet this ideal point of reference of how they should be externally (Decker, 2010).

    Read More

  • Self-Esteem And Self Esteem Essay

    290 Words  | 1 Pages

    A person’s self-esteem affects whom he or she chooses to associate with, and how they look at different social groups. This is important because then depending on our level of self-esteem, it essentially tells us how we choose to associate with certain groups and not others, or that we choose to not choose at all. This affects how the population develops relationships with one another. Those who think more highly of themselves (in terms of aspects such as race, socioeconomic status, intelligence, etc.) tend to be very protective of those within their social group, and discriminatory against those who are not, so it is harder as a society to develop relationships unless someone meets certain qualities. This could lead to conflict amongst social groups.

    Read More

  • Construction of the Self

    1195 Words  | 3 Pages

    How does one create the “self”? How do we form as individuals? Whether a person is male or female, white or black, rich or poor, tall or short, pretty or ugly, fat or skinny, the most important factor is the development of the “self”. The self refers to the unique set of traits, behaviors, and attitudes that distinguishes one person from another (Newman 283). To distinguish between oneself from others, one must be able to recognize their unique traits and characteristics. One must be able to differentiate between one’s own physical appearance and another’s. There are many components such as gender, race, ethnicity, and social class, which shape and influence our values, beliefs, and impression of life. Understanding the difference between sex and gender allows one to grow into their own masculinity and femininity. Recognizing the history of one’s past in regard to their ethnic backgrounds and struggle will shape the development on one’s self. Having the luxury of money and power will affect the self and the way that one appreciates the value of the dollar or lack thereof. One of the most important factors may be one’s physical features which will eventually influence one’s self-confidence and affect the self as a whole. Once an individual has acknowledged the traits of their “self”, they’re in control of either maintaining their self, or changing their self to satisfy their standards.

    Read More

  • Identity Essay: Finding Your True Meaning Of Life

    1396 Words  | 3 Pages

    To love someone or something is to care and place it as a priority in your life as something you value. To treasure it as something that is important in your heart to act upon. Having the ability to love is not just about your friends and family, but also random strangers, yourself, and life as a whole. Having friends and family you can always count on is highly important because they are your backbone. They are what keep you going until the day you die. When it comes to total strangers you can feel disconnected from them, but that does not mean you have to withdraw your love. They are still people who walk this earth with you and are on the same journey as you when it comes to finding what it means to live an exemplary life to them. Sharing your love for them can help them get closer to their goal of an exemplary life, even if what you do is small. It could be something as simple as holding a door open or helping them move into their new apartment next door. Love comes in all different levels and when you show kindness to others, it illuminates a feeling for others to absorb. The feeling can make their day without you even knowing it. Furthermore, you have to learn to love yourself. This can be done by finding a passion you whole-heartedly love. Having a passion, you truly love, helps keeps your mind at ease and in a healthy state. Without loving oneself, a person may feel as if they are disconnected from the world. Loving life can be difficult, but it is not an impossible feeling to

    Read More

  • Importance Of Love Yourself Essay

    723 Words  | 2 Pages

    When you truly love yourself life becomes wondrous, colorful, and bursting with great abundance and love. Loving yourself will enable you to be more inspired to reach for new heights to become all that you esteem to be. If you make loving YOU your highest priority I promise you that you will have a happier more fulfilling life.

    Read More

More about The Neglect Of Self And Self-Esteem

Open Document