Birth Order: The Similarities Of Middle Childhood Children

I have grown up within a familiy of four sibling. Those siblings are myself, Brianna, Haley, and Colby. There have been many noticeable differences. There have also been many interesting similarities. Some, scary while others, suprisingly pleasant. One of the scarier similarities is how my youngest sister, Haley, seems to act a lot like me. As I have looked at the evolution of each family member's personality, I have come to realize that no matter how close we are to each other, we all seem to have our differences. This is just one of many examples that has spurrned my interest in the effects of birth order. While investgatng birth order effects, something has surfaced in my mind time after time. Birth order affects people's behavior in many

ways. I have seen myself be controlling and wanting approval from my parents to my little brother Colby, who can be aggressive and angry for seemingly no reason at all. My parents also seem to have their differences between each other. Mom is the one who is more gentle and will have sympathy, whereas dad is more demanding and expects people to do as he says.
Out of everything that I have noticed with my family is that while Haley will act a lot like me, Colby will act a lot like Brianna. Before I started this reaserch, I didn't know if this was caused by the actual order we were born in or if the six to seven year gap caused it. While Brianna and Colby act like they are always inferior and not adequate enough for Mom and Dad, Haley and I have found ourselves to be more focused on what may lie ahead and we will often break down if something goes wrong about our plans that we made.
According to "The birth order effect" (2012), Alfred Adler, who is an Austrian psycologist, was the first person to set out the importance of birth order. Even though the birth order isn't exact with our personalities, it does give us a lot of clues to how it affects us (Birth order, 2014a). According to Birth order dynamics and response to stress (1998), the order you were born in can be a likely predictor of the relationships that you may have with your parents and and children which then causes your personality to develop substance. Parents tend to unconciously relate to whatever child that was born in the same place as them regarding birth order (Roff, 2014). Every child has their pros and cons in the birth order rank. Based on where he or she is placed in the family, each child is different and will have different personalities (Birth order, 2014c). Even if an individual has a sibling, he or she probably didn't share the same parent because that person's parents more than likely treated him or her differently. Each sibling also takes on different roles from everyone else (Gross, 2013). So, when looking at birth order, one must consider everything that goes ino it (Walcutt, 2009).
According to Birth order (2014b), the second-born can be treated as a first-born if they are the first of their gender. The parents of a first-born child will take notice of everything that he or she does and will make sure that they have the finest everything (T.). In "The birth order effect" (2012), an Alderian trained parenting expert named Michael Grose explains how first-borns are always seeking approval because of the attention that Mom and Dad showered them with. In fact, the first-born will likely take on a leadership role. He or she may take on a leadership role because they think that they are the oldest (Whitebourne, 2013). According to Neal (2002), over half of all the US presidents have been first-born children. This is because first-born's are natural leaders. First-born children also enjoy being the center of attention for usually around four years. Then another baby comes into the family and the first-born child is forced to share the spotlight (Blair, 2011). As a result, the first-born will feel dethroned because of the loss of attention from everyone (Whitebourne, 2013). There are also many ways in which a first-born may be negatively affected. One example is how they my feel less important when they lose the attention of their parents take care of the next baby (T.). Despite that, the first child will have a higher chance of going to college than any other child in that family (Walcutt, 2009). The first-born may even attempt to be a mediator when they are younger, and this in turn will cause he or she ot be aggressive with their feelings (T.). The more that a first-born may do to climb the status totem pole, the more that they will be grouped as the typical first-born (R.). According to Varma (2013), when the mother gets pregenant for the first time, her placentus may not work as well causing first-borns to have a higher risk for blood pressure. First-borns are also usually more anxious because of their ability to be really sensitive to other people's mood (Blair, 2011).
Now that the general information about being a first-born has been covered, it is time to move on to some general information about the middle-borns.

There are certain differences between the middle child of a family of three and the middle child of a large family The middle child in a family of three will feel more competitive because they recieved more attention and may not have learned how to communicate effectively to get what they want (Birth order, 2014c). According to Gross (2013), Middle child personalities will differ from the first-borns because he or she was born after and because he/she will never excel at the same things. Also, middle children are the most loyal friends you will ever meet. This is because they feel left out of the family (Varma, 2013). According to Birth order (2014c), The middle child has a list of different personalities. One of these is that they will try to bully other sibling so that they will feel the power they were missing out on. Middle children's behavior often can become more geared toward people pleasing because parents have loosened their iron fist of control and are not as concerned over he/she when he/she injurs him or her self (Voo, 2014). According to Birth order (2014b), some middle born children become lawyers to help fight some of the social injustice that they felt as children. Because they were often in the middle when older and younger sibling quarrled, middle-borns tend to become more diplomatic than first-borns.

(Blair, 2011). The strengths of the middle children may vary from child to child. The second-born may be good at being consistent and paying very close attention to details, Whereas the next child may have a bigger heart for compassion (Birth order plus - intro to birth order, n.d.). Middle children also tend to become more relaxed and very friendly ("The birth order effect", 2012).
Now on to last-borns. According to Gross (2013), the youngest child can share common traits with the oldest child. Last-born children sometimes will wrestle the spotlight from others because they are self centered and they seek attention (Voo, 2014). But last-borns may go opposite ways than the rest of the family ("The birth order effect", 2012). According to Birth order (2014b), last-borns sometimes can develop very good skills socially and how they cope with things. He or she may also act similarly to an only child because they feel smaller than everyone else. The last-born will also feel a sense of security because they have a family who will support them both physically and mentally (Gross, 2013).
According to Whitebourne (2013), the only child will have a balance of getting all the attention and feeling like his or her parents are trying to control their every move. Also, children with no siblings are more prone to being afraid of disorder because they usually had an adult around to help them sort things out (Blair, 2011). The only child may also rely on help from others rather than rely on their own ablities and efforts (Birth order, 2014b). Only children may become very critical of themselves and allow that to spillover into helping others (Birth order, 2014b). According to Birth order dynamics and response to stress (1998), only children don't have very good interpersonal skills and that in turn can have less satisfying relationships with everyone. He or she may be spoiled but at the same time feel incompetant because the adults are more capable than him or her. He or she may also have the feeling that they finally made it through life when they become adults. This is from a side effect of being around adults all the time. The only child will probably feel as if he or she is treated unfairly when he or she cannot seem to get their way. As a result, he or she may become uncooperative (Birth order, 2014b).
First-borns are especially prone to parents. In a book written by Leman, you should take the first-born out for special outings and other such things so that he or she may feel approval (Varma, 2013). According to Blair (2011), first-borns tend to obey the law, in his or her efforts to please those who rule our lives. He or she are also likely to be conservative. “You're (first-born) a good student: you do your homework and generally accept what authority figures tell you. Primarily, you're driven by the desire to please your parents and teachers.” (p. 3).
According to Blair (2011), Middle-born kids often find themselves finding innovative ways to get attention from their parents by dressing differently and wearing weird hair styles. Last-borns will turn to attention grabing behaviors to be noticed.
According to Birth order dynamics and response to stress (1998), a psycologist at the University of Georgia laid out the difference between the actual and psycological order of birth. Sometimes, parents can determine how certain children act. The youngest child will feel as if they don't have as much experience. This is because the youngest may be pampered by parents (Whitebourne, 2013). According to Birth order dynamics and response to stress (1998), In some cases, a strong assertive second-born may be able to over power the slower first-born. When this happens, the second and first born will then switch how they think of themselves. Middle-borns are usually defined by the way they focus on the competition and on not having as many resources at their expsoal (Whitebourne, 2013).
First-borns sometimes will keep their traits as they grow older. Take the case of Tracy Rackauskas who is 35 years old and still wants to achieve at everything she does (Voo, 2014). According to Voo (2014), as middle children grow up, they will sometimes keep their rebellious attitude. In fact, Michael Grose claims that he recently met up with a patient and found that everything from her youth of playing catch up with her sister spilled over into her adult life ("The birth order effect", 2012). When the last-born grows up, they can often be laid back and have a view that everything will work out. The only child will more than likely become a perfectionest (Voo, 2014).
Now on to some general info on sibling rivalry. According to Birth order (2014b), Siblings will become jealous at the love that is displayed towards other children. Physical fighting is the most stressful form of physical fighting.
“There are a number of ways to ease the unavoidable jealously whose lives have been disrupted by the arrival of a younger sibling.

When friends or relatives visit to see the new baby, parents can make the older child feel better by cuddling him or giving him special attention, including a small present to offset the gifts received by the baby. The older child's self-esteem can be bolstered by involving him in the care of the newborn in modest ways, such as helping out whemn the baby is being diapered or dressed or helping push the stroller. The older child should be made to feel proud of the achievements and responsibilities that go along with his more advanced age- things the new baby cannot do yet because he or she is too young. Another way to make older children feel loved and appreciated is to set aside some quality time to spend alone with each of them on a regularbasis. It is also important for parents to avoid overtly comparing their children to each other, and every effort should be made to avoid

favoritsm.”
Now it is time to go over some relationship facts that cooralate with birth order. According to Schipani (2014), When you pair two oldest siblings with eachother, you get a power struggle in which the two partners may clash frequently. Cliff Isacson believes that two third-borns will get along very well with eachother, whereas two first-borns will not have a happy relationship ("The birth order effect"s, 2012). First-borns are usually the dominant ones in relationships whereas the last-born is less responsible. One example of how the first-born can be dominant is that when a first and middle-born are paired, one will get a happy relationship with a danger. That danger is that the middle child will form themselves to whatever the first-born is doing (Schipani, 2014).
According to Birth order plus- intro to birth order (n.d.), The first-born will probably be more cautious when driving because they feel that everyone may be out to get them. The only child will expect everyone else to drive perfectly while he or she drives as if he or she is sure of themselves.
It is now time to look at the inveitable topic of birth order and homosexuality. A study in 2006 revealed that for every male born in a family, the chance that the next male will be gay is raised by a third ((Sieczkowski, 2013). This rising chance of someone being homosexual can only be explaiend if we are to assume that the mother's body is able to develop defenses that won't allow a male to completely turn from being a female (Sulloway, 1999). The 2006 study did not show any evidence of a special mechansim that affects the womb in a way that raises the chance of a male being gay. However, scientists are now starting to focus in on the idea of a mechanism and are searching for any signs of change within the mother's womb (Sieczkowski, 2013). However, according to Sulloway (1999), the females in a family have not been affected by the same rising probablity as males for chance of being born a homosexual.