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In today’s society, infidelity is one of the leading causes of marital disruption and divorce. In accordance with societal norms many myths have been associated with infidelity. The following myths and their effects on marriage will be discussed: Everyone has affairs, the affair is the direct result of the faithful mate and, the marriage must end in divorce. In examining the various myths, this paper will challenge the greater issue, can marriage survive infidelity?
There was a time when more smart-conscious decisions were made relating to sexual relationships. In particular, sexual relationships within a marriage. However, times have changed. The pillars that hold up our individual sexual values have started to crumble. It is estimated that two out of three marriages fail due to infidelity. This is a scary statistic considering that people believe a marriage can survive infidelity. This brings us to our first myth: Everyone has affairs.
People tend to associate with others who share the same values and morals as they do. People who are unfaithful tend to assume that everyone is, while those who remain faithful tend to believe that extramarital affairs are unusual. Since infidelity takes on several different forms, it is appropriate to consider the fact that many people believe that this sort of behaviour would be considered acceptable.
The first form of adultery is Accidental Infidelity. This can happen to the more careless person, but at the same time, to the person whose values and commitments are tenuous. They lack self-control and respect for both themselves and their spouse. Any situation where they are left alone with the opposite sex is an opportunity for an “accident” to occur. It was shocking to find out that most cases of infidelity occur with couples who are less than twenty -five years old, one would have thought early marriages where happy and care free (figure one).
The second form of adultery is the Romantic Affair. This is usually considered the most disruptive affair because it involves such intense feelings and is a big threat to a marriage. The Romantic Affair usually occurs at a point of crisis in a marriage and is short-lived; it usually burns out quickly.
The last type of affair that is common in several relationships is Philandering. It is known as co...
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... Imagine how difficult it would be to trust one’s spouse again. It would be like starting all over. Many believe that “once a cheat always a cheat”, people who have several affairs have a higher divorce rate (figure 7). One would have to put forth time, and effort to restore something that they did not destroy. All of the years of marriage, all that was shared and considered sacred is gone. How can one be expected to believe that the affair was an isolated incident that never took place earlier on in the marriage? It is with all of these doubts and unanswered questions that it becomes evident that adultery destroys marriages and therefore marriage cannot survive infidelity. Infidelity not only destroys marriages, it also destroys families. Children turn away from their mothers or fathers, and it is at that point that the marriage should be considered null and void. The possibility of a marriage being able to survive infidelity is far fetched. Therefore, the answer to the question: ‘can marriage survive infidelity’ is evident.
It simply cannot, too much has been lost. Perhaps Edgar Allan Poe sums it up best: “Years of love have been forgot in the hatred of a minute.”
Instead of directly answering the question, the author is attempting to understand the different components and details of adultery and sexual immorality. The analysis is evaluating moral and immoral actions and behaviour when it comes to marriage. According to Wasserstrom (1985), “immorality of such things as breaking a promise, deceiving someone,
In short story “The Cheater’s Guide to Love,” written by Junot Diaz, we observe infidelity and the negative effects it has on relationships. Anyone who cheats will eventually get caught and will have to deal with the consequences. People tend to overlook the fact that most relationships are unlikely to survive after infidelity. Trust becomes an issue after someone has been unfaithful. Yunior, the main character in this story, encounters conflict as he struggles to move on with his life after his fiancée discovers that he has been unfaithful. Over a six-year period, the author reveals how his unfaithfulness has an effect on his health and his relationships.
Clearly, this essay has shown that the main factors which impact upon adultery being acceptable is being loyal, loving, and forgiveness. Adultery in all reality is actually a terrible thing and is frowned upon, but The Crucible and The Scarlet Letter prove adultery is acceptable in many ways. Life is like a pen, so any mistake made will never be able to be erased or taken back.
The faithful spouse must be tough and stand up to the unfaithful spouse if the marriage will be saved and adultery prevented from happening. As we discussed already the natural response of the rejected spouse is to beg, plead, or become a doormat, but these approaches will only serve to confuse the unfaithful spouse more. If however pulls back and maintains a confident, independent composure the cool spouse will begin to rethink his decisions of unfaithfulness and wishing to leave. “The third change occurs not in the mind of the cool spouse but in the mind of the vulnerable one. Incredibly, he feels better- somehow more in control of the situation.” The vulnerable person begins to respect themselves instead of relying on their partner to fulfil their needs of being wanted. Taking the independent confident approach is not easy, but with prayer and a Christian counselor the vulnerable spouse can learn how to use tough love to save his or her marriage. Doctor Dobson advocates that the vulnerable spouse should force the crisis to a head in most situations of infidelity and clearly draw the lines of what he will do if his spouse is unfaithful again. The vulnerable spouse must then be willing to care out those ultimatums or the unfaithful spouse will simply continue to walk over the other as a doormat. “Just as toddlers and teenagers will challenge authority of their parents
In this paper I am writing about marriage and infidelity in modern life and the books we have read in class. Marriage is a mutual bond in which a man and a woman decide to be with each other until they die. Infidelity is basically when the man or woman in a relationship cheat on the other person, without them knowing.
In today’s society, adultery is not viewed as it would have been viewed back in the 1600’s. Adultery is defined as a voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not his or her spouse. In society today, people understand that it is not right to commit adultery, despite knowing that it is often done more. Adultery is committed more now, in the view of its not a punishable act, as it was in the 1600’s. Committing adultery in the 1600’s was considered committing one of the sins that can not be forgiven. Many people were killed for this type of act, however as generations past people begin to view adultery differently.
...sh and adore. However, next time, do not let yourself be so easily grabbed by the catchy musical numbers and seemingly revolutionary story that is told. Yes, Mulan is an unorthodox heroine who changes all the rules, but she does so by conforming to a flawed system and affecting change from the inside, under the guise of a man. In lieu of doing it as a woman, it is not as girl power filled as many of us would like to believe. She, for the most part, affects all of this change as a man. Once she’s discovered, all her hard work in the training and the relationships she’s forged are all tossed to the wind and she’s quickly relegated back to her place as a lowly woman. However, despite its flawed execution in being a girl power story, it embodies a quintessential feel-good, be true to your heart film that will leave you wanting to affect change in the world around you.
A man has been married to his wife for seven years. The couple has two beautiful children, a fabulous home, and appear to have the perfect marriage. After the husband leaves work one afternoon, he decides to stop in at the local bar. The man sits at a table in the corner of the room. Not long after his arrival, a woman approaches him. She asks the man if she can join him at his table. The two seem to have quite a bit in common and enjoy each other’s company. The woman asks if he would like to go back to her apartment. He has not had a fight with his wife today. In fact, she surprised him with a love note in his briefcase. Their sex life is enjoyable, frequent, and without complaint. The couple is not currently having financial problems. Despite this, why did the man decide to leave with a stranger and cheat on his wife? A great deal of research has been carried out on the topic of infidelity. Marital therapists have reported that more than half of the couples they counsel are in therapy as a result of infidelity (Atkins, Jacobson citation). Therapists also consider an extramarital affair as, “one of the most damaging relationship events and one of the most difficult problems to treat in couples therapy” (whisman predicting sexual infidelity…). Some therapists estimate that 50% to 65% of couples seek help after an incident of infidelity in their relationship (Atkins, Jacobson & Baucom). Identifying the reasons for this problem are essential to the success of its reduction. Infidelity is not a new phenomenon. However, there was little research on the topic until the late 1970’s (Drigotas & Barta, 2001). Numerous factors have been examined while trying to determine the root cause for extramarital relationships a...
There are many activities that take place online today. These stem from watching explicitly sexual materials, to talking about sex – from having sex chat with others to becoming sexually aroused. Most affairs start off somewhat innocently, but soon grow in nature. This is quite different from in the past when things rushed forward because affairs typically started in the workplace. Clearly, much has changed, including the meaning of infidelity itself.
Infidelity is depicted as an extremely negative thing in the United States, and is often blamed for trust issues, psychologically damaging the spouse and their children, tearing apart marriages and families and more. People who commit adultery are often shamed and told how wrong what they did is and what a terrible person they are for doing it. According to the Journal of Martial and Family by the Associated Press, however, 41% of “marriages where one or both spouses admit to infidelity, either physical or emotional.” Clearly, while infidelity is generally viewed negative by society, many people either decide that it is not as negative as it is portrayed, or do not care and do it anyway. “The Lady with the Pet Dog” and “The Storm” both go against the typical view of adultery being a negative thing in a relationship by showing that it can actually have a beneficial outcome and leave some, if not all people happier.
According to recent statistics, there are more divorces now than ever before. At the rate things are going, the divorce rate may soon surpass the marriage rate. There are many reasons for such a high divorce rate, but one of the main ones is that people do not realize what they are getting themselves into when they marry. Couples do not realize that marriage is a job that must be worked at continuously in order for it to go well. Because many couples marry for the wrong reasons, a breakdown in communication results, which leads to a couple's growing apart. This process, all too often, ends in divorce.
Marriage is a very joyful event in a person’s life. However, unless much can be done in order to redefine the status of what marriage is all about, divorce and other marital problems will continue to arise tremendously. Divorce is tumultuous event in a married couple’s life. It does not only affect the financial status of the household, but rather it also affects the people that comprises the family especially the children. Families are experiencing many problems today, but the role of divorce in this picture has been frequently overlooked because its destructive effects have been subtle, yet insidious. When the divorce rate increased in the 1960s, few would have predicted its dire consequences three decades later. Yet divorce has changed both the structure and the impact of the family. Intimacy, time, effort trust and love is the key to have a peaceful and healthy relationship. Marriage for life is God's ideal, but divorce is a reality in our society.
Adultery is a horrible sin to commit, but it can actually be avoided, although many people in today's society respond differently based on their religion and culture. When a person commits adultery they fail in keeping his/her commitment to their partner. When adultery happens the trust is broken in the relationship and the other person will feel deceived and betrayed.
Mulan seems to be a feminist film which encourages individual women to take care of themselves. However, the film is not free from traditional gender roles. While the film may be progressive by removing the "damsel in distress" plot, further analysis shows it isn’t a feminist film at all. Disney’s Mulan reinforces a black and white societal role of gender that privilege men over women. In contrast the poem is incredibly progressive, it shows a woman fighting just as well as men and men accepting her as a powerful warrior not being jealous of her power. The poem removes gender roles whereas the Disney movie reinforces them.
The Immorality of Adultery Sex is believed, by some, to be a universal language, one that is free