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Essays about understanding trauma
Essays about understanding trauma
Essays about understanding trauma
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I wake up, my heart pounding as if I’d just run a marathon. My mind is dizzy with confusion as I try remembering what has happened. Where is my sister and where am I? My whole body feels weighed down and I start to shiver as I try to free myself from this suffocating breach. I struggle to breathe as solid flakes fall over my face. The air around me grows tighter as my breath quickens and I realize where I am, Trapped under piles of snow from the avalanche.
I remember skiing down the mountain with my sister. We went on a back trail that was blocked off. The snow started to come down too fast. My skis could only carry me so far, and with a quick glance back, I saw my sister engulfed into oblivion. A split second later, it hit me, too; the shards of pain from the impact took my breath away.
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I close my eyes and take a deep, calm breath. I start to twist and turn my way out of the thick blankets of snow that have enveloped me, but as it loosens, more falls down taking its place. I shift my hands in front and start pushing the snow upwards, packing it in tighter and allowing more air space. I do this all around my body, relieving the weight. I start to dig my nails into the cold, hard snow, unsure which way is up. I keep digging until my nail beds are raw and my hands are like ice.
I’ve dug a small hole about a foot deep, yet there’s still no sign of light. I wonder, How far under am
The cold chill was blazing on me and my shoe gently began to pull out a tear. I thought about Candy and the other guys. Hopefully, I made the right choice. The sun came down and I ended up in a deserted river. Slowly, I began to regain where I was, and I opened my eyes in disbelief.
It was similar to the suburban street I grew up on, but in lieu of cookie-cutter houses with stale Bermuda grass, there stood wood cabins with yards covered in snow. The reddish-orange light emanating from the towering street lights pierced through a white fog and gently illuminated the area. Exiting the car, I was overwhelmed with a flurry of new sensations. The gently falling snow absorbed all of the sounds I was used to hearing in a residential area.The low hum of passing cars, birds singing from the trees, and the sound of blowing wind appeared to be muffled, even silenced, by the steady falling snow. I felt enveloped in a cool, but somehow familiar blanket. The smell of burning wood was coming from every direction, as each house I looked at had a thin, grayish plume rising gently from the chimney. The plumes represented the warmth and comfort of the many people I imagined to be nestled by the fire. Looking down the street, I noticed how freshly plowed it was. A thin layer of snow and ice-- like icing on a cupcake, or the glass top on my parent’s nightstand-- covered the street. But on the side of the street sat a pile of snow that could have swallowed me alive. Feeling taunted, I stood there and weighed my options. Chest deep mounds of frozen crystals begged me to dive in and lose myself. Preparing to succumb to the temptations before me, I was momentarily hindered by the fear of my parent’s wrath. But had that ever stopped me
We hit the edge of the tree line, prickers pulling and catching on our snow pants. Suddenly, we hit. I could feel myself fly over Caytie’s head, smashing into a tree a few feet away. The wind knocked violently out of my lungs, leaving me gasping for air. I could hear the snowmobile sputter to a stop, my foot somehow underneath the track. I saw Caytie in the snow and to my relief she got up, seemingly unscathed by the accident. That’s when Maddie came barreling down the hill towards the tree line. Maddie yelled, more terrified than either of us. She helped to pull the snowmobile off my foot and me back on my
I am awoken to the sound of tree branches hitting the window and a faint ringing in the distance. I slowly get out of bed worried about what is happening beyond my door. I grab my flashlight and quickly head downstairs. I immediately run into the kitchen yelling for someone, but no one answers. I frantically look outside and see the trees swaying and the night sky turning into swirling clusters of clouds. I quickly run into my younger brother’s room and see him shakily holding onto his bed post with tears streaming down his face.
The freezing wind had chilled my hand to the bone. Even as I walked into my cabin, I shivered as if there was an invisible man shaking me. My ears, fingers, toes, and noes had turned into a pale purple, only starting to change color once I had made a fire and bundled myself in blankets like ancient Egyptians would do to their deceased Pharaohs. The once powdered snow on my head had solidified into a thin layer of ice. I changed out of the soaking wet clothes I was wearing and put on new dry ones. With each layer I became more excited to go out and start snowboarding. I headed for the lift with my board and my hand. Each step was a struggle with the thick suit of snow gear I was armored in.
A calm crisp breeze circled my body as I sat emerged in my thoughts, hopes, and memories. The rough bark on which I sat reminded me of the rough road many people have traveled, only to end with something no one in human form can contemplate.
The ground moved farther away from me as I went higher up. I nervously swung my legs back and forth and placed my ski poles next to me. When I looked down, everyone looked like itsy-bitsy specks in the vast, white snow. Whoa…, I thought to myself, the sight made me feel disoriented. As I went up the lift shuddered, shook, and occasionally swung side to side which made me feel jitterish. I couldn’t believe I was doing this though, but there was no going back now. After a few minutes, or what felt like hours, I could see the end of the ski lift coming closer. I prepared myself by getting ready to stand up by grabbing my poles and tensing my legs. There was a bright red line printed on the snow a few feet ahead and when I reached the line, I quickly stood up and got off. “Phew, at least half the journey’s done”, I thought to
Digging into the snow with my boots while stabilizing my body with the uninjured arm, I inch across the hill, lose my foothold, and plummet downward.
I step into the cold, chilling air letting the wind brush against my face as I look around and see what is before me. I look into the distance and see rolling mountains dancing across the scenery. They are painted in mesmeric reds and different shades of orange all reminding me of an enthralling sunset. Snow falls, literally everywhere covering these rocks not revealing how massive they truly are. The whole scene reminds me of a Christmas card. It captivates your soul. I had was one single destination on my mind and I took a chance and it led me to Colorado Springs, Colorado.
He arrived at his first destination after about an hour of hiking. After a short while he figured he had looked over his new found haven enough, he was ready. He started down the grade with a small arsenal, consisting of a shovel, about ten granola bars, two bottles of power-ade, his snowshoes, and what was left in his hydration bladder in his pack. After descending about two hundred feet he came into the clearing he was hoping to find, it was as smooth as silk, twenty inches of fresh powder under his board. Up ahead he say a small but formidable drop off on the mountain, he knew if he was going to escape this with his dignity he was going to have to work some magic, to his success. The drop was approximately eighteen feet, but he was ready for it, he landed perfectly, it was like a dream the poof of snow exploding out from his impact, and the gentle flakes hitting his face. As he continued down the slope he did not realize that his gentle landing had severely weakened the physical structure of the mountain’s blanket, and that any moment he could bring the mass down upon himself at impossible speeds.
The summer pine trees native to the region were transformed into the dangerously beautiful winter snow ghosts. The rocky landscape with steep cliffs and massive boulders and rocks was stunning. Clouds littered the sky the sun even at summit of the mountain the was barely visible. With that last thought I leaned forward slightly pushing off the curve of the run and began to
I am by myself wearing my blue jeans and an old flannel shirt. It is cool outside but I decided to leave my gloves at home, feeling comfortable with my warm shirt and my sturdy boots.
The journey of life follows a predetermined pattern; we evolve from needing influence and guidance to finally reaching that point where our lives are up to us. I consider myself very lucky up to this point in my journey. Some people become sidetracked and wind up on a far different course than initially planned, but the detours I made have only assisted in embellishing the individual instead of devouring it.
We finish what we start. This was the motto that kept me going during the strenuous training period for a marathon. But prior to that, I must confess, I wasn’t an athlete. I was never interested in playing sports, except for recreational badminton. During gym class, I would walk three quarters of the time when it time for the dreaded mile run. I preferred staying indoors and sitting on the couch and watch movies. The first time I had heard about a marathon training program, called Dreamfar, in my school, I thought to myself, what kind of crazy person would want to run a marathon? Never did I realize, eight months later, I would be that crazy person.
The reckless driver hit us straight on, then “Bang!” a loud noise resonated through the air, and abruptly my body flew out and hit the pavement of the road. Everything around me was simply a white haze for a few seconds after the impact. My body felt extremely heavy and the sharp pain throbbed throughout my face and body. Lying there on the rough asphalt, I faintly heard my mom and Carrie call out to me, “Sydney! Sydney! Are you okay? Answer me! Sydney!” I wanted I speak up and answer them, nonetheless, it was useless, my voice just wouldn’t make a sound. The desperation in Carrie’s and my mom’s voices reverberated to me across from where I was lying. My mom frantically ran up to my side and hugged me tightly in her arms. Blood was squirting out of her pinky, where the top of her finger had been severed. The places where my mom’s tears fell, stung my wounds, nevertheless, it was nothing compared to each little movements that caused the pains to electrify through my body severely. Every second was hell, the pain was just utterly agonizing and tormenting. Whether it was due to the pain or the exhaustion my body suffered, my mind slowly drifted off and I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. As my eyes gradually closed, the blazing siren seemed to have grown louder little by