How Did James Mcbride Become Afraid Of White People In The 60's?

Through James McBride's lifetime, growing up he has always wondered why he and his mother didn't look alike at all since he was black and she was white, questioning the fact if she was even his real mother. As a young boy, James is often curious about the unspoken life that his mother once had, a secret perhaps, a unheard of life never talked about or perhaps a forgotten past. Since his mother never talked about her childhood and other basic information about where she grew up and what life was like, James grew up such a curious child because of the fact he and his mother were completely different skin colors and when he asks his mom if god was black or white, she says “God is the color of water, water doesn't have a color” ( 51). In James

McBride's, The Color of Water, James is well aware of his mother's secret past since he and his mother Ruth had never talked about it. It takes him years to figure out who his mother's family was, where they have gone, and what her life was like growing up after questioning her many times throughout his life. However James starts off with little knowledge of his family background, he has always been quite curious about his mother and why they had looked so different from each other. He gains insight of his family background and identity through society and the upcoming black power movement, people outside of his family, and through conversations with his mother Ruth.
First off, James starts to figure out his identity through time and personal growth.

With recent collaboration about black people and the popular civil right activists, the black power movement had helped James figure out much more information about himself especially because he was black, “ Most white folks I knew seemed to have a great fear of blacks” (31). The reason why most white people were afraid of black people in the 60’s is because there was the upcoming black power movement which led many people to think there would be a rise in tensions among black people and white people meaning there can be an increase in violence. But being black and having a white mother led James to quickly realize what other people thought about him and his family, “I could see it in the faces of the white people who stared at me and Mommy and my siblings when we rode the subway, sometimes laughing at us, pointing, muttering things like, Look at her with those little niggers” (31). At the time it was considered wrong and disturbing for black people and white people to have relationships together or even be around each other without receiving racist remarks. Its significant how James as a young boy, is able to piece together clues to figure out who he is, with and without his

family.
Eventually as time goes by, James learns much more about his mother's secret past. However he doesn't hear about it from his mother, he hears it from other people he meets, specifically a man named Eddie Thompson, “ I knew the whole family” (207). Eddie Thompson was a sixty six year old black man who lived in Suffolk and told James a big part of who his mother was and what her family was like because he grew up in the same neighborhood as Ruth. After leaving Eddie Thompson's house James talks to a man named Aubrey Rubenstein who is the son of the owner who took over of his mother Ruth’s store after the Shilsky family had left, “ It was not that easy a place for a Jew to live. It was a tiny population of Jews. Most were merchants of one type or another. I suppose some found it easier to make a living elsewhere” (225). That gave James an idea of what life was like back then for his mother since at that time being Jewish was considered lower than the other categories of white. It's crazy how after many years and James being old enough to travel down to Suffolk, that there's only a small amount of Jewish people who remain but also how he had learned more from them then his mother.
With this in mind, James learns about his mother after his many years of questioning her, until one day she finally answers.

It's not until he’s writing a story about his mother’s life as a grown man, where Ruth decides to talk about it with James instead of pushing it away, “There was no turning back after my mother died. I stayed on the black side because that was the only place I could stay” (232). Ruth tells James how she stayed on the black side yet no matter what the occasion was she faced forms of racisms for being white in a black neighborhood but for also having a black boyfriend. Once again at the time it was pretty much forbidden for blacks and whites to be together because of segregation, “You weren't accepted to be with a black man and that was that. They'd say forget it” (232). Ruth didn't care, but society did and later on she would marry another black man who would marry her and end up being James father along with his siblings. Its interesting how after a long period of time, Ruth decides to tell James once and for all her

story.
To conclude, James starts off with little knowledge of his family background, he has always been curious about why he and his mother had looked so different from each other. He gains insight of his family background through society and the upcoming black power movement, people outside of his family, and through his mother Ruth. In The Color of Water the search for identity seems to be one of the biggest themes in the story since it's tells us about how James figures out who he, but also who his mother is. But alongside the search for identity, community plays a big role in identity also since the black community is what Ruth for more comfortable in, leading to the creation of the church, her marrying black men, and having one of the most successful families who grew up with very little, showed how education helped them find their identities. Ultimately, James Mcbride's awareness of his mother's unspoken past along with his relationship with his her has influenced his visual on the world and his identity tremendously.