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Monogamy as the best type of marriage
Monogamy as the best type of marriage
Monogamy debate points
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For centuries now, we have been taught by society that being monogamous is the socially accepted norm. In fact, having more than one marital or sexual partner in many cultures is considered to be taboo. Yet that leaves many people wondering how that tradition was even constructed and whether or not we should continue to live in a monogamous manner. In this paper, we are going to examine if being monogamous is truly a part of human nature and whether or not we are meant to be with only one marital or sexual partner throughout the course of our lives. Now more so than ever, society is moving in a direction that challenges traditional ways of life and many people are no longer following this socially constructed norm. In fact, monogamy has become a very popular, controversial topic that is continuously being addressed by the media and it has people second-guessing if remaining monogamous fits their ideal lifestyle. This is an especially important topic for our generation, due to the fact that we are currently at the stage in our lives where we set goals for ourselves that will pave the roads of our futures. Deciding whether or not to be monogamous is just as important as picking career paths and it holds just as much significance in the way it affects the rest of our lives. This is a problem in relational communication because whether we decide to be monogamous or non-monogamous, our decision will ultimately affect the way we interact with others and the way we approach intimate relationships. With today’s society slowly moving against monogamy, it’s time to decide if limiting ourselves to one marital and sexual partner is really in our nature, or if it’s just a tradition of the past that no longer holds the social significance that ...
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... generations, as they already recognize the importance in flexibility (White 2013). Monogamy, among other things, isn’t for everyone. As people are becoming more understanding of this, we can see that society is progressing towards a judgment-free attitude of acceptance regarding this personal choice.
In conclusion it is apparent that this is becoming a more prevalent topic among current generations. Current scientific and social research suggest that many are moving towards non-monogamy to pursue a more fitting relationship style that better fits their personal needs and satisfies individual desires. As a culturally constructed phenomenon, we are starting to tests the waters of breaking away from tradition. In a society that prides itself on moving closer towards the future, this one-size-fits-all concept of monogamy is pulling many back into the history books.
In the article “Grounds for Marriage: How Relationships Succeed or Fail” by Arlene Skolnick talks a lot about how the attitudes towards marriages now a days is much different then what peoples attitudes have been in the past. The article talks about how there are two parts of every marriage “the husband’s and the wife’s”. This article touches on the affects cohabitation, and how cohabitation is more likely to happen among younger adults. This article talks about how the younger adults are more inclined to cohabitate before marriage, and that currently the majority of couples that are interring in to marriage have previously lived together. The article stats that some of the Possible reasons for couples to live together before marriage might include shifting norms
In this era we live in, we are brought up to think divorce is bound to happen. According to The American Psychological Association, “about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce” and “the divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.” Many adults decide that it is less messy to just live with one another rather than actually get married. This is beginning to drive the rates of marriage down. Many have speculated that relationships will continue to evolve, especially if the human lifespan continues expand. Fiction writers such as Drew Magary and real world scientists such as Aubrey de Grey have explored this very topic of relationships.
Human beings are not isolated individuals. We do not wander through a landscape of trees and dunes alone, reveling in our own thoughts. Rather, we need relationships with other human beings to give us a sense of support and guidance. We are social beings, who need talk and company almost as much as we need food and sleep. We need others so much, that we have developed a custom that will insure company: marriage. Marriage assures each of us of company and association, even if it is not always positive and helpful. Unfortunately, the great majority of marriages are not paragons of support. Instead, they hold danger and barbs for both members. Only the best marriages improve both partners. So when we look at all three of Janie’s marriages, only her marriage to Teacake shows the support, guidance, and love.
Dating back to the early 1900’s and all the way through to the present, romantic relationships have been viewed differently. From strict unwritten dating regulations to not having regulations at all, recent generations have become more liberated in making their own decisions. The progressing times have made us become a more accepting society and have caused a decrease in the strong practice of religion and class. Even though differences such as religion and class in relationships were more than an issue they were not always a complete deterrence.
Sex at Dawn, written by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethȧ, is a non-fiction writing about the evolution of relationships from polygamy to monogamy. According to the authors, polygamy is leading to divorces, and a change in behaviors of males and females, both humans and primates. Different cultures see that one should have intercourse with multiple men before marriage and others do not believe in such customs. Some cultures commit infanticide when a bodacious female is born in the family because the family prefers to have a male around, as males bring home the necessities to survive, while females generally do not. Another topic in the writing is the change from living in a community to living in a nuclear family. Finally, in some norms it is common for children to be unaware of who his or her parents are and to have multiple family members or strangers take care of the children. There are many customs in the world that some see as strange, but it is normal for the people who grew up around these particular traditions. While reading this book, some of my views have changed on some topics.
Monogamy is a cultural norm that dominates many modern societies, and when individuals engage in monogamous relationships, they are unconsciously conforming to historical and cultural legacies of what is perceived as love that predate their illusions of personal agency. Although anthropological records indicate that 85% of human societies have tended towards polygamy (Henrich, Boyd and Richerson 2012), the modern culture of monogamy has rapidly risen and spread in the past millennium (Senthilingam 2016). This demonstrates how an individual’s conception of a heterosexual relationship as normatively monogamous has been constructed by social forces. In addition, social forces in the form of state legislation also perpetuate and reinforce an individual’s conception of what a romantic relationship should entail. Monogamous heterosexual marriage remains to be the only form of marriage with legal recognition in many countries. An individual’s belief that a romantic relationship should culminate in marriage is hence not formed through independent thought, but rather through what is considered normative by law. Essentially, “marriage is not an instinct but an institution.” (Berger 1963, 88) because it is enabled and promoted by virtue of the law. In addition, many couples believe in
Currently, by definition and tradition, we are living in an American society that sees itself as predominantly monogamous. However, this monogamous society has increasingly been filled with cheating, unfaithful, and overall promiscuous individual. As of today, 57% of American males and 54% of American females, admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they’ve (Glass) So what exactly happen to the ideology of monogamy in America? What has happen to the system of having only one partner at any specific time? Is monogamy really dying, or is it already six feet under in today’s society? Some may argue that America was never truly a monogamous society and thus monogamy isn’t dying but merely less represented. On the other hand, people argue that one can do as they please and if being in a non-monogamous relationship makes them happy, to each their own. My own view is that monogamy is facing a dying role in American culture. Non-monogamous practices have grown to become a visible part of today’s American society. This paper will look at why monogamy is important, the reason it’s dying and why it needs to be placed back in the spotlight.
The writings of women in West Africa are similar to the writings of men in reaction to the distorting images and representation projected by the imperial colonial masters. Authors like Chinua Achebe and others wrote to tell the African man’s story by an African in order to set ‘the record straight.’ In doing this, they bring to the fore their own bias and stereotypes about women in the society. Their writings were replete with the ‘African way’ of treating women – objects, properties, and expendable (Boyce Davies 1994). While women like Flora Nwapa and other earlier writers told the African woman story without an appearance of opposition to the male hegemony, “male literary critics have tended to marginalize women’s writing and to dismiss foundational
Despite these notable numbers, polyamory remains misunderstood and much maligned. Largely due to our unwarranted and yet seemingly unwavering faith in the sanctity of monogamy, polygamists often feel tremendous pressure to hide their private lives, for fear of losing the respect of friends and family. By creating a stigma around having multiple partners, we as a society are committing nothing less than discrimination. Despite all of the arguments that its opponents have hurled against the lifestyle, p...
When Love Story first appeared, our society was still extremely absorbed in a marriage culture that encouraged and supported getting and staying married. But inside a few years, the women's movement, the pill, the sexual revolution, and various economic shifts had permanently transformed that marriage-centric society. Marriage is not an endangered species, but it is surrounded by enormous difficulties that were not readily apparent 35 or 40 years ago. Divorce is a very serious presence — over 50 percent of our marriages end in di...
Overall, we can see that 200 years later we are still attempting to escape from the gender line created through society’s image of men and women. Men and women still fail to communicate their feelings within their relationships, resulting in an overall unhealthy marriage. Today women and men attempt to challenge these gender stereotypes by taking on the roles of the opposite gender, but like in the “Yellow Wallpaper” are immediately met with “heavy opposition” and disapproval through the process. Although we may seem as though we are improving in escaping from the gendered stereotypes, the past will always be recurrent in a majority of relationships today if dominance within the relationship is not equally balance between both sexes.
In the United States, marriage is a commitment two people make for the rest of their lives. The average American marriage lasts seven years. Well over half of all marriages end in divorce (Francouer, 72). Statistics in the infidelity have rose fifty percent since the 1970s and is rising all the time. The divorce count in this country is now up to one out of every three-marriage end in divorce. Serial polygamy is a common lifestyle for those who are divorced and then become remarried. The relationship between a husband and wife should be sacred and trustworthy. Without the trust and honesty there is no marriage. Monogamy is the loving, sharing, and devoting one's self to another person for the rest of their life. Monogamy should be the most important aspect in a marriage.
The first reason monogamy is a good thing is because it promotes peace. Monogamy will lead to less anger and more people loving one another. When someone has an affair, most times it leads to someone getting angry. By living a monogamous relationship, there is no chance for this type of anger and hatred
Monogamy, in all sense of it and what it stands for, is the best form of a relationship. It’s big enough to comprise father, mother, and children and yet small enough to relate and understand one another’s concerns and expectations. A well guided monogamous relationship embedded in trust and love is the best environment one can thrive in. This especially is true for children who cannot make decisions for themselves and are completely dependent on the choices made for them. Monogamy also encourages gender equality and compromises between two parties to reach fundamental decisions. The benefits to monogamy greatly outweigh those for the alternative relationship styles. Thus, monogamy is a strong foundation and creates an environment for enhancing the positive growth for many generations to come.
In today’s society the assumption asserts that there must be only two adults integrated in a relationship, however in polygamous environments, having more than one spouse is traditional. Some may argue that Polygamy is simply just an alternate lifestyle. This, however, ceases to be true. Young girls are being forced to marry older men and sometimes relatives. Little boys are often abandoned because it appears to be competition for older men. Children are victims of sexual and physical abuse. Whereas, for women, they generally become stripped of their money and experience competition against the multiple wives a husband. Although Polygamy is viewed as immoral by society, the main focus point should be saving young children and women because