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Parental abuse effects on children
Parental abuse effects on children
Parental abuse effects on children
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Mom? Dad? Both? On the surface, Evelyn Lau’s An Insatiable Emptiness examines a young girl’s descent into bulimia fueled by the emotional trauma of her controlling mother’s abuse. The mother’s ridicule of her daughter’s blossoming body, and making the girl feel ashamed of herself for the natural changes during puberty resulted in self-loathing and an unnatural relationship with food. Her mother’s abuse extended to food as well, as she forced a strict diet on the family and blamed the daughter for it. Looking at the instances of her mother’s emotional, mental and physical abuse (forced diet), could convince the reader that her mother alone caused all the daughter’s pain. However, the father must bear the greater responsibility for his daughter’s …show more content…
For a child, having only one parent is tough but can be understood if that parent is missing due to divorce or death, as bad as those reasons are; yet the psychological effect for the child who is purposely betrayed then abandoned by a parent is devastating and can last a lifetime, affecting every future relationship. In this story, the father is that parent. Lau doesn’t give us the girl’s name. Perhaps it is symbolic of the girl’s feeling that she hates her body, and that she really is no good, as her mother said (160) and therefore she doesn’t deserve a name. She becomes a non-entity, a thing despised by her mother and herself. As a young adult, she says “I no longer thought of myself as a girl or a woman . . . I was an “it,” a conduit for a constant stream of ugliness that had to pass through it in order for me to stay pure,” (161). The father doesn’t openly despise his daughter, but neither does he give her the …show more content…
Perhaps he was a lazy man, or a peace-loving man or an ignorant man, but regardless of the reason he decided to be distant and quiet, his noninterference only served to exacerbate his daughter’s problems. He had opportunities to speak to his wife about her behavior when it was apparent that her actions caused suffering for their daughter. A case in point is the dinnertime scene when the wife serves only “small portions of steamed fish and vegetables, chicken with the skin removed,” then after dinner when everyone was still hungry she would tell her daughter “It’s because of you that we didn’t get enough to eat, that we’re going to bed hungry . . .” (158). This father was not blind and deaf. He became complicit in the abuse by his silence. He did not attempt to dissuade his wife from forcing her strict diet on the family. He must have noticed his daughter’s head hanging down and her tears and pain at the table as he meekly ate the paltry dinner (158). When his wife was rapidly losing weight he insisted that she eat but he shortly gave up and began staying away from home until dinner was over (159), becoming even more distant from his hurting child. Rather than confront his wife to help both her and their daughter, he demonstrated a strong fear of his mate by staying out late, then staying in another room until he was sure she was asleep before going to bed himself
However, these views don’t take social process into consideration. Therefore, they organized a self-help group for bulimics and anorexics known as BANISH in order to determine what societal aspects cause these disorders. The author’s group consisted mostly of college age females which is significant because this is group primarily affected by these disorders. Interestingly, the backgrounds of the women in the BANISH group are strikingly similar in that they are excellent students, good children who have very close parental relationships, from “functional” families - all having been brought up with an emphasis on thin physical appearance. The authors also allude to the fact that in today’s society, slimness is considered attractive and most worthy, while being overweight is viewed as both morally and physically wrong. Society labels heavy people as “lazy, obscene, and unhealthy”. (244) It is noted that when members of the group lost weight, they reported feeling more accepted and
In Andre Dubus’ The Fat Girl, Louise is a young adolescent with detrimental eating habits and broken self-esteem. Her lack of self-confidence stems from her atrocious emotional habitat. Louise receives constant criticism from her mother regarding her weight. Her mother states “If you are fat the boys won’t like you.” That kind of ridicule being said by a mother to her 9 year old daughter creates an atmosphere of self-hatred and self-loathing. It is not only her familial environment that contributes so greatly to Louise’s destructive behavior. She has few friends and the one’s she does have agree she needs to change. The society in which she lives also is a contributing factor; the society is laden with stigmas positioned on appearance. That manner of daily ridicule only introverts Louise even more, causing her secretive, binge eating to deteriorate. In research conducted by Ursula Polli-Potts PhD, Links between Psychological Symptoms and Disordered Eating behaviors in Obese Youths, she explains the correlation between psychological, emotional factors and eating disorders in overweight adolescents. Potts states, “The association between binge eating symptoms and eating in response to feelings of distress and sadness with depression/anxiety symptoms corresponds with the results of other studies.” Potts and her colleagues took overweight adolescents and placed them into control and variable groups to ensure correct data. The outcome of their research was that there is a direct correlation with emotional binge eating and psychological factors. Although more extensive research needs to be implemented, Potts and associates were pleased with the results of the case studies.
In the short story The Father by Hugh Garner there is boy who’s father is not involved in his life. This is mostly because he is always drunk. Because of this Johnny, the father’s son, has not really been able to connect with his father. He is never there for Johnny when he needs him and is always embarrassing him. This made me really sad as I cannot imagine living without a loving father. I do not think that anyone should have to live without the care of their father. I can only imagine how sad that Johnny must have felt to not have a good father in his life. It must have been very hard for Johnny to see all of the other scout and their father’s at the banquet, knowing that he would never have a good father-son relationship with his dad. The fact that he did not feel comfortable asking his dad to come to the scouts banquet himself,
Described within the vignette is a nineteen year old teenager named Brandy. Similar to girls her age, Brandy has difficulties dealing with her body image and self-esteem. For instance, she experiences hopelessness, isolation, sadness, and anxiety that all contribute to Brandy’s acknowledgement of her physical appearance. She completely overestimates her body size to the point of taking dieting pills then defaulting to purging. During the typical day, the meals are scarce but healthy compared to a bad day full of unhealthy snacking. Lastly, her family predicament is not a supportive one at that. Her mother was obese so she constantly dieted while Brandy’s father illustrated signs of sexual interest although he never physically touched her.
A child’s destiny crucially and heavily relies on the parental figures in their lives. Without such beacons of authority children in these broken homes easily feel partial, mislaid and typically turn out to be errant. The novel “Father Cry” by William Wilson, beautifully covers both the ideas of spiritual parental figures and physical parental figures. Analyzing several different subjects such as heartbreak, love, hope and many more, this book is able to holistically cover the general subject of parenthood. This is an amazing book with many things that one can learn from. Many ideas and topics in this book opened my eyes, pushing me to the verge of tears in some parts. That being said, one subject in particular that most impacted me was the
Hornbacher, Marya. Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia. New York, NY: HarperCollins, 1998. Print.
Contrary to the husband’s assessment of his wife’s illness, she was rather great in her willful approach to reconciling her illness.... ... middle of paper ... ... However he may see her, insane or merely a bother, it’s relative to him only insofar as to keep her at bay and out of his way, still under his control.
Calliope is not the only human who has been a victim of self inflicted body shaming, studies have revealed that women go on severe diets to obtain what the media defines as a perfect body. In Rose Weitz and Samantha Kwan’s novel: The Politics of Women’s Bodies, “27.3 percent of women are “terrified” or getting fat… A total of 5.9 percent of women met psychiatric criteria for Anorexia or Bulimia (USA Today 1985)” (68-69). Not only do women struggle with the appearance of their bodies, some punish their bodies by self induced vomiting or starvation in attempt to achieve an idealistic body. While Calliope feels ashamed for lacking a womanly figure, woman elsewhere envy Calliope’s body and are bullying themselves as a
The author’s intended audience is most likely to people who are experiencing the disorder or are interested in knowing more about eating disorders. When Lia was admitted to New Seasons, her rehabilitation facility, she relates her experience to someone who has gone through the struggles in that kind of facility. Lia was expected to be “a good girl [by not poking holes] or write depressing poetry and [eat and eat]” (Anderson 18). Her struggles in the facility allowed the audience who experienced this disorder to relate their experiences. In addition, people who choose to starve...
The boy appears to play the role of the responsible adult more so than the father does. The boy has typical signs of a child from today’s broken family relationships; he does not want to disappoint either parent. The boy s...
Thisbe Nissen’s 3 12 x 5 dives into the story of eating disorders and body image within a “picture perfect” family, exploring this topic from the mother’s perspective. Mother’s, Daughters, & Body Image by Hillary L. McBride explores a psychological perspective of the mother and daughter relationship, and
Many people believe that eating disorders are a product of the twentieth century, brought on by teenage girls aspiring to be supermodels like Cindy Crawford. Although such pressures are precipitating factors to many eating disorders, doctors diagnosed patients with anorexia as early as 1689 (Spignesi 7). One early example of anorexia is present in the novel Jane Eyre. Written in the mid-nineteenth century by Charlotte Brontë, this book describes a young girl whose personality bears striking similarities with that of a diagnosed anorexic. The life of the main character, Jane, has also been shown to share innumerable similarities with Brontë's own life. Biographical information from researchers and autobiographical information from Jane Eyre (whether intentional or not) verify that Brontë had an eating disorder.
The. Boskind, Lodahl, and Marlene. "Cinderella's Stepsisters: A Feminist Perspective on Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia." Signs: Journal of Women in Culture and Society 2.2 (1976): 343- 344. Print.
Dr. Haim Ginott, a renowned Psychologist, mentor and a teacher once remarked, “Children are like wet cement; whatever falls on them makes an impression.” Thus, the effects of absent fathers on children may in fact, shape their perception of the world around them. Even though developing a stronger relationship with one parent is an effect of absenteeism fathers, it also comes with the challenges of engaging in early sexual activities, diminished cognitive development and poor school performance, which are effects exhibited by many daughters.
The role of the father, a male figure in a child’s life is a very crucial role that has been diminishing over the years. An absent father can be defined in two ways; the father is physically not present, or the father is physically present, but emotionally present. To an adolescent, a father is an idolized figure, someone they look up to (Feud, 1921), thus when such a figure is an absent one, it can and will negatively affect a child’s development. Many of the problems we face in society today, such as crime and delinquency, poor academic achievement, divorce, drug use, early pregnancy and sexual activity can be attributed to fathers being absent during adolescent development (Popenoe, 1996; Whitehead, 1993). The percentage of adolescents growing up fatherless has risen from 17% to 36% in just three decades between 1960 and 1990 (Popenoe, 1996). Dr. Popenoe estimates this number will increase to approximately 50% by the turn of the century (Popenoe, 1996). The US Census Bureau reported out of population of 24 million children, 1 out 3 live in a home without a father (US Census Bureau, 2009).