Self-Esteem In Daphne Du Maurier's Rebecca

Through struggle, one can come out on the other side of adversity feeling stronger knowing that they have survived hardships. In Daphne du Maurier’s novel Rebecca, this concept is examined through an insecure, anonymous young woman who marries above her class to the enigmatic Maxim de Winter. Her marriage leads her to move into the grand Manderley estate, where she encounters constant reminders of her husband’s deceased first wife that force her to see herself as inferior. The narrator’s most obvious distinction is her low self-esteem, highlighted by a barrage of self-loathing thoughts and a consistent belief in her inadequacy. However, when the awkward, unconfident narrator is forced to overcome the obstacles that arrive with life at

Manderley, she becomes a stronger person, even though the months spent at the estate are miserable.
Even before she encounters Rebecca’s influence, the narrator is skittish and submissive around Mrs. Van Hopper, her previous employer, and Maxim. Demonstratively, when she realizes she has spent an hour telling Maxim about herself, the narrator divulges, “I tumbled down into reality, hot-handed and self-conscious, with my face aflame, and began to stammer my apologies” (du Maurier 25). The word choice in the sentence, including “tumbled,” and “stammer,” creates an image of someone clumsy who is tripping over her words because she does not know what to do with herself. The narrator considers her stories a waste of Maxim’s time; she does not think that he would actually be interested in learning about her, and instead assumes that the conversation is a mere pleasantry he is following in order to be polite. An additional instance of the narrator’s lack of confidence occurs as a reaction to Maxim wondering aloud if she has made the correct life choices; the narrator retells, “I saw myself, useless sketch-book in hand, without qualifications of any kind, stammering replies to stern employment agents” (du Maurier 27). By seeing her hobby as “useless” and discounting her qualifications, the narrator reveals how she views herself. She acknowledges that she “stammers” rather than speaks fluidly and even admits that she has no qualifications for a job whatsoever. To continue, as the narrator looks back on her appearance prior to arriving at Manderley, she describes, “I can see myself now…with straight, bobbed hair and youthful, unpowdered face, dressed in an ill-fitting coat and skirt and a jumper of my own creation, trailing in the wake of Mrs. Van Hopper like an uneasy colt” (du Maurier 9). The narrator dismisses her physical presence and bland appearance easily and even compares herself to a horse following its owner, indicating her confidence is so low that she considers herself more of a pet than a person. The awareness with which she presents these facts goes to show how present they were in her mindset as a young woman, constantly lowering her self-esteem. Therefore, the narrator’s negative opinion of herself, both internalized and projected externally, indicates that she had low self-esteem even before the grandeur of Manderley.
When she arrives at Manderley and is faced with constant reminders of her inadequacy, the narrator’s self-esteem plummets as she compares herself to Rebecca, Maxim’s first wife.

For instance, after the narrator arrives at Manderley and is greeted by an intimidating crowd of servants, she drops her gloves in shock; when Mrs. Danvers picks them up for her, the narrator admits, “I guessed at once she considered me ill-bred. Something, in the expression of her face, gave me a feeling of unrest” (du Maurier 68). The narrator’s knee-jerk reaction to Mrs. Danvers’ presence is that the servant thinks her crude; this diverges from the typical dynamic between master or mistress and servant. As well, the only mistake she has made in Mrs. Danvers’s presence was dropping her gloves, which would not be as noteworthy if she were more self-assured. Additionally, after working up the courage to explore Rebecca’s old bedroom, the narrator relays, “I realized for the first time since I had come into [Rebecca’s] room that my legs were trembling, weak as straw….How white and thin my face looked in the glass, my hair hanging lank and straight. Did I always look like this?” (du Maurier 168-169). The quivering of the narrator’s legs indicates her fear of Rebecca; it highlights that Rebecca, though dead, is stronger than she is. The manner in which she surveys her appearance contrasts the striking way she envisions Rebecca, who she imagines has a face that is “small and oval, [with] clear white skin [and a] cloud of dark hair” (du Maurier 237). While the narrator’s hair is described as “lank” and plain, the use of the word “cloud” in the description of Rebecca’s appearance emulates an almost fantasy like image. The narrator believes herself less than her predecessor; not just in intelligence, but in appearance, vitality, and physical strength. Her habit of comparing herself to others shines through in this moment, underlining her interpretation of her adequacy. To further

demonstrate, after being led towards a window by Mrs. Danvers, who is trying to pressure the narrator into committing suicide after Maxim’s outburst at her choice of costume at the party, the narrator proclaims, “It would soon be over. And Maxim did not love me. Maxim wanted to be alone again, with Rebecca” (du Maurier 251). The narrator’s self-esteem is low enough that all it takes is cruel, manipulative words from her maid and an argument with Maxim for her to seriously consider suicide. Her statements take on a tone of finality and confidence that are unprecedented—the narrator is unsure of everything, except that she is worthless. As she struggles to carry the weight of her new title and position, especially in comparison to Rebecca, the narrator’s impression of her self-worth dives further.
Even though the she eventually discovers that Rebecca’s manipulation got her exactly where she wanted, the narrator survives her time at Manderley and leaves the estate stronger, having overcome the hurdles she was forced to encounter. To elaborate, on the journey home from Dr. Baker’s where it was revealed Rebecca lied about her pregnancy to get Maxim to kill her, the narrator resolves, “It was going to be very different in the future. I was not going to be nervous and shy of the servants anymore….They would like me, respect me” (du Maurier 382). Now that there are no standards to be met, since she has discovered Rebecca’s malicious intents, the narrator decides to take charge. Confidence on the rise, she vows not to let herself be belittled by the servants any longer, and she will not contribute to that with her own self-depreciating thoughts. To explore this idea further, after Manderley burns down, the narrator remembers, “And confidence is a quality I prize, although it has come to me a little late in the day. I suppose it is his dependence upon me that has made me bold at last. At any rate, I have lost my diffidence, my timidity, my shyness with strangers” (du Maurier 9). This quote indicates that when the narrator swears to behave more confidently, she follows through with her promise, even though she could not do so at Manderley. Additionally, the narrator adds that Maxim is now dependent on her, showing that their positions of power have switched since their time at Manderley, where the narrator was often intimidated by him; the narrator has grown into her full, adult self as a result of her struggles, someone stronger than Maxim. Furthermore, as the narrator reflects on the time after Manderley, she claims, “We all of us have our particular devil who rides us and torments us, and we must give battle in the end. We have conquered ours, or so we believe” (du Maurier 9). The narrator considers herself someone who has battled a demon of her emotions, whereas earlier on, she was quite passive with the way she let occurrences, people’s words, or even her own emotions influence her. Having escaped the torment of Manderley, she considers herself free from the demon that stifled her for much of the book. Noteworthy as well is the use of “we” instead of “I”; earlier on, the narrator makes a habit of idolizing Maxim and thinking herself useless in comparison, which often creates a divide between the two. Now, she claims that they operate as one force, rather than as separate oppositional ones. As she has survived the events that transpired due to her relationship with Maxim and other oppositional forces, the narrator exhibits more assertiveness and a higher regard for her self-worth after leaving Manderley for good.
Contrary to what would be expected of someone after their inadequacy is highlighted for several months, the narrator exits Manderley with confidence based on her knowledge of the truth. Even before the weight of Rebecca’s memory overshadows her at Manderley, Mrs. Van Hopper and Maxim assail her with verbal jabs and snide remarks. By the time she arrives at her husband’s home, her low self-confidence is pressed further by the constant comparison to the more vibrant, charismatic and stunning Rebecca. Ultimately, hearing the truth of Rebecca’s nature from her own husband allows her to realize her worth. Once she discovers that Rebecca lied and cruelly outsmarted everyone to get whatever she wanted, the narrator realizes her own quiet life was one based on truth. It ultimately allows her to see her value and ascend from a meek child to a wiser, braver adult. This goes to show that persevering through times of suffering can lead one to grow into their complete selves.