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Forgiveness is the act of releasing an offender of any wrong or hurt they may have caused you whether they deserve it or not. It is a decision to let go of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group of people. When we choose to forgive, we’re wiping the slate clean, cancelling a debt, or as I love to say, “Letting it go.” In the Bible, the Greek word for forgiveness literally means to “let it go.” This concept, “forgiveness,” is easier said than done. Majority of people find it very difficult to let go of offenses and hurts caused by others. I really do believe that most people desire to let it go, but we lack the knowledge of how to do it. As believers, we are instructed by God maintain an attitude of forgiveness. The act of …show more content…
Steven Standiford, chief of surgery at the Cancer Treatment Centers of America, says that unforgiveness can make people sick. Emotional wounds are more harmful to our health than we realize. Built up anger will weaken your immune system causing you to feel sick more often. For this reason, we must make forgiveness a lifestyle rather than a one-time event. We must learn how to surrender the burden of anger and resentment over to God and allow Him to heal the wounds caused by others. When we forgive from our hearts, we will begin to experience the peace of God in our souls. Unforgiveness is an unnecessary weight that we carry around not realizing that it’s weighing us down and hindering our growth.
It’s very difficult to move forward in life when you are burdened with anger and bitterness. Unforgiveness alters your perspective and in turn influences your responses and decisions in life. For example, a person that’s been carrying around bitterness for years will be inclined to view the motives and actions of others through the lenses of unforgiveness. Because they haven’t forgiven their offenders, they tend to be paranoid and suspect of other peoples’ intentions. This behavior will cause you to lose friends and even prevent you from making new
Forgiveness is a process. You can still feel the pain, see the events behind your eyes, and feel the loss of the people around you but you have to find a way to forgive. People think that if you forgive someone you are forgetting or saying hey I would hang out with this person now because we’re cool but thats not at all what forgiveness is. Forgiveness is righting the wrong for yourself because you want the injustice you feel to leave. It’s acknowledging to that there a wrong that was done to you and you decide how you want to think about it not anyone
As humans, we are entitled to making mistakes in our lives, but by forgiving one free himself from anger. Marianne Williamson wrote this about forgiveness: “ Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.” In the book The Glass Castle undergoes many difficult circumstances in which the act of forgiveness is the only way to be at peace with her family, but more importantly herself. But the real question is does she truly forgive them. Jeanette’s ability to constantly forgive her parents enabled her to have a positive attitude because the negativity was released when
Forgiving someone is a way to release us from the pain they have brought us. Justice can just be
“Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail to our in patience, then it races like gazelle when you can’t catch a breath.” Simon Birch. Time is very stable but with our emotions it makes it seem like you can never catch up or it taking too long. Forgiveness can feel this way to both victim and one who’s in the wrong. Forgiveness is very difficult thing to do certain times and takes time. Some may think justice helps or makes one forgive because of the punishment or karma and it makes everything better. But I would ask yourself are you truly forgiving one for the wrongs or are you just dismissing it. Justice and forgiveness do not go hand-in-hand. Justice is not forgiveness because to forgive someone or something for what they have done needs to come from our not from what happens to them for their punishment or karma.
Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feeling and attitude regarding an offense; let’s go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender. Walter (1984) stated that forgiveness is a voluntary process that usually requires courage and multiple acts of the will to complete. In Walters' view, the person who has been hurt has two alternatives: to be destroyed by resentment which leads to death, or to forgive which leads to healing and life. Sonja Lyubomirsky calls forgiveness is a natural resolution of the grief process, which is the necessary acknowledgment of pain and loss. It is a powerful choice that can lead to greater well being and better relationships.
In a clinical setting, patients sometimes suffer from a multitude of illnesses and bad experiences that lead them to look for external help. Many experiences that patients go through are very difficult to socially, personally and lots of times mentally as well. Therefore, Psychologists must look at the whole of the issue that is causing individuals stress. The first thing you will hear from psychologists regarding forgiveness is the matter of whether it would even be safe for the patient to make contact and forgive the wrong-doer. Much of therapy is concerned with making the patient feel better before anyone else. This means that forgiveness of a person that may still hurt them could be out of question. Although it may be hard to forgive someone for the wrongs they have done to you, it may be extremely worth-while from the psychologist perspective. According to Frise and McMinn, patients may benefit psychologically from forgiving the person that has wronged them because they can “release negative painful feelings and thoughts and move forward without the hindrance of unforgiveness” (2010). As you can see, Psychologists walk more of a balance between the goodness of forgiveness and the harm that it can do to those that are not ready for
Justice and forgiveness are two topics that are interpreted differently by many people. Many people forgive, but many other people only seek justice. They can’t go hand-in-hand together though. People are not capable of forgiving while they also seek justice toward a person. Forgiveness is led by sorrow to a person while justice is revenge based. Many who seek justice can not resist the temptation of revenge but those who seek to forgive show strength by doing the right thing.
Some people may argue that forgiving is a responsibility that others should have. Forgiving is a hard process that may make people go through a lot of stress and pain, but forgiving is also time consuming. People who are hurt by others don’t always have the responsibility to forgive others.
As I sit here thinking about was forgiveness means to me. I have come to realize that holding in hate is harmful and the outcome physically and mentally could cause undesirable effects. Although, the process of forgiveness can take many years and the process may start with you. The whole process shouldn’t be seen as an obligation, but a remedy to help with your recovery.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you have to become friends with the other person, rather it allows you to let go of that heavy burden you feel inside. It allows you to muddle through the difficulties in your life without causing another issue.
Forgiveness is empathy. I believe it means, putting ones self in the position of the other person, and wiping away any sort of resentment and antagonism we feel toward them. Forgiveness is a journey to freedom. Forgiveness works directly on the emotion of anger, resentment, hostility, and hatred by diminishing its intensity or level within the mind and heart. Only the one who is wronged can forgive.
A strong Christian lesson on the true nature of forgiveness can be found in Christ’s Sermon on the Mount:
Asking to forgive is often considered as hard words and it rarely comes out from anybody’s mouth. However, when said, it gets harder to ignore the same. In our lifetime we have been on both the sides. We might have asked somebody to forgive or somebody could have asked us to forgive them. However, the emotional concern often results from unforgiveness. When you do not forgive a person or if somebody does not forgive you, it often leads to bitterness, resentment, hated and anger. Many families often develop depression as well as social behavioral problems due to hatred and anger. In a few cases it has led to serious issues like murder.
I have also Learnt and accepted that the desire for revenge only brings heartache, turmoil and agitation, especially when we have experienced life filled with moments of pains and disappointments. Being on the receiving end of some unkind treatment, which was not always easy to just let go or move on-especially when you find yourself feeling maltreated and angered by trusted friends and family members. Then we become so afraid to make new friends and relationships because of our past experiences, which affect our lives. We try to protect ourselves by building a fence around us to avoid reoccurring offenses and to prevent people from getting close to us to avoid getting hurt again. Furthermore, we should learn how to embrace ourselves and place ourselves in a situation without stress, anger, regret, self-pity or judgement. Having realized that, if I have not forgiven, part of my inner strength would be caged in anger, resentment, pain or stress of some kind. Forgiveness has strengthened the goodness within me which has helped me to become more active in life. I have no shame or regrets in developing positive attitude over bad feelings. While others may not understand why I constantly forgive after being angry for such a long time, the healing power of forgiveness allows me to truly move
Has someone that is a close relative or friend ever been taken away and never to return? The only way you can see or speak with them is by looking at a tomb stone. This is one of the most painful experiences any human being will go through. Most people do not even realize the forgiving and not coping with the pain is a key step in healing and letting go. But if one fails to do so they will be bitter, angry and cold heart for the rest of their life.