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Conflict and Conflict Management
What we talk about when we talk about love analysis
Intra conflict and communication
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Recommended: Conflict and Conflict Management
In theory, people make decisions about becoming involved, romantically or
otherwise, with other people based upon a number of criteria with which they
evaluate the qualities of the other person. In some situations an individual may
consciously think about the criteria, or qualities, they are looking for in that
individual and then evaluate if the person meets the criteria. In most cases
however the person does not consciously think out this process, but simply
"knows" if he or she likes the other person or not. In some cases, the
most important criteria, at least initially, are surface type attributes, such
as race, appearance, or material wealth. In addition, the individual will
sometimes intuitively know that the other individual is not appropriate to start
a relationship with but is overwhelmed with the surface appearance. For all of
these reasons relationships will sometimes fail since the initial evaluation can
be based upon qualities that are not truly the most important for a long lasting
relationship. I will try to show that based upon two characters in American
Knees, their relationships failed, or at least struggled, since they had not
explored the most important qualities of the other person. A second sub-thesis
of this discussion relates to relationships that are chosen for individuals. For
example, a mother, father, sibling would fit into this category. In these
situations, the individual does not do the same type of evaluation since there
is no decision needed to become involved in the relationship. However, at some
point in the life of an individual they actually do recognize that a relative
meets, or does not meet, the most important criteria for a long lasting
relationship. In these cases...
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...nting my mother...And I was ashamed." That shows how
truly humiliated the young Beccah was during this episode. She even admonishes
herself since she did nothing to protect her mother "from the children's
sharp-toothed barbs". Beccah decides to run off and escape from this
situation, much like she wishes she could run away from her whole life with her
mother. My argument is that Beccah at points in her life recognized many
characteristics that she did not like and that made Beccah's life much more
difficult. She intuitively knew that her mother did not posses some of the
qualities she desired and this frustrated her. While at the end of the story,
Beccah learns to feel love for her mother (given her tragic circumstances), it
is clear that she was angered, frustrated, and embarrassed at times- and at some
level wished she could have had a different parent.
Robert Nozick’s Love’s Bond is a clear summary of components, goals, challenges, and limitations of romantic love. Nozick gives a description of love as having your wellbeing linked with that of someone and something you love. I agree with ideas that Nozick has explained concerning the definition of love, but individuals have their meaning of love. Every individual has a remarkable thing that will bring happiness and contentment in their lives. While sometimes it is hard to practice unconditional love, couples should love unconditionally because it is a true love that is more than infatuation and overcomes minor character flaw.
Love: a small, four-lettered word that oozes with possibility. What is love? The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines love as “a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person.” However, can love really be defined? In the short story “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love,” by Raymond Carver, the four main characters discuss just that: what is love? Terri, in particular, has a unique perspective on love. This is exemplified in the beginning of the story, when Terri is introduced: “Terri said the main she lived with before she lived with Mel loved her so much he tried to kill her,” (Carver 170). Terri’s dominant impression is that she is an easily influenced and manipulated character that is the most convinced and clear about
In order to distinguish the difference between loving and liking, questionnaire should be undergone. Firstly, the love-scale should be set which referred to the association response from the questionnaire. Some questionnaire items had to be provided according to the attitude of the respondents toward the target person. The questionnaire represented the personal visions of two panels of students and faculty about the ideas of love and like. It contained theoretical thinking and pointed to the three elements of love mentioned in paragraph one. The questionnaire items included two categories, like and love and questionnaires were distributed to 158 dating couples at the University of Michigan. The results found that love and like were more strongly related among males than females and it gave some proofs for the suggestion that it was more illustrious for women to differentiate the two emotions than men. The results also showed that women like their male friends more than other side like them. Moreover, women were prone to say love to same-sex friends more than men and those might be some kinds of the gender differe...
Love is portrayed in numerous mediums: song, history, rhythmic dance, or poetry. These four instruments of love typically identify the notion as subjective, lifeless, and static. Song writer of this age often convey love as a goal in life not as an element of living. While people from different periods in history used love to gain power giving love a bare and emotionless personnel. And lastly dance and poetry perceives love as inaudible and plain, because the vary performers and authors have not experienced love on an intimate or divine level. However William Shakespeare is one of few to frequently incorporate simple, yet complex terminology in sonnets to convey different concepts of love. The comprehensive
Karen Horney “Distrust between sexes” proceeds go into the different aspects of Love and Relationships. In this book Horney gives examples on how women deal with emotions which transitions from childhood to adult life. The fundamentals of documentation are displayed in unavoidable ways in most occurrences people run into. People are blind to the fact that love in relationships can be destroyed by overt or covert? In some cases lack of sympathy is then blamed, when relationships don’t work out between two individuals. Some couples fall into social, economic defaults which impacts the relationships. These are issues people never stop to think about, all they want to do is shift the blame to one another in a relationship. Self-preservation is a basic instinct for everyone and is present at birth. This can enhance the natural fear of losing ourselves in a relationship (Horney 1930). In Horney discussions I found that a person only feels despair because of the deep emotions of abundant from “Love” during childhood. That can develop more mixed emotions that turn into mistrust, which causes delusions that tell them they are not getting love from their partner (Horney 1930). With these types of feelings mistrust sips into relationships, starting from a child carries over into adult life. Reasons are when a child comes into the world learns everything it needs to know from its parent. If the child’s emotional needs are not taken care of when the family increases, the child will feel a need to compete for affection from the parents, which could turn into a painful situation. With this being said the child grows into an adult with suppressed aggression. If he/she has not learned how to deal with...
Despite these works being written over centuries apart, the authors correlation of the concepts of love were notable. Plato’s Symposium was composed of different views regarding their definitions of love, while Carver’s “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” focuses on what a group of friends talk about on the topic of love. Both pieces contain groups of people discussing their ideologies and relatable experiences, which in the end emphasize the complexity and variety of this emotion. Even though these literary pieces were written over two thousand years apart, similarities could be found within them regarding the concepts of dying for love as well as acknowledging the different forms of love that exist.
In Aldrous Huxley’s A Brave New World, pleasure is the main driving force in life. The government uses tools such as the wonder drug soma and the endorphins naturally released during and after sexual intercourse to keep the minds of their well-tended flock off of matters that might concern them if they had not previously been conditioned to resort to a vice the moment that they begin to conceive an ill thought. Lenina 's adulation of John, the Savage, is perhaps one of the more obvious triggers of soma usage within the novel. Lenina does not understand John 's concept of love, and attempts to show her affection in the only way she knows how, and that is by having sex with him. She thinks this is a normal act, but for him, it is sanctity. John believes that one should only express their passion through sex if they are married as is the custom on the reservation. This leads John to call Lenina many obscene names and to send her into the tender arms of soma instead. She merely wishes him to reciprocate her advances, which she would take as meaning that he was happy to be with her. She simply wants the both of them to be joyous in their carnal revelry but “Happiness is a hard master – particularly other people 's happiness. A much harder master, if one isn 't conditioned to accept it unquestioningly, than truth” (Huxley 227, Brave New World). John and Lenina are very different people however, as Lenina tells Bernard “I don 't understand … why you don 't take
Ninety percent of Americans marry by the time that they are fifty; however, forty to fifty percent of marriages end in divorce ("Marriage and Divorce"). Love and marriage are said to go hand in hand, so why does true love not persist? True, whole-hearted, and long-lasting love is as difficult to find as a black cat in a coal cellar. Loveless marriages are more common than ever, and the divorce rate reflects this. The forms of love seen between these many marriages is often fleeting. Raymond Carver explores these many forms of love, how they create happiness, sadness, and anything in between, and how they contrast from true love, through his characters in "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love". Four couples are presented: Mel and Terri, Nick and Laura, Ed and Terri, and, most importantly, an unnamed elderly couple; each couple exhibits a variation on the word love.
Love has been the cause of some of the greatest feats, discoveries, and battles in the history of man. It has driven men to insanity and despair, while it has lead others to happiness and bliss. This idea that love has a strong influence on man’s decisions can be seen in the poem, “Love is not all” by Edna St. Vincent Millay. The most prominent theme presented in “Love is not all” is that although love is not a necessity of life, it somehow manages to provoke such great desire and happiness that it becomes important.
For many years, love has been argued as to whether it is a feeling or a choice. We experience love in all shapes in forms through family, friends, or significant others. But what is the true, desirable definition of love? You would be surprised with how much this four letter word means to the world and how much it could affect your life. I believe love is something unique and special that most people cannot live without. If you feel as if these characteristics don't exist in your life, then what will you have in the end? (Odo 66) But then again love isn't just about the “magic” you have for someone, but about how to make it work and to keep that meaning alive, and about learning to love yourself before you love others.
The Definition of Love Love by definition is an emotion explored in philosophy, religion, and literature, often as either romantic love, the fraternal love of others, or the love of God based on the definition found in The Encarta Encyclopedia. As I explored the definitions through the Internet, books, and articles, I noticed the definitions changed quite a bit, but yet had the same basic understanding. The definition I found in The Encarta Encyclopedia is probably the most simple and most basic. It refers to love in the whole aspect, which is Godly, fraternal, and romantic. All of which can only be defined by one word and that is love.
Passionate love is based on drive. Couples in passionate love feel physically attracted to each other. Sexual desire is typically a component of passionate love. Passionate love is not limited to sexual attraction, however. It is a way for couples to express feelings of nurture, dominance, submission, self-actualization, etc![4] Passionate love is considered the "hot" component of love because of the strong presence of arousal between two people. Sternberg believed that passionate love will diminish as the positive force of the relationship is taken over by opposite forces. This idea comes from Solomon's opponent-force theory[5]!
Some people believe that there is no such thing as “true love” they believe that love is nothing but an illusion designed by social expectations. These people believe that love ultimately turns into pain and despair. This idea in some ways is true. Love is not eternal it will come to an end one way or another, but the aspect that separates true love from illusion, is the way love ends. “True Love” is much too powerful to be destroyed by Human imperfection; it may only be destroyed by a force equal to the power of love. Diotima believed that “Love is wanting to posses the good forever” In other words love is the desire to be immortal and the only way that we are able to obtain immortality is through reproduction, and since the act of reproduction is a form of sexual love, then sexual love is in fact a vital part of “True love”. Sexual love is not eternal. This lust for pleasure will soon fade, but the part of love that is immortal, is a plutonic love. You can relate this theory to the birth of love that Diotima talks about. She says that love was born by a mortal mother and immortal father. The mother represents the sexual love, the lust for pleasure. The father represents the plutonic love that is immortal. Plutonic love is defined as a true friendship, the purest of all relationships. A true plutonic love will never die; it transcends time, space, and even death.
What exactly is love? Is there an absolute meaning to the word - love? Or is it purely subjective? The concept of true love is what we search for all our lives. Yet love is one of the most misunderstood concepts of all. What people really want more than anything else is to be loved unconditionally; to be accepted for who we are, and still be loved. Sometimes we will do some crazy things, "in the name of love."
An example of this might be going to dinner or the movies with a prospective mate, rather than the casual encounters that someone might have with them in everyday interactions. Intimacy does not only pertain to specific acts, but also to verbal and non-verbal expressions of love. Although verbal expressions of intimate feelings through self-disclosure are important to relationship quality, the nonverbal expression appears to be more important. In general, people rely more on nonverbal than verbal cues to interpret messages. Some examples of these nonverbal cues include touch, gaze, gestures, and time spent together.