Stop, Think, and Listen Before Speaking
When people speak before thinking or even listening to what is being said, the breakdown of communication can happen rapidly. Poor listening habits can negatively affect business and personal relationships. Here is a situation where poor listening habits and poor thinking skills had a negative impact and hindered the communications between a leader of a Family Readiness Group (FRG) and the FRG members.
In July of 2003, 1/87 Infantry Battalion deployed to combat in Afghanistan. The deployment was to be only six months long, and the soldiers would be rejoined with their family members shortly after the New Year started. The family members that were left behind formed a FRG to assist families during the deployment. Deborah, being the most senior wife in the section was, made the section FRG leader, which means her duties were to keep the FRG members informed and up-to-date on the situation of the deployed soldiers. However, Deborah worked a fulltime job and had a family of her own to care for; Deborah attended all the battalion FRG meetings. Deborah also called, informed, and kept all her members up-to-date of the incoming information that was being released at the battalion FRG meetings. Deborah would also pass on information to the members of her section’s FRG that was given to her by her husband; Deborah was doing her best to ease the minds of the family members that were left behind to run the house and carry on with daily life.
At the time, it was late November and the Battalion was scheduled to return home in six weeks. Thanksgiving was only two days away, Christmas was just around the corner a feeling of hope and joy was in the air. Then, in the middle of the night, Deborah’s phone rang; Deborah’s husband was calling; she could tell from his voice that something was wrong. Through a cracked voice, Deborah’s husband informed her that he had just received word that the Battalion would be staying in Afghanistan for another four to six months. He asked Deborah if she could call just the section’s wives and as tactfully as she could, inform the wives. He also asked Deborah to tell the wives that the information being passed was not being formally released as of yet that he just wanted to give the wives a forewarning so that they were not blindsided when the extension was officially released. As soon as Deborah hung u...
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...ully to what was being said to them. When Deborah called the section wives and informed them that even though the information was not official, she felt that this was her duty to give the wives in her section a forewarning that the Battalion’s deployment to Afghanistan would be extended another four to six months. The wives should have listened to what was being said and prepared themselves for when the information was officially released; instead they became emotional and made the situation spin out of control and hurt Deborah, the one person that was looking out for the section’s wives best interests.
In conclusion, the entire situation could have been avoided two different ways. The first way the situation could have been avoided; was if the wives that called crying to the Commander’s wife would have listened closer to what Deborah was informing them of, even though what she was saying was not what they wanted to hear. The second way the situation could have been avoided; was if Deborah would have kept the information that she had received from her husband concerning the Battalion being extended in Afghanistan to herself, and waited for the official release from the Battalion.
The book Black Hearts begins by painting an awful picture of a crime scene that was reported to 1st platoon Bravo Company of the 1-502nd 101st Airborne Division. The soldiers that are sent to investigate find that an entire family has been murdered, the daughter had been raped, and someone attempted to set the house ablaze, the family had all been killed in a seemingly brutal execution, while investigating one of the NCOs found a shotgun shell which he thought was strange because most Iraqis do not use shotguns. He compiled the evidence to be sent up to higher and they chalked it up as another Iraqi on Iraqi sectarian execution. Then the book takes us to before any of that happened, the book focuses on a battalion in the 101st Airborne Division, leading the battalion was Ltc. Kunk, he ruled with an Iron fist and was very hard on his subordinates. Within the battalion the book focuses primarily on Bravo Company, who was headed by Cpt. Goodwin. Goodwin was a competent leader but Ltc. Kunk had a reputation for being very hard on his company commanders and having very little faith in their abilities. Pre-deployment while at JRTC (Joint Readiness Training Center) he would explode on his commanders, and tell them that they were doing everything wrong, criticizing and degrading them. This wore down on his commanders and especially Goodwin, Goodwin would begin to second guess his decisions, making him less effective as a leader and making him make more mistakes than before, this would make Kunk even more upset and he would berate him even more than he would in the first place. The battalion would be deploying into the “Triangle of Death” a patch of ground south of Baghdad. It ran along one of the major highways that led into Bag...
...r because it seems impossible to reconstruct an event from this objective point of view. Maybe the point of telling stories is not trying to recreate the reality of a past event, but it is the message that matters because that might be in the end the only thing that does not necessarily depend on single details of the story, but on the overall picture of an event. That is why to O’Brien another important component of a war story is the fact that a war story will never pin down the definite truth and that is why a true war story “never seems to end” (O’Brien, 425). O’Brien moves the reader from the short and simple statement “This is the truth” to the conclusion that, “In war you lose your sense of the definite, hence your sense of truth itself and therefore it’s safe to say that in a true war story nohting much is ever very true” (O’Brien, 428). These two statements frame the entire irony of the story, from its beginning to its end. Almost like the popular saying “A wise man admits that he knows nothing.”
In the aftermath of a comparatively minor misfortune, all parties concerned seem to be eager to direct the blame to someone or something else. It seems so easy to pin down one specific mistake that caused everything else to go wrong in an everyday situation. However, war is a vastly different story. War is ambiguous, an enormous and intangible event, and it cannot simply be blamed for the resulting deaths for which it is indirectly responsible. Tim O’Brien’s story, “In the Field,” illustrates whom the soldiers turn to with the massive burden of responsibility for a tragedy. The horrible circumstances of war transform all involved and tinge them with an absurd feeling of personal responsibility as they struggle to cope.
Cora and Alice have a great deal of respect for their father and believe him to be an honorable man as a father and a colonel. They see themselves as being in a higher social class because of their father. Right before the massacre occurred, Cora says that the fort is no longer fit for the children of officers. The other women of the fort try to
...though people believe that, those on the home front have it just as a bad as the soldiers, because they have to deal with the responsibilities of their husbands, there is nothing that can compare to what these men have gone through. The war itself consumed them of their ideology of a happy life, and while some might have entered the war with the hope that they would soon return home, most men came to grips with the fact that they might never make it out alive. The biggest tragedy that follows the war is not the number of deaths and the damages done, it is the broken mindset derives from being at war. These men are all prime examples of the hardships of being out at war and the consequences, ideologies, and lifestyles that develop from it.
...be authority is hard for most to see and accept. If a woman were in a commanding position it can be tough for men to take orders. It’s not what people have come to know in our society so change is hard to accept in this case. If women can’t be listened to and can’t be respected they can’t have the choice to be taken away to be forced into the military where they already don’t want to be and have a hard time being accepted.
...d he is completely shocked that she would take something that far too only prove appoint. She leaves him in charge while she goes to complete paperwork. While she is away, he is showing her men how to shoot and during one of his presentation the gun malfunctions and he dies. When she comes back she finds out what happens, but stays in the war to complete her duty to her country.
... The General Accounting Office concluded in a hearing on May 8th 1999 that combat inclusion is the greatest impediment to women attaining higher military rank. Until qualified women are given access to assignments that are central to the militaries mission, they will be marginalized. Sexual harassment is a huge problem
"Update: Women in the Military." Issues and Controversies. Facts On File News Services, 29 May 2007. Web.
In Rebecca West’s The Return of the Soldier the continual coverage made by the media of the war during its occurrence and the infectiousness it had on those back home is portrayed through the eyes of her narrator, Jenny. The use of a female narrator wasn’t uncommon nor new but the way West includes her feminist values into Jenny without making it central to the story is fascinating. Up to this point in history, coverage of a war had never been read about as it was during this period. Because of this advancement in getting news out had improved drastically from the last war, people back home were more aware of what was occurring from reading a newspaper without having to wait for letters from their loved ones out on the front lines. West took this information in full stride and wrote about the emotional turmoil it causes the women back home waiting for their men to come back. She makes mention by focusing and bringing to attention the elements of class, exile from being deployed and the trauma that war causes on the soldier.
A big "celebration" dinner was planned for John's going away. All of his family and close friends came to enjoy good food and fellowship before leaving in the morning. His parents were to drive him to the airport where he would fly to the army base. The same base his father trained at many years ago. John's father was proud of his son, but also a little concerned, for he realized the seriousness of this war.
Ryder made an assessment that reported the guards were treating the inmates so poorly because they were working with intelligence operatives that needed information from these prisoners. The guards felt they were following orders by abusing, and making these inmates walk around with no clothes because it’s what needed to be done to obtain the information. There were multiple reports made to Karpinski of escape attempts because of the poor conditions, but she put in an approval and states day to day changes needed to be made, even though some of these prisoners were being killed and in some instances there was no record of inmates that were in, if they even posed a significant threat to society. There were many ethical violations happening within this prison system, poor leadership was among the highest. The general in charge was said to have never been seen and the guards did not show that they knew how to run this prison system. Human rights should be granted to everyone regardless if the guards felt they were doing a good thing by getting some intel out of them. This situation questions every single soldier involved integrity, duty and moral obligation to their country. When these soldiers took an oath to defend this country, this abuse and
The problem of women fighting in combat along with their male counterparts is not a one-sided problem. Elizabeth Hoisington has earned the rank of Brigadier General in the U.S. Army, leads the Women’s Army Corps and believes that women should not serve in combat because they are not as physically, mentally, or emotionally qualified as a male is and that ...
Schneider, Dorothy and Carl J. Sound Off: American Military Women Speak Out. New York: EP Dutton, 1988.
Communication is one of the most important factors in our lives. It dictates the relationships formed with the individuals in personal and professional lives. Effective communication provides a foundation for trust and respect to grow. It also helps better understand a person and the context of the conversation. Individuals often believe that their communication skills are much better than what they actually are. Communication appears effortless; however, much of what two people discuss gets misunderstood, thus leading to conflicts and distress. To communicate effectively, one must understand the emotion behind the information being said. Knowing how to communicate effectively can improve relationships one has at home, work and in social affairs. Understanding communication skills such as; listening, non-verbal communication and managing stress can help better the relationships one has with others.