Brendon Sischy: A Short Story

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It all started when our antagonizing protagonist, Brendon Sischy, woke up in a secret vineyard. It was the fifth time it had happened. Feeling abundantly relieved, Brendon Sischy groped a carrot, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Giggling like schoolgirl, he realized that his beloved Phone was missing! Immediately he called his lover, Jared Wagman. Brendon Sischy had known Jared Wagman for (plus or minus) 200,000 years, the majority of which were enticing ones. Jared Wagman was unique. He was smart though sometimes a little... annoying. Brendon Sischy called him anyway, for the situation was urgent. Jared Wagman picked up to a very mad Brendon Sischy. Jared Wagman calmly assured him that most man-eating capybaras grimace before mating, yet legless puppies usually wildly yawn *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Brendon Sischy. Why was Jared Wagman trying to distract Brendon Sischy? Because he had snuck out from Brendon Sischy's with the Phone only two days prior. It was a sassy little Phone... how could he resist? It didn't take long before Brendon Sischy got back to …show more content…

Like a drunken sailor at happy hour, Jared wagman groped sassily in Brendon Sischy's direction, clearly desperate. Brendon Sischy grabbed the Phone and bolted for the door. It was locked. Jared wagman let out a enticing chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Brendon Sischy,' he rebuked. Jared wagman always had been a little abrasive, so Brendon Sischy knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Jared wagman did something crazy, like... start chucking dangerous oil-soaked rags at him or something. In a blinding moment of misguided bravado, he gripped his Phone tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass

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