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In the article “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love”, which was written by Raymond Carver in 1981, the author is mainly talking about the story from Mel McGinnis, who is at home with his wife Terri and their friends, Nick and Laura, are drinking gin and tonics and talking about love.
The first discussion is about Terri's ex husband, Ed. Ed is the guy she was with before Mel McGinnis. It is a sad story. She says, that night Ed beat her, he told her, "I love you, I love you, you bitch" while he pulled her around the room. Terri considers that what Ed felt for her was love. And then Terri continues with her story. He stalks Mel and Terri, at that time Mel was divorcing his ex wife and living together with Terri. It’s a really complicated situation. Ed gains knowledge of the true and kills himself with rat poison, but it doesn’t work well at first, finally he kills himself by shooting himself in his mouth. She feels scared during this time, however, she still thinks Ed loves her because he died for love. On the contrary, Mel points out that there is no relationship between love and killing himself and nobody know why he kills himself. The story of Ed is ends and the conversation move on to Laura and Nick’s story. They think they know what love is. Terri tells them to stop the sappy newlywed love, since the honeymoon is going to be over soon.
Let’s turn to Mel’s story. He gives a story of what happened in the hospital to show what true love is. A couple months ago, an old couple who had been in a car accident came into the hospital, Of course, they survived, but the man was badly injured. He is unable to turn his head after car accident, he feels so unhappy, because he will never look at his wife again, who is just beside him....
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... depression may seem no different from ordinary people, but they often feel lonely and depressed. Manic patients are more impulsive and often breaking things, being violent, sometimes might hurt other people. The reason of causing mental illness may be because of genes- internal factors, such as people inherit from their family. In other words, it happened before in this family. Or external factors, long-term pressure or abrupt event, such as natural disasters and accident, and other psychological factors that lead patients to have mental problem.
In conclusion, there are serial reasons that can explain why people misbehave at times. Problem always appears to be easier than that supposes to be. People should not easily make a conclusion through the appearance. We should take the problem into deep consideration, and then find the true answers to address the problem.
Ed...well, he was born and raised in Plainfield. His daddy ran a farm just a few miles outside town. It wasn't long before his daddy up and died–left Ed and his brother alone with that crazy ass momma of their's. That woman was nuts. She went around tellin' them boys that all women was evil. She'd beat'em if they even thought ‘bout courting. When his momma died Ed was near on to thirty years old and still living in his momma's house. He finally took a liking to some gals in town. I guess it was finally safe to talk to ‘em.
Goodwin, F.K., and Jamison, K.R. (1990). Manic Depressive Illness. New York: Oxford University Press. Goodwin, Donald W. and Guze, Samuel B. (1989). Psychiatric
Bipolar disorder, also known as manic depression, is a psychopathology that affects approximately 1% of the population. (1) Unlike unipolar disorder, also known as major affective disorder or depression, bipolar disorder is characterized by vacillating between periods of elation (either mania or hypomania) and depression. (1, 2) Bipolar disorder is also not an illness that remedies itself over time; people affected with manic depression are manic-depressives for their entire lives. (2, 3) For this reason, researchers have been struggling to, first, more quickly diagnose the onset of bipolar disorder in a patient and, second, to more effectively treat it. (4) As more and more studies have been performed on this disease, the peculiar occurrence between extreme creativity and manic depression have been uncovered, leaving scientists to deal with yet another puzzling aspect of the psychopathology. (5)
Psychologically, mania is described as a mood disorder characterized by euphoric states ,extreme physical activity ,excessive talkativeness, distractedness, and sometimes grandiosity. During manic periods a person becomes "high" extremely active , excessively talkative, and easily distracted. During these periods the affected person's self esteem is also often greatly inflated. These people often become aggressive and hostile to others as their self confidence becomes more and more inflated and exaggerated. In extreme cases (like Hamlet's) the manic person may become consistently wild or violent until he or she reaches the point of exhaustion. Manic depressives often function on little or no sleep during their episodes.
The characters Ed and Emily are both disturbed people who cannot bear to lose the person they love. In conclusion to losing their loved ones they decide upon murder, although Ed does not kill his ex Terri he does threaten to do so. Emily murders her lover to keep him from ever leaving her side. Ed threatens to kill his ex in order to scare her into staying, but when that does not work he kills himself, not being able to live without her. Both characters show signs of possibly having mental illness or just simply being unstable. One example of this is in “A Rose For Emily”, in paragraphs 26-28 it talk about how Emily would not let the town’s people bury her father. It says, “She told them that her father was not dead” (406). Emily was clearly not capable of dealing with the death of her father, she did not want to let him go. Another example of how the characters display being unstable is in, “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love”. In this short story is says, “Terri said the man she lived with before Mel loved her so much he tried to kill her. Then Terri said, ‘He beat me up one night. He dragged me around the living room by my ankles. He kept saying, ‘I love you, I love you, you bitch’” (411) The characters from both of the short stories showed signs of how they were incapable of dealing with
This is somewhat characteristic of the 1920's. During this time, many people partied, drank, and had a careless attitude. Neither of these couples experienced a pure relationship, only ones filled with lies and selfishness, not of true, honest love.
Mental illness can be a mixture of different factors. You can get mental illness through genetics meaning that it is passed down within the family. That can only happen if the mental illness is heredity. Another factor of mental illness is psychological trauma. Psychological trauma like abuse, or loss can cause some mental illnesses. When mental illness is untreated it makes it difficult for the person to function in society and deal with everyday life. The different types of mental illnesses range from anxiety disorders to personality disorders. Other mental illnesses are mood disorders, eating disorders, psychotic disorders, and impulse control and addiction disorders. An example psychotic disorder schizophrenia. Examples of eating disorders are bulimia and anorexia. According to MedicineNet.com “Most mental illnesses are caused by a combination of factors and cannot be prevented”. Mental illness is something that should not be avoided. The biggest issue when it comes to mental illness that is noticeable is when someone who has a mental il...
Terri, Mel's wife, was once married to an abusive man, who '...went on dragging me (Terri) around the living room. My head kept knocking on things.... What do you do with love like that?.... People are different, Mel. Sure, sometimes he may have acted crazy. Okay. But he loved me. In his own way maybe, but he loved me.'; (pp 110-111) To the reader, it seems hard to believe that there could be love in a relationship where one partner physically abuses the other. However, in Terri's case, both Terri and her ex-husband felt that they were in love. This coincides with the author's theme that early on in a r...
love, is shown by an elderly couple involved in a bad accident. Both of them
After analyzing Raymond Carver’s “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love,” it is easy to see that there are several different ideas concerning true love that the characters in the story are in dispute over. Terri’s idea of real love is the most valid out of the group at the table. All of the members of the group are rather confused as to what real love is. Terri is included as one of the confused. However, I believe that she is the closest to understanding what love is. A key piece of evidence demonstrating her understanding of love is her remark to Laura and Nick. She scolds the couple for basing their relationship on physical aspects, rather than emotion or passion. Terri, like the rest of the party, is on her second marriage. Her first husband was an abusive man that beat her, and even dragged her by her ankles around their living room. Terri’s current husband, Mel, is a cardiologist that believes in spiritual love, and that between spouses, people are barren and hollow inside, and that he could be married to any other empty person without difference. Mel is rather shielded from emotion between spouses. His only real love lies with his children, unfortunately Mel allows his conflict with his ex wife to block him from calling his them. Terri does love Mel, but she reminisces about her time with Ed. Terri realizes that Ed was full of emotion, and that he was just befuddled and chaotic in his methods of sharing his feelings....
A person suffering from bipolar disorder alternates from manic states to those of depression. These emotional states can alternate cyclically or one mood may dominate over the other. It is also possible for the two to be mixed or combined with each other.
Bipolar disorder, also called manic depression disorder/illness can be defined in many ways. One definition is a mood disorder in which a person swings back and forth between wild euphoria and frenetic bursts of energy (the manic phase) to such deep, dark, and overwhelming depression that a person may contemplate or attempt suicide. (Hirshkowitz & Smith, 2004, p. 107) This illness/disorder seems to affect both men and women in about equal numbers and can get increasingly worse if left undiagnosed or even untreated.
I chose the topic of Mood Disorders to research for many reasons. I'm always hearing phrases such as "They're manic depressant" and many more which interest me to research about these disorders. Mood disorders are broken down into two general categories, depression and bipolar disorder. When researching mood disorders, I've realized the meaning of all these phrases I've heard.
Bipolar Disorder is a complex psychological disorder, a mental illness also known as manic depression. In Margarita Tartakovsky’s article “Bipolar Disorder Fact Sheet” she states “Approximately 2.6 percent of American adults have bipolar disorder.” People who are affected by this condition experience brutal mood swings that could impair their daily activities and have a negative effect on their lives and relationships. It can cause the individuals to make very poor decisions and even lead to drug and alcohol abuse. They experience high and low mood changes which can be very exhausting not only to the person with the condition, but there family and loved ones as well. When one is experiencing a “high” in mood, they can feel like they are invincible. They become very self-confident and feel like they can do anything, which can lead to overspending, reckless thinking, and bad decision making. When experiencing a “low,” the individual becomes very depressed, sad, and even feels hopeless. According to Tartakovsky, “suicide attempts are very common in bipolar disorder, especially during depressive episodes.” There are several types of bipolar disorders, but the two main types are Bipolar I and Bipolar II. Bipolar I is the definitive type of the bipolar disorder, and the person will constantly go through both the manic and depressive stages of the condition. The length of these episodes will differ from time to time. In Bipolar II, the manic stages are not as severe as Bipolar I; nevertheless, the depressive stages are quite similar (bipolar). But what causes this life altering mental illness? Several factors contribute to the cause of bipolar disorder such as genetics, biology, and environment.
Ninety percent of Americans marry by the time that they are fifty; however, forty to fifty percent of marriages end in divorce ("Marriage and Divorce"). Love and marriage are said to go hand in hand, so why does true love not persist? True, whole-hearted, and long-lasting love is as difficult to find as a black cat in a coal cellar. Loveless marriages are more common than ever, and the divorce rate reflects this. The forms of love seen between these many marriages is often fleeting. Raymond Carver explores these many forms of love, how they create happiness, sadness, and anything in between, and how they contrast from true love, through his characters in "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love". Four couples are presented: Mel and Terri, Nick and Laura, Ed and Terri, and, most importantly, an unnamed elderly couple; each couple exhibits a variation on the word love.