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Conflict and power relationships
Coecieve power in marriages or relationship
Conflict and power relationships
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Though the majority of intimate relationships entail two individuals committed to one another, one individual tends to embrace a lesser interest in the relationship. This minimized interest could transpire from a vast array of sources, such as lacking intimacy, comparable alternatives, or a lack of emotional connection. According to the text, the “principle of lesser interest holds that in any partnership, the person who has less interest in continuing and maintaining the relationship has more power in that relationship” (Miller, 2012, p. 363). This one-sided power authorizes more of a business relationship, than an intimate relationship. The less committed partner retains the power to dictate the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors of their …show more content…
I faced this theory both through my personal experiences and through my friend and family’s experiences. Personal, I uncover one of the most destructive and tender experiences to subsist as fully devoting yourself to an individual, only to discover that the feelings do not stand mutual, or that they lost feelings. When an individual devotes their absolute self to another individual, they endorse vulnerability – compelling the chance of sanctioning someone to take advantage of them. With recognition of this theory, individuals must take provisions in relationships, as power can stand disparaging. One should love themself before loving another individual, and never sustain unrealistic expectations. We cannot dominate the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors of another individual, so we must value and cherish ourselves.
When detecting my past and current relationships, I determined that I experienced power struggles in intimate relationships. Of the six bases of power enumerated in the text, I resisted against coercive and legitimate power. Coercive power, with a punishment resource, reflects the indication of doing something to an individual that they do not desire, or removing something that they do desire. This coercive power suggests inflicting punishments, or
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Referent power, with a respect resource, elucidates when our partners “adore us and wish to do what we want because they feel connected to us” (Miller, 2012, p. 366). Of the six bases of power, referent power emerges as the most genuine and concerned with intimate relationships. The power does not desire control or authority, but rather emerges from care. While this power can promote complications, if our partner loses their personal wishes and values, it endorses an amorous relationship. Whereas referent power illuminates a respectful and loving power, reward power depends on rewards partners can present to one another that they desire, or take away an undesirable punishment. While this power does not condemn undesirable traits, it rewards the behaviors and thoughts that sanction contentment and gratification. By rewarding a partner when they behave ideally, it stimulates that action’s continuation. We seek rewards, while avoiding punishments. I desire reward power because it affords a manner of exhibiting appreciation and gratification for a partner. Rather than concentrating on negativity, this power relies on the positive outcomes in relationships. Of the six power bases inflicted on intimate relationships, I desire referent and reward power. In my intimate relationships I crave equality, gratification, and respect. Through individualized power in
The relationship between the husband and wife seems initially to be perfect. They both show each other expressions of love. There is understanding, harmony, financial security, and good communication between them. The couple spends a lot of time together, discussing future plans, and talking about the good moments they had in the past. However, behind all of this positive interaction between the two of them is something they are both not able
In the LGBT community, they develop intimate relationships in the same stages as heterosexual couples however they resolve conflicts more positively. Due to them being in a relationship with the same-sex partner, they approach roles in a relationship and marriage using egalitarianism. We all give and receive love differently. Knox & Schacht discuss the different types of loves styles a person’s desires from their relationships such as ludic, pragma, eros, mania, storge, and agape. These different love styles also express how lovers can understand and relate to one
In the book, The Betrayal Bond: Breaking Free of Exploitive Relationships, author Patrick Carnes presents an in- depth study of relationships that are exploitative and can create trauma bonds. Dr. Carnes explores why these relationships form, who is more susceptible, and how bonds become so powerful. In the text he explains how to identify that traumatic bonding is occurring and he provides ways to examine these relationships. Dr. Carnes then provides specific steps to disentangle from these relationships.
Power has been defined as the psychological relations over another to get them to do what you want them to do. We are exposed to forms of power from the time of birth. Our parents exercise power over us to behave in a way they deem appropriate. In school, teachers use their power to help us learn. When we enter the work world the power of our boss motivates us to perform and desire to move up the corporate ladder so that we too can intimidate someone with power one day. In Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness Kurtz had a power over the jungle and its people that was inexplicable.
Never become complacent and let my interpersonal relationship becomes stagnant, which can lead to resentment and conflict. Weighing the cost verses the rewards may not always be the solution for my relationship; simply, because the cost may ultimately outweigh the rewards. The need for autonomy can have reverse effects and may not lead to the closeness that’s expected. In, turn the very thing that, I try to be open about in my relationship can inadvertently cause me to protect my feelings in the
The other four participants, Lesego, MJ, Solomon and Thabo, who are all between the ages of 22 and 25 years old are in an ‘intimacy vs isolation stage’ (Sadock et al., 2015). During this stage, the virtue of fidelity is important as it emphasises the need for young adults to make and honour any commitments they enter (Sadock et al.,
Intimacy and love are important factors to interpersonal relationship but as a foundation to not governing and controlling society. Consider a situation of three-person group, or also known as a triad, intimacy and love is not successful majority of time (Freidkin 05/20/10). Take for example, a family of three, a father, mother, son or daughter, has unconditionally love for each other. However, as the teenager grows up, he or she may not always agree with the parents' decisions about their life; and/or vice versa, in which the parents may not like the teenager's lifestyle. This shows that we tend to hold other with high regards and respect when we love another. Also, when we love others, we want the best for them and help them make better decisions to have better relations with the party. In relation to society, intimacy and love are not ideal features because they are too personal; not everyone will let others control their lives and surroundings willingly for strangers. For those who have conflicting beliefs with higher personnel will feel that some choice...
Perel explains how the culture we live in now withholds different expectations for love in individualistic societies. (Perel, 0:53) This connects to what we learned in the love chapter. We learned that in western cultures, there is an overall focus on “attraction and matching” and the expectation that they will live “happily ever after” with their partner. (Clark, 2015a) These are the expectations Perel is referring to which individualistic societies now rely on in forming their concept for what love should be like in relationships. These expectations however, may also be impacted by interdependency and our compassion level. For example, comparison level “describes the value of the outcomes that we believe we deserve in our dealings with others.” (Miller, 2012, Interdependency, p.176) Our prior events that we have experienced may serve to explain why individuals have these high expectations, especially since the current culture we live. Perel mentions that couples commonly tend to bring up the fact that they want more sex (Perel, 10:37), which in the sexuality chapter we learned that sexual desire and frequency has different factors that are taken into account. For example, comparison level is overall an important aspect to consider here and rather than “evaluating how often they have sex or the degree to which they disagree about sex,” couples should instead
Relationships between two people can have a strong bond and through poetry can have an everlasting life. The relationship can be between a mother and a child, a man and a woman, or of one person reaching out to their love. No matter what kind of relationship there is, the bond between the two people is shown through literary devices to enhance the romantic impression upon the reader. Through Dudley Randall’s “Ballad of Birmingham,” Ben Jonson’s “To Celia,” and William Shakespeare’s “Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer’s Day?” relationships are viewed as a powerful bond, an everlasting love, and even a romantic hymn.
I know this because when the power in the relationship switches between each other, it shows the true colors of the other person in the relationship. ~ Question 3 ~
The better which a person develops an understanding of themselves and of the other people around them, the better able they will be able to develop intimate relationships. A person who has a negative model of self and has a negative model of others , otherwise known as Fearful, is going to shy away from attachment and be socially avoidant which obviously is going to affect the crisis of intimacy versus isolation. The example describes a person who is hesitant to make long term commitments and resists urges to display intimacy, but is capable of forming a dependency on him by the other in the relationship. A Preoccupied person has a negative self model and a positive model of others. They often tend to be overly dependent and ambivalent. The example suggests a person who might be shy and conservative but is capable of not displaying their awkward feelings to the other person. A Secure individual has a positive model of self and others. They are comfortable with intimacy and autonomy and often do not have a difficult time in forming intimate relationships. The example describes this person as someone who is very capable of healthy relationships and good communication skills. It seems like a secure person has all the good qualities that any relationship requires. And finally, a Dismissing person has a positive model of self but a negative model of others. They are characterized by denying attachment and their counter dependency. All of the differences among the different models result from past experiences in the individual’s life. How they were raised in terms of different parenting styles and methods of child raising affect an individuals internal working models of self and others.
142-202. Print. Whitbourne, Susan. " Fulfillment at Any Age: Avoid the Fatal Attraction Effect in Your Relationship. "
There are many different types of relationships. From your neighbor to your significant other, experiencing different relationships is a part of everyday life. Wether you posses good or bad communication skills will affect the interpersonal relationships within your life. The popular television series Modern Family is a good example of the different types of friendships, types of love, and relationship theories that encompass the everyday person.
“Relationships are what make up our world today, they shape the ways we see things and the way that we do things, relationships affect how we see the world today”. I believe supporting what your partner does, having a great sum of trust and showing your affections towards your partner is what will make a healthy relationship great.