Personal Narrative: My Life As A Dog

If I were to describe my life as a metaphor, I would say that it would be a dog that only knows the world within its bounds. Maybe a little like Courage the Cowardly Dog as well if I looked to the symbolic aspect of it. At home the world is normal and serene, yet the moment something passes through or you leave the house things can be skewed. The most normal of things might be seen as inhuman entities out to snatch your dearest ones away. That is the life of the unaware.
Of course being confined is not everything. Being able to experience the outside world is still a moment of excitement as it is a time of learning. Little points of familiar surroundings changing each time. Growing excited over the smallest of things. It is as if I am greeted by a new sight though it is anything but. Eyes gleaming as the sights and sounds are reabsorbed. It almost sounds sad, but being able to feel a sense of renewal is by far better than feeling underwhelmed, especially when living on an island in such a small town. There is not much to see and not being able to go any where often makes

the refreshed excitement ease the stress for adventure.
At the end of the day being able to return home to a place of familiar sights and smells always brings a sense of relief. Allowing for ultimate relaxation without the need to be wary of anything. Home is my territory where everything is in place, which brings me to the need for routine. Having a routine is actually something that dogs like best. If you have a dog you might even notice how they react at certain times despite not understanding the concept of time. While I do not pay attention to time exactly, I still follow a routine, in fact, my routine had developed without realizing it. And while going through this schedule without much trouble is always pleasing, it comes with its own set of problems as well.
More often than not, I tend to find myself unable to break away from my routine. When I try to fit in a new activity I always end up getting distracted much easier. As if there is a force leading my mind, or a magnet attempting to pull me toward it. There have been multiple occasions where I had forgotten a boiling pot of water on the stove due to inserting it in the middle of an activity, such as, writing or chores. It is as if it had never happened and when I do somehow remember it is a moment of extreme panic. For awhile the event leaves me feeling awful. In the end I have had to think up different ways to better remind myself to avoid that awful feeling. Timers, notes, or stopping my actions to patiently wait are my more useful solutions.
Allow me to move on to socialization.
The people that have the most effect on a dog are the ones who take care of it, play with it, and teach it wrong from right.

To me, that is my immediate family and those who have made brief appearances. Whether it was directly or indirectly I had learned from each person about the world and myself. Their influence having a deep impact on me. The worst experiences had been from those that passed through briefly, leaving behind negative memories that have fed the flames of wrath, which lies within an iron cage. Much like a dog whom has experienced all its abuse from a repeated source and now shows hostility. I tend to hold hostility in the same way, though it is most prominent if it involves a certain head figure. That person is the hand that feeds me and I cannot bite that hand. My feelings may twist and form to reflect these influences, but there will be one part that will always remain the

same.
On a more positive note, my most beloved figures have shined through in their influences. They are the ones that have helped me feel that not everyone is out to get me. They have given me purpose to not hide away and shrivel into nothing. Most definitely they do not know this. While I am not as much of a social creature as dogs typically are, I tend to fill that aspect with my attachment to my immediate family. They are my everything and I want to protect them however I can, even if I appear more like a timid chihuahua rather than an intimidating mastiff. The best way I can do this is by protecting the boundaries that I am surrounded by. Their influence had developed my loyalty.
While at first a dog's life looks like one free of complications, one cannot truly judge it by the surface. There is so much more that occupies their mind even if they maybe clueless to the workings of the outside world. It might not be as complex as others who deal with both the bigger picture and finer details, but I will not be undermined by my simple living. I do what I can with what this closed space provides. Even this way I continue to grow and grow and grow. Home is where the heart is, but there might be a day I will be able to open the gate and roam free.