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Consequences of divorce
Consequences of divorce
Consequences of divorce
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Divorce: Does the Pain Ever Stop?
Divorce is the termination of wedding vows and the cancelation of duties and responsibilities in which both people agreed by saying “I do” on their wedding day. Divorce is a frightening word for many or even a nightmare some never saw coming. When people hear the word divorce, most label it as a representation of failure; others symbolize divorce as putting their foot down and finally having the courage to leave behind a bond that was supposed to be unbreakable. Separation affects people in several different ways; some dread it others welcome it. While marriage is supposed to be a beautiful union between two individuals, divorce seems like an all too common life event. It is more than common in the United States, or even across the world. Parental divorce can be life changing. The whole family is affected but it has more negative effects on children weather minor or adult. The effects are more devastating for younger children.
In 2008 it was estimated that 40% of all marriages ended in divorce and 60% of second marriages would end also (Uphold-Carrier, Holly and Rebecca UTZ 2012 247-266). This is a sad statistic. There are some factors that may put people at risk for divorce such as: abuse, marrying at a young age, insecurities, religion, pregnancy, and affairs. Most of these problems can be prevented through commitment. Commitment is being dedicated to something or someone. Being committed could have a major impact on marriages. Although divorce may be the only option for some couples, others still try to hold on to their relationship due to financial issues.
Parental divorce can be a transforming experience. Who can imagine having two wonderful, happy, productive parents and awaken the ne...
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... we must find a way to stop the pain! We must accept that there is a natural order of things in this universe, marriage and the family is one of them. When we upset the order, the end result can make the difference in future generations.
Works Cited
Brotherson, Sean and Christina Rittenbach. “ Impacts of Parents Forever on Parental Behavior and Adjustment During Divorce: A Short-Term Follow-Up Evaluation Study.” Journal of Divorce & Remarriage 53 (2012): 267-291. Epscohosts. Web. 1 Mar. 2014
“Children in divorce proceedings increasingly need support with mental health issues.”theguardian.com. n.d. n.p. Web 12 Mar. 2014.
Uphold-Carrier, Holly and Rebecca UTZ. “Parental Divorce Among Young and Adult Children Long-Term Quantitative Analysis of Mental Health and Family Solidarity.” Journal of Divorce & Marriage 53 (2012): 247-266. Epscohosts. Web. 1 Mar. 2014
No one expects to divorce when they get married but nearly half of all marriages will end in divorce or separation. Divorce can be costly, with court fees and attorneys. Dr. Doherty, noted marriage scholar and therapist has determined a list of risk factors that are attributed to marital problems and divorce. The first three: Young age, less education and less income are coincidently other topics brushed upon in this paper. Impulsive decisions made by younger people to marry leads to children which leads to financial instability. Once a couple has children, they are unlikely to further their education because of lack of time. Divorce also has a negative effect on
Divorce causes an enormous amount of stress in the lives of many; according to the American Psychological Association, in America, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples divorce. For most parents, missing their kids on weekends, holidays, and vacations can be very stressful; the parents are often stressing about what the other parent is telling the child and who the other parent has around the child. In a divorce, most likely, there will be some increased financial stress for one spouse or both. Possibly the house, the cars, the accounts, and maybe the dogs could be divided within both parties; it may work out good for someone, but both individuals will inherit some unmerited stress. Knowing, as a parent, children are likely to suffer due to the removal from a natural environment causes pain to a loving parent; most important, the stress it causes to a kid can be unbearable. The decision to cancel a marriage can be very chaotic and traumatic to all parties
Divorce is a word that everyone knows very well, no matter what the age. These days, everyone knows at least one person that has either been in a divorce or whose parents are divorced. Today, about 50% of all marriages end in divorce('No-Fault' Divorce, 2004). Between the time that half of those couples get married and divorced, many of them had children. By 2004, "one in four children lived in single-parent homes"('No-Fault' Divorce, 2004). After the divorce, not only are the adults hurting, but the children are also. Throughout the divorce, the parents are caught up in each other, money, possessions, and their own pain that without even realizing it, their children are hurting too. Adults are becoming more careless and think less about how compatible they are to their partners. Some couples have children shortly after the wedding before they adjust to each other. After their children are born, the real problems start to become more relevant. With new problems surfacing and raising children at the same time, it becomes very difficult and divorce sounds like an answer to the problems.
Divorce can be caused by problems such as drugs, adultery, abuse, and money. The United States is a fast-paced country with little to no time to spend on the basic family values it was founded upon. Jobs are more demanding, kids are spending most of their time with people other than their parents, and the economy drains marriages by causing worry and stress. The foundation upon which marriage was built has been shaken.
Children of divorced parents may have a lower sense of psychological well-being than children who grew up with intact families the range of feelings that a child may encounter include: disbelief and denial, sadness, loss, loneliness, depression, anger, anxiety, fear, relief, and hope. Some children may experience long-lasting emotional effects into their adulthood that damage their ability to preserve relationships. The result of parental divorce shapes children emotionally and may impact self-esteem, future relationships, dating and marriage (Armando Loomis and Booth 895+)..
Is it the modernized way of thinking, not finding the ones true love, or is it just the simple fact of “I don’t want to be with you anymore?” Does the problem of divorce go deeper than what appears on the surface? Today in the United States 40 to 50% of marriages fail(Doherty 1). The number of Americans getting a divorce has almost tripled in the past 3 years, so what’s the problem? More importantly what problems can this issue create? Through multiple trial and error research examinations, researchers concluded that parental divorce is associated with multiple problems for youth that extend well into adulthood, and has long lasting effects on their ability to sustain future relationships. So what really causes people to get divorced rather than the pathetic excuse of not being happy? Will there ever be a solution to this ongoing problem, or will America fall deeper and deeper into sin?
Most people, when thinking about divorce, worry about the impact that it has on the children that are involved. Even though children are most likely better off if totally incompatible parents separate instead of staying together, divorce is about loss and change, and it is still hard for children. Everyone knows that divorce has its effects on children. There are three different sources that try to explain these effects. Graham Blaine Jr. states that divorce is a threat to all children, whereas Rhona Mahony states that divorce is not always the cause of behavioral or academic problems in children coming from divorced families. Yvette Walczak and Sheila Burns state that the extent of the damage can be determined by the parents and their methods of explanation to the children.
Divorce is a very common word in today's society. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, "divorce is the legal dissolution of a marriage or a complete or radical severance of closely connected things"(Pickett, 2000). This dissolution of marriage has increased very rapidly in the past fifty years. In 1950 the ratio of divorce to marriage was one in every four; in 1977 that statistic became one in two. Currently one in every two first marriages results in divorce. In second marriages that figure is considerably higher, with a 67% average (National Vital Statistics Report, 2001). One critical aspect of divorce is often not taken into consideration: How it affects children. Every year 1.1 million children are affected by divorce (Benjamin, 2000). Children from divorce or separation often exhibit behavioral and long-term adjustment problems (Kelly, 2000). Throughout this paper I will discuss divorces effects on children at different age levels, how they react, and what can be done to help them.
Married life domesticates but also can cause strain and difficulties. There are new conflicts that arise from people getting married. Often it is the first major decision of one's life and soon there are more bills, more relatives, conflicting plans, children, your spouse might die, and annoying habits that your spouse may have emerge, in most relationships these can all be overcome in time as divorce stats indicate, society is not yet to the point where for every marriage there is a coinciding divorce. "A correlation rises from low incomes, increased uncertainty and fear, and increased personal frustration. These factors put family life under a strain and lead to an increase in child and spouse abuse."1 If these new challenges cannot be overcome then a broken home is the most common result. A broken family can generate in different ways, death, separation, divorce. These are the most common but not all possible reasons for a broken home. There are two ways to observe a break in a family: Husband-wife and Parent- Child. "In addition, less than one-third (31%) of the inmates were married at the time of admission to a correctional facility, compared with almost two-thirds (63%) of adults aged 18 and over in the general population."2
Divorce is a process that many people in America go through. The divorce rate continues to escalate over the years. Divorce is a serious problem, it is a gradual process that ultimately results in families breaking up. There are various factors in which a marriage can fail and end up in divorce. Some skip the step of trying to reconcile things and make it work. In some cases it is easy for a divorce to take place. For instance, in cases where both parties are in agreement and have no children it is easier to handle a divorce. But in the cases where children are present, what happens to the kids? Both parents are at each others throats or one is devastated from the rejection, what role does the child play? It is a hard thing to cope with as an adult imagine as a little one or even a teenager, it affects them in more ways than anyone can imagine. It can affect them both physically and emotionally. The effects of divorce are immense, it permanently weakens the bond or relationship between a child and his parents. Can lead to them reaching out or looking to others for attention, causing poor attitudes, low self esteem, dropping grades, loss of virginity, use of drugs and or weapons, or in some cases mutilation of the body. There are various effects that children have to deal with that maybe extremely hard to cope with. One parent may say one thing yet the other disagrees and makes it impossible for the child to have a stable relationship with both of them. Children need both biological parents at their side to be guardians and counselors in their lives, to be examples of what they need to do to become outstanding citizens in our community.
It is unfortunate that marriages sometimes end and there are children caught in the middle of the marriage but it may be worst for the parents to stay together simply for the children’s sake. However when parents do divorce the children are the most effected by the divorce. Often enough the divorce causes children to feel displaced and also to have feelings that their world is coming to an end. These children tend to grow into adults with either extreme emotional detachment and self-esteem issues or they will have strong family values and try to prevent the cycle from repeating itself but the majority of these children grow up suffering from the divorce.
American Journalist, Helen Rowland said, “ When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn’t a sign that they don’t understand each other, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to” (1). Divorce means the ending of a marriage by legal separation, thus, a couple that were once bonded together have now separated for opposing reasons. Divorce has hurt and destroyed many families across the world and can cause a lot of negativity. Teens often do not know how to deal with the fact that their family is no longer whole and they will transition into a depression. Teens may experience emotional damage by seeing the two most important people in their lives fight constantly. There is a good side and a bad side to seeing parents go through a divorce as a teen. Quite often teens tend to see that, since they are so unhappy, that it is better for them to separate because they do not want to see their parents get hurt. Even when separated, they learn to communicate and bond between one another. The negative side of divorce is that families sometimes stay torn apart, therefore: There is a lot of anger, rage that happens because going through a situation like this is not something that is easy, and many emotions become involved. Dealing with their parents can be difficult for some teens, but for many others, they feel as if a divorce will make their family happier without seeing all of the fighting.
A divorce is defined as “a judicial declaration dissolving a marriage in whole or part, especially on that releases the marriage partners from all matrimonial obligations” as stated by www.dictionary.com/browse/divorce. In current society divorces has been a well-known phenomenon and is quite common t everyone. Couples are getting divorced die to many reasons. Some of them are, but not limited to other love affairs, loss of romantic feelings, infidelity, getting married to young or even conflicts in the home between the two spouses. It is a heavy concept that impacts child(ren) and family one way or the other, both advantageous and negatively.
Nowadays, its significance is greatly overlooked by couples who hastily decide to get married. Often when lovebirds rush into marriage, they find themselves rushing out, filing for a divorce shortly afterwards. These hasty decisions irresponsibly factor into why America has the highest divorce rate in the world. Divorce is especially worse when you 're a parent because while it concludes a failing marriage, it mostly has negative effects on the children. Many divorced parents nearly set their children up for failure by raising them in a clearly dysfunctional environment. Coping with their parent 's divorce causes unnecessary stress, depression and anxiety. They are forced to choose which parent to live with and this decision ultimately puts a strain on their relationship with the other parent. If either parent decides to remarry, adjusting to a new life with a step-family becomes rather difficult. Children must reluctantly welcome new family members when they were already accustomed to their own. This transition forces an irrational and emotional mentality upon the children. They begin to blame themselves for the unhappiness and separation of their parents and constantly seek reassurance to know that they were not. These trying effects haunt children of divorce into adulthood where they struggle to form their own meaningful relationships. Examples include trust issues, fearing divorce themselves, or avoiding serious relationships
Relationships are all about give and take, and to maintain that balance people must be willing to do the work. Today dissolution of marriage is being used as the easy way out when couples no longer agree. When couples are incapable of maintaining a happy marriage, a divorce can be agreed upon. Divorce is more common nowadays, making the divorce rate a continual increase. About 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce (Kazdin). In America, there is one divorce every 13 seconds. That’s 6,646 divorces per day, and 46,523 divorce per week (Irvin). The three main causes of divorce is the lack of communication, financial difficulties, and infidelity.