This peer review will analyze the second draft of “Are Food Deserts Learning Deserts?” by Kimberly Jordan based on the following questions: (1) Is the thesis or research question clearly stated? (2) Does the writer hook the reader with an interesting opening? (3) Does the writer justify the thesis or question? (4) Is the literature review appropriate and thorough? (5) Are the methods clearly explained? (6) Were there any breaks in the logic of the argument, the flow of the paper, the transitions between sections? (7) Is the author using appropriate citations? (8) Is the writing clear and free of common errors? (9) Are there any other suggestions you can make to help the author improve his or her work? This review aims to make supportive suggestions
in an effort to improve the overall quality of the literature that is being evaluated. In the second draft of “Are Food Deserts Learning Deserts?” the thesis statement is clearly stated in the introduction. The concept of nutrition and education being vital for a community to be a healthy and thriving population helps justify the thesis. The opening section of the text is interesting, but more information on food deserts (historical, cultural, and spatial distribution) would provide the reader with a better understanding of the topic and help pull the reader in. It is important to include a literature review in a significant academic project such as this one. If GIS is being used for this project, the process should be thoroughly explained in the methods section, which is currently missing. The flow of the paper needs some work, but the alterations mentioned above will improve the overall flow of the paper. If the author is using APA format, the citations in the paper are incorrect. Also, the reference page, page numbers, and cover page are all missing. In summary, the second draft of “Are Food Deserts Learning Deserts?” by Kimberly Jordan is heading in the right direction, but more information is needed to provide the reader with a better understanding of the project and the concepts being discussed. After reading the second draft of “Are Food Deserts Learning Deserts?” by Kimberly Jordan, there are three questions that develop: (1) what is the history of food deserts in Florida? (2) are there schools located in food deserts that perform well? (3) what are “quality education resources?”
McWilliams claims that buying locally grown food is not actually better for the planet and states his claim in the title of the essay; “The Locavore Myth: Why Buying from Nearby Farmers Won’t Save the Planet”. Although McWilliams presents the opposing viewpoint first, he should also state his main claim in the first paragraph so the reader will understand what the author’s position is, even if the reader did not read the title. Jumping directly into his grounds for the claim without stating the claim may leave the reader confused.
Many in the U.S., today, try to eat well,balanced, meals to order to maintain a healthy lifestyle. They do so by purchasing their food at farmers markets or making their own meals, so their food isn’t processed or genetically modified. Even though people are trying to maintain health in order to live long lives, without medical complications, many don’t have the opportunity to pursue life like this. In “Research shows food deserts more abundant in minority neighborhoods,” the author, Kelly Brooks, portrays an anecdote and logical reasoning, from Kelly Bower’s research, to thoroughly describe the food deserts in poor minority neighborhoods and how this issue needs to be repaired.
In “Called Home”, the first chapter of the book Animal, Vegetable, Miracle: A Year in Food Life, Barbara Kingsolver presents her concerns about America's lack of food knowledge, sustainable practices, and food culture. Kingsolver introduces her argument for the benefits of adopting a local food culture by using statistics, witty anecdotal evidence, and logic to appeal to a wide casual reading audience. Her friendly tone and trenchant criticism of America's current food practices combine to deliver a convincing argument that a food culture would improve conditions concerning health and sustainability. I agree with Kingsolver that knowing the origin of food is an important and healthy benefit of developing a true food culture, but it is impractical to maintain that everyone is able to buy more expensive food. Kingsolver presents a compelling argument for developing a food culture, however this lifestyle change may not be practical or even possible for a poverty-level citizen. The following essay will summarize and respond to Kingsolver’s argument to demonstrate how “Called Home” is a model for novice social scientists.
The book The No-Nonsense Guide to World Food, by Wayne Roberts introduces us to the concept of “food system”, which has been neglected by many people in today’s fast-changing and fast-developing global food scene. Roberts points out that rather than food system, more people tend to recognize food as a problem or an opportunity. And he believes that instead of considering food as a “problem”, we should think first and foremost about food as an “opportunity”.
Alviola IV, Rodolfo M. Nayga Jr., and Michael Thomsen to learn more about what food deserts and how they impact the society around them. I believed that this was a good source because it went into what food deserts are and how they might be connected to the increase of obesity. I learned that a food desert is an “area where access to healthy foods is limited or constrained” (Alviola 106). I also learned that studies have shown people who live in food deserts “are likely to pay higher prices for food and have limited options in terms of purchasing healthy foods” (Alviola 106). After reading this article I have realized that Xavier may also be in a food desert because the closest grocery store is Kroger whose produce is almost always non-fresh and does not look edible to eat which encourages people to leave and resort to eating fast food for every meal. Needing more information about the effects of Food Deserts I started to look at an article called, “The Effects of Food Deserts on the Weight Status of South Dakota Children”, written by Emily Niswanger, Elizabeth Droke, Suzanne Stluka, and Kuo-Liang Chang. I believed that this was a great next source to look into because the name of the article was exactly what I wanted to get more information about. The source was about one study that was made in the state of South Dakota to discover if food deserts do have an effect on
...Hobbiss, A. Food Deserts And How To Tackle Them: A Study Of One City's Approach.Health Education Journal, 137-149.
Food deserts are places where healthy foods are not produced nor sold. Unfortunately, Chicago is filled with food deserts. Approximately 600,000 people reside in areas that consist of food deserts (Gallagher, 2006). Nearly 200,000 of those people are children. These children do not have the opportunity for healthier options, which shows an increase in obesity rates (News One Staff, 2011). There are 77 Chicago communities and out of that 77, 23 are food deserts (Gallagher, 2006). Chicagoans-particularly the black communities- are forced to live off the accessible food that is near them. The food deserts are in Austin, North Lawndale, Armour Square, Near South Side, Fuller Park, Grand Boulevard, Washington Park, Woodlawn, West Lawn, Chicago Lawn, Englewood, Ashburn, Auburn Gresham, Beverly, Washington Heights, Morgan Park, Roseland, Pullman, South Deering, Riverdale, South Chicago, and West Pullman (Grossinger, 2007). The communities are usually served by junk food- filled corner stores, which do not offer an abundance of healthy foods. The communities are in desperate need of change.
...Hobbiss, A. Food Deserts And How To Tackle Them: A Study Of One City's Approach.Health Education Journal, 137-149.
“Food Deserts” are arears where people have a hard time finding affordable, healthy food. These places are usually low-income neighborhoods that do not have any supermarkets nearby but have convenience stores that sell junk food and fast food places around them. Ron Finley, a guerrilla gardener, lives in a “food desert” in South Central Los Angeles. He plants fruit and vegetable gardens to help nourish his community with healthy eating. In the article “Giving the Poor Easy Access to Healthy Food Doesn’t Mean They’ll Buy It,” Margot Sanger-Katz states that “merely adding a grocery store to a poor neighborhood doesn’t make a very big difference” because the diets of the residents living in those neighborhoods did not change. I think “food deserts” are only a part of the bigger problem in America because obesity is everywhere, not just in low-income
“What should we have for dinner?” (Pollan 1). Michael Pollan, in his book The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals shows how omnivores, humans, are faced with a wide variety of food choices, therefore resulting in a dilemma. Pollan shows how with new technology and food advancement the choice has become harder because all these foods are available at all times of the year. Pollan portrays to his audience this problem by following food from the food chain, to industrial food, organic food, and food we forage ourselves; from the source to a final meal and, lastly he critiques the American way of eating. Non-fiction books should meet certain criterions in order to be successful. In his book The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals, Michael Pollan is able to craft an ineffective piece of non-argumentative non-fiction due to a lack of a clear purpose stated at the outset of the book, as well as an inability to engage the reader in the book due to the over-excessive use of technical jargon as well as bombarding the reader with facts.
A major issue that is occurring in America is a phenomena known as “food deserts”, most are located in urban areas and it's difficult to buy affordable or good-quality fresh food. Whereas in the past, food deserts were thought to be solved with just placing a grocery store in the area, but with times it has become an issue that people are not picking the best nutritional option. This issue is not only making grocery store in food deserts are practically useless and not really eliminating the issue of food deserts because even when they are given a better nutritional option, and people are not taking it. In my perspective, it takes more than a grocery store to eliminate ‘food deserts’. It's more about demonstrating the good of picking the nutritional option and how it can help them and their families. For example, “Those who live in these areas are often subject to poor diets as a result and are at a greater risk of becoming obese or developing chronic diseases.”(Corapi, 2014).
Throughout the essay, Berry logically progresses from stating the problem of the consumer’s ignorance and the manipulative food industry that plays into that ignorance, to stating his solution where consumers can take part in the agricultural process and alter how they think about eating in order to take pleasure in it. He effectively uses appeals to emotion and common values to convince the reader that this is an important issue and make her realize that she needs to wake up and change what she is doing. By using appeals to pathos, logos, and ethos, Berry creates a strong argument to make his point and get people to change how they attain and eat food.
Take a stroll through the dining halls all around campus, discarded plates and food all left for the custodian to pick up and contributing to food waste on campus. In Stony Brook University’s the Statesman article, “Students need to step up to reduce food waste on our campus,” Matthew Yan emphasizes the point that people who are environmentally or economically conscious should be furious about food waste In addition, he claims that wasting food on campus that has being paid for makes no sense. Yan relied on building his credibility by using personal narrative and trustworthy sources, which has the effect of appealing to the reader's emotions regarding the issue. Overall, Yan’s argument was very sound, even though the inclusion of condescending tone and lack of different perspectives somewhat weakened his argument since it might have been a turn off to readers who had different opinions.
They discovered that the nourished kids were fed the same amount of food, but four times a day, whereas the malnourished kids were only eating twice a day. They also discovered that the mothers were hand feeding the nourished kids versus communal style eating that the malnourished children were experiencing. That was not all, the better-nourished kids " mothers were collecting tiny shrimp and crabs from the rice paddies and mixing them in with their kid’s rice” and “tossed in sweet-potato greens, which were considered a low-class food” (Heath, Heath, 2010, p. 30). Jerry Sternin didn't share the results with the entire community but instead encouraged the local community to come up with a program that taught the people how to make the healthy food and how to space out meals. The health of the community began to change, and children soon became nourished. The important lessons of this story are that
What is this article all about, will it tell us how to find food, how to forage, how to get a renewable and sustainable food source developed. No, it is about how the mind works, how priorities get