Personal Narrative: Becoming A Father

After growing up, facing responsibilities, and becoming a father, I know that others wouldn’t understand the life I live now. Before my son, I had time to hang out all day and night around my neighborhood with my friends. Although I miss hanging out with no worries and responsibilities, I love being a father to my son. Growing up I considered Derrick as my brother although we weren’t related, we did everything together. I looked up to Derrick, he always had everything “under control”, even down to the girls he messed around with. However I wasn’t jealous; I was only proud of my brother, he was showing me how to be a responsible man, well at least I thought so.

Derrick and I went everywhere together, all the parties, he introduced me to all the pretty girls he knew. Whenever we were with each other I learned something new, he helped me have a better “talk game” which was basically the perfect lingo to get girls to hang out with me. Being with Derrick helped me a lot, I made a name for myself with him. Derrick always had lots of money, he and I would always go to the mall every Saturday and buy the new Jordan’s that came out that day, and we

would, later on, go to the movies near our neighborhood, only because we knew all the girls would be there.
Everywhere we went all eyes were on us, all the time the. All the girls were drooling after us, the other guys would be intimidated by us. We weren’t bullies or apart of any gangs. Around this time we were considered “Players”, this is what girls we’ve dated or dealt with considered us for not being committed to them. Occasionally there would be a little drama here and there, girls were fighting each other over us, which brought more attention to us and even more girls. Sadly, we overlooked those fighting and turned our attention to the new girls, this was a cycle, only worse because at this point we were considered “heart-breakers”.
At first, the attention and the way girls went crazy for me were exciting. I enjoyed being the center of attention until my on and off again girlfriend became pregnant with our son. At first, I just knew I would provide everything we needed, and that financially we would be great. It wasn’t until her second trimester I began to realize that starting a family wouldn’t be as easy as I thought. Being around Derrick so much I thought he was “The Man”, but I realized he was just a boy, and I needed to become a man. The best thing my parents instilled in me was to never be afraid to walk alone, to leave the crowd and take care of my responsibilities.
I started paying attention to my life, started reevaluating the choices I made, the company I kept and most importantly that my child would be here soon.

Slowly I began to drift away from the “Player Life”. My friends started to look at me differently, and to my defense that was the best thing that they could have done, considering I was doing the exact same. I started to look at Derrick differently, I realized that he wasn’t a man at all, in fact, he fiend for attention. He was still my friend, just from a distance. I began saving all my money, prioritizing my life making wiser decisions, and staying focused. I stopped chasing girls, stopped buying so many shoes and movie tickets, and started helping my family. Derrick is still one of my best friends, but I see him differently now, I still want the best for him and always

will.
There are times when Derrick feels as if I think I’m better than him which isn’t true at all, I just know that I have a family that I would die for, and I have to protect them. I have to be a man and take care of my responsibilities. My family depends on me, Derrick doesn’t have a family of his own yet so he won’t understand, why I have to do what I am doing. We don’t see eye to eye now, and we probably won’t for a while, but we support each other the same as we did before. Sometimes, you have to know how far to go, know when to stop, know when to do better. I had to separate myself from those that weren’t good for me at the time so that I can focus on my family, and be the man I needed to be in order to raise my boy into an even better man, one better than me.