Rejection

Someone once told me that life is not always fair; that some days are better than others are. Men do not care for this rule and we want everyday to be great, perfect and full of joy; but deep down we know it cannot be. We refuse to accept the unfairness of life though; we resist in our own unique ways to every bad thing that happens in our lives. We have been known to resist violently, lashing out at others in rage; and we have been known to bear the pain ourselves without rage and violence. Either way we find a way to deal, but dealing is not our game in life; we would rather solve the problem than to risk defeat. However, there are times and situations that cannot be solved; that judgment and result are given in one sweeping blow that can knock the wind out of our self-esteem or knock us out completely. These types of problems cannot be avoided if a male wants to have a normal and productive life. It is a matter of our approach and our dealing with the result that will give us a learning tool for future problems. The problem I want to ad-dress is dealing with rejection by a woman in two different stages: pre-relationship and during the relation-ship.

When I say pre-relationship I am trying to say is asking a woman out on a date. For most men this is the trickiest part of the relationship, and the most feared because of that. Men also have a portion of self-doubt in themselves when it comes to persons of the opposite sex that they find attractive. They will go through a period where they try to talk themselves out of asking a woman on a date by using the self-doubt. They will try to convince themselves that they are not good enough for the woman and therefore should not try. This is a subconscious defensive tactic to avoid rejection; because you cannot be rejected if you do not try. Self-doubt is the first snag that needs to be reckoned with before pursuing any relationship.

To overcome self-doubt you need to believe in yourself in and out. You need to show people that you are confident and believe that you are confident as well; if you cannot convince yourself, it will be ex-ponentially harder to convince others.