Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See

648 Words2 Pages

"A laotong relationship is made by choice for the purpose of emotional companionship and eternal fidelity" (See 56). A friendship comes with many challenges, but with a strong bond between one another, friends can overcome the obstacles they are faced with together. In the book Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See, Lily and Snow Flower are laotongs who face obstacles throughout their lives. Throughout the novel, the two girls have to follow the strict cultural practices to please Chinese Society. They are faced with the pain of foot binding, and the everyday chores women have to do. Together, the girls face big and small obstacles that make the theme of the novel about the bond between women.
In this novel, one of the ways Lily and Snow Flower bonded together was by learning from each other. The two girls grew up in a time where women had a typical boring day-to-day routine. They spent their lives in upstairs women’s rooms away from the rest of the world only knowing how to weave, embroider, and cook. Snow Flower taught Lily something “rebellious” which broke tradition, but made the two girls closer. “My only rebellion came in the form of nu shu, our women’s secret writing. My first break with tradition came when Snow Flower-my laotong, my “old same,” my secret-writing partner-sent me the fan…(2).” Since Snow Flower taught Lily Nu Shu, the two girls were able to write to each other using the secret-code. This form of writing was used exclusively for women’s use. If it were not for Snow Flower teaching Lily Nu Shu, the girls would not have been able to know more about each other and end up not having as close of a bond. Meanwhile from learning from each other, Lily and Snow Flower both experienced the process of foot binding...

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...er learned from Lily how to cook, wash clothes, and how to clean the house. These girls learned from each other without realizing it, and had created even more of a special bond with one another than they thought. After both of the girls had gotten married and had children, the two girls did not see each other as much. Because of nu shu they were able to keep and touch and learn what was going on in their lives. “You who always knew my heart now fly above the clouds in the warmth of the sun. I hope one day we will soar together” (321). Lily wrote these words on her final entry on her fan after Snow Flower’s death. Through all of the lies Snow Flower told Lily, she still loved her and the bond they had together for eternity. Together as laotongs, the girls overcame obstacles, learned from each other, and created an eternal both between women throughout this novel.

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