Effects Of Divorce On Children

Divorce and its effects 10/10

Knowing someone who has been in a courtroom and signed papers to get a divorce isn't a rare thing anymore.Once you're married there is over a 55% chance in the U.S that your new found love will end in divorce. The U.S had the fourth highest divorce rate with Maldives topping the list. While a divorce is between two people, its effects can land on many of the people closest to them. Children are the most dramatically impacted, when children are involved there is both good and bad effects on them.

The holidays are one of the hardest times for children whose parents are divorced. Not only do they have to haul everyday items back and forth, but they also have to take all of the presents they have received along with, gifts sometimes add another layer of frustration (Italie 2013). There is also a lot of tension around the holidays, both parents are wanting to spend time with their children but they can only be one place at a time. Holidays also often become a competition between parents on who can give the best gift. When parents try

to be better than the other it ruins the holidays for all.
Often times when a family gets a divorce the children or child ends up spending more time with one of their parents, most often it being their mother.

When a child loses contact with their father they lose an important part of developing. These children become violent and struggle with things more.This tends to affect more of the male children. Boys and girls at age 9 are almost equally likely to commit suicide; by age 14, boys are twice as likely; by 19, four times; by 24, more than five times (Farrell 2015). Thoughts of suicide are only the beginning, when they lose their father they have to step up and become a man on there own and they hold resentment for that. All but one of the 62 mass killings in the past 30 years was committed by boys or men (Farrell). Not always does this happen, often when a father is less involved the boy will step up and replace him correcting the things he saw his father

do.
The last thing someone thinks of when someone says divorce is its health effects. The stress and pain leading up to a divorce can be extreme and take its toll on your mind and body. Once it's finalized and you have removed yourself from an unhappy situation your self esteem and happiness will rise. When children see the good things that come from a divorce it makes up for all the stress. It also shows them that people make mistakes and they can learn from them to better their life. They also have the opportunity to learn how to properly behave and react should they find themselves in a similar situation down the road (Gross 2014). When you get a divorce you're removing yourself from a bad situation and modeling what a true healthy marriage looks like.
One of the best things that can come from a divorce is the closeness children gain with their parents. A child's continued involvement with both of his or her parents allows for realistic and better balanced future relationships (Corcoran 1997). When parents go separate ways most often children get to split their time between both parents, allowing them to spend more one on one time with mom and dad. While a child may have been closer to their mom before, they may become close to their father as well after spending quality time together. Often a separated parent will make an effort to spend quality time with the children and pay attention to their desires ( Corcoran 1997). When the parents put in effort to reconnect with their children after a divorce most often the child will reciprocate the effort back leading to a blossoming relationship.
As common as divorces are not always are they a destructive thing. Children can be affected in many good ways and also many unpleasant ways. It depends on how willing they are to accept change whether it be for the good or the bad.