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The effects of gender on communication
The effects of gender on communication
Gender differences in communication
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This section describes differences between speech of men and women. Those differences are discussed point by point as the followings: Rapport Talk Versus Report Talk One of the most marked differences in language usage between men and women is purpose of talk. Tannen (1991) noted that women use talk to establish connections and maintain relationships. In other words, they seek for interdependence. In addition, women are likely to show similarity and match their experience with each other. On the other hand, men use talk to preserve their independence and maintain status. To achieve this, men use conversation to establish their knowledge and skill. They also hold centre stage by telling stories, joking or conveying information. For example, …show more content…
They, moreover, utilize question forms to acquire more understanding about their friend’s feeling. Unlike women, men use talk to sustain their status. Men often view conversation as a contest. They use conversation not only to achieve status among others but also to prevent others from dominating them. In addition, they will not ask for any help or information from anybody because it shows their lower status (Tannen, …show more content…
Women tend to use tentative language to keep conversation open and to allow others to convey different ideas. Women produce tentativeness in a number of forms, including verbal hedges, qualifying terms, and tag questions. They might say ‘I think’, ‘I feel’, ‘well’, or ‘I am not probably the best judge of this, but …..’ and so forth to soften the strength of their utterances. On the other hand, male’s speech is assertive. They use language in a forceful, direct and authoritative way. Men do not use tentative devices as frequently as women do and try to avoid using tentative devices because it reflects powerlessness and inferiority of the speaker (Wood,
Deborah Tannen has achieved scholarly and public praise for her conclusions about how women and men differ in conversational styles. You Just Don’t Understand[6] clarifies stylistic differences in how the two sexes communicate with each other.
Steven Pinker distinguishes the difference between talking to man and women. Pinker showed a lady that was comfortable talking to another lady and the lady became angry when her talking to a man, not women (Pinker 2007 .p112, 113). People used intricacies method to achieve their needs and emotion instead of saying what they need to say directly. (Pinker 2007 .p113) Furthermore, even in a sexual situation, people twist and turn around and turn around their words. For example, “would you like to come up and see my etching?” (Pinker 2007.p113) Moreover, people use a kind word to order something from someone else without making a demand to the receiver or using indirect speeches to avoid a problem that may happen by mistake. (Pinker, 2007
In the introduction of Deborah Tannen’s “Conversation Style: Talking on the Job”, she compares and contrasts the ways men and women communicate. This reminds me of what I tell people that are struggling in their relationships. Women and men express themselves differently. Women think, but men act. If you can’t wrap your head around this, being in a relationship with anyone is going to be hard. Yet, this is such a basic way of looking at this issue. Not only are the genders vastly different, but each person relates to the world around them in a certain way. He or she also needs to be related to in a specific way. Looking at personalities and personal histories can give a better look at the way we communicate with each other. Tannen examines
In recent years, gender differences have already been one of the most controversial issues in various research. As an important communication tool of mankind, language is inevitably involved in controversies. However, Rachel Rafelman, a Canadian journalist and the author of “The Party Line” express her thought and opinion in her essay. She not only have some great points on what and how women and men are likely to talk, but also have different points on the talking environment. She comes up with facts and fit real and particle examples in her essay to make it understood. Whereas, Ronald Macaulay, a professor of linguistics and the author of “Sex Difference” uses words of novels to argue and promotes them as a cause of reinforce to men’s and women’s stereotypes in his essay. He argues through his whole as rebuttal and gives some examples to oppose the preconceived notion of sex differences. Over all, both Rafelman and Macaulay are the good writer but Rafelman is having upper to prove her essay better organized using her tones as per requirement.
In a marriage women are the ones that look for a good male counterpart to communicate with, and if the husband is not into communication it can lead to divorce. This was proven in research stated in the article by Deborah Tannen “Most women want their husbands to be first and foremost conversational partners” (101). For example in Catherine Kohler’s research it is stated that “Few of the men gave lack as communication as the reason for their divorces” (102). This proves that men don’t find the need to be a good communicator. Women always get mad at the men for not being that good of conversationalist but, are the men really to blame. If men find communication as important as women they would communicate better. Many men believe that women lowered their expectations for the men they wouldn’t be as disappointed. Women need to accept the fact that men aren’t very good communicators. In the article lack of com...
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
The article “Women Talk Too Much” by Janet Homes is about whether or not women talk more than men; Holmes argued that males talk more than females in general, but the debate will continue in this topic for a long time. Holmes starts by asking the question “do women talk more that men?” the author shared sayings from different cultures about women talking too much, after that she go into her discussion. The purpose of the article was clearly to convince the reader that the title is 100% wrong. Homes uses statistics, researches and seminars to support her claim. The article was persuasive as she did a great job in presenting it very well, as she stated her claims early in the article.
Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of men and women. Tannen observed that, "For males, conversation is the way you negotiate your status in the group and keep people from pushing you around; you use talk to preserve your independence. Females, on the other hand, use conversation to negotiate closeness and intimacy; talk is the essence of intimacy, so being best friends means sitting and talking. For boys, activities, doing things together, are central. Just sitting and talking is not an essential part of friendship. They're friends with the boys they do things with" (Tannen 95).
Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks that men and women share. These networks also differ and as do the reasonings for their formation. Although we do not think that men and women need to change their cultures to effectively communicate, we do think that better communication is possible. One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments. Intimacy threatens this independence, so men have a tendency to avoid it. One of the old sayings about women is that they talk more than men. It turns out that it is not necessarily true. Women seem to talk more in private conversations than do men. Women do not generally have a fear of intimacy and therefore are much more open with one another during private conversations. It is more difficult for women to use this type of communication style in the public arena. In that case it is men that do most of the talking. Tannen ultimately argues that men use communication as a weapon. They use long explanations to command attention from who it is they are speaking to. They use it to convey information and to ultimately gain agreement. Tannen suggests that through even simple conversation men are continually protecting their status. She sugg...
Lieberman, Simma. “Differences in Male and Female Communication Styles” Simma Lieberman Associates (undated). Retrieved February 25, 2010<
...or a relationship”. In genderlects, there is no superior or inferior method of communication, but rather, men and women just communicate differently. By understanding these differences, one can reduce the amount of misunderstandings in future conversations.
After reading the different studies and research in the chapter I have a much different view than before. I reflected on my whole life and noticed that when I am in a more private and relaxed setting my wife usually does a lot of the talking. But in more formal settings like when we attend seminars together or when we took a college class together, I am doing more of the talking. This is just one example of how this study actually reflects my everyday life. Another example of how this chapter changed my view is the way male and female speech occurs in my class. I was really taken back from my teaching and I noticed that this is true of my classroom and I didn 't even know this! Many times when a girl answers a question or tries to provide her different insight of the question provided I sense that many feel she is trying to show off. This chapter honestly will helped me get rid of many assumptions I 've always had. I will also try to ensure all my students have the social confidence in my classroom and try to help all students contribute to the
Applying to the analysis of linguistic elements in men and women speech, psychologists suggests that speech style of them differs from each other because status and connection are not necessarily conscious primary goals but are inherent in all of us (Lyons). Throughout our lives, men and women place more emphasis on different things to achieve their goals. For women, greater value is placed on building a connection and rapport by doing things such as speaking in small groups, actively listening, stopping at the petrol station to ask for directions and avoiding conflicts. For men weight is placed on being independent and maintaining status up, and competition. We learn these behaviors when we are young and carry these attitudes and lessons into adulthood.
How does language affect our interaction with other genders? Language is the basis of all interaction. The language we use is essential to other’s perceptions of us. We instinctively know this, so we cater our language to suit how we want to be perceived by others. Language is not the only factor in perception though. Other’s interpretation of our language is as important an ingredient in their perception of us as the language we use is. Our perceptions of each other, more than anything else dictate our interactions with each other. The essential question is does interpretation of language vary between genders?
The book An Intorduction of Sociolinguistics is an outstanding introductary book in the field of sociolinguistics. It encompasses a wide range of language issues. In chapter 13, Wardhaugh provides a good insight to the relationship between language and gender. He explains gender differences of language-in-use with concise examples. Wardhaugh riases questions about sexist language and guides readers to look closer at how people use language differently because of their own gender in daily life. According to the Whorfian hypothesis, which indicates that the way people use language reflects their thoughts, different genders adapt different communication strategies.