The Influence Of Self-Discovery In F. Scott Fitzgerald's This Side Of Paradise

The aspect of self-discovery is something that is only granted to those who learn to let go of their foolish desires to conform to the norms of society. In his semi-autobiographical novel This Side of Paradise, F. Scott Fitzgerald creates a fictional version of himself through the book's main character, Amory Blaine, a male protagonist, who struggles in discovering his self-identity, of which he soon does. After learning that molding himself to the ways of society does not satisfy him, Amory soon finds the love of his life, a girl named Rosalind Connage. However, after losing her to another man, Amory’s heart is completely crushed, and he is never the same afterwards. Throughout the book, Amory changes from a selfish, self-absorbed, cocky adolescent

However, Amory spins into a deep depression after Rosalind refuses to marry him due to his current financial state, and instead goes off to be with another guy whom she soon marries instead. The breakup with Rosalind nearly killed Amory, causing him to quit his job and become a huge alcoholic for the next year or so. He soon takes a trip to Maryland to visit an uncle of his, and has a short romance with a girl named Eleanor. Although he has some feeling for her, he knows no girl will make him feel as he did for Rosalind. After returning to New York, Amory soon learns about Rosalind’s plan to marry some high-roller, causing Amory to fall back into his spiral of self-destruction. Without a source of money, nothing comes easy to anyone, and a determined Amory attempts to dig deeper for the meaning of life without love. He no longer sees women as a source of motivation, and he tries to discover who he really is without the help of Rosalind. He says that “It is not life that’s complicated, it’s the struggle to guide and control life,” which shows his urge to find a sense of direction in his life, as well as contributes to him learning who he really is (256). Once he gives up conformity, love and wealth, Amory finally is able to see his selfishness and enters an extremely deep discovery, which allows him to begin understanding himself as a person. At the end, he declares, “I know myself, but that is all-,” which would indicate that Amory knows nothing but himself and who he is, and that knowledge is far more valuable than anything else he has ever wanted in his entire life