Antonio Juan Marez Luna

Should religion make you choose who you are? "You have to choose, Antonio," Cico said, "you have to choose between the god of the church, or the beauty that is here and now." Antonio Juan Marez Luna was born to believe in a higher power. Something that is good, but will spite you for sinning. What is a sin? He begins to question everything good and evil in the world; right and bad. Tony doesn’t know who he is, or how to be a good son. His mother wants him to be a priest and make the Luna family proud. To hold onto his innocence for as long as possible. His father wants the boy to ride with the free spirit of the Illano underneath his wings. Right away and for more than half of the book the right choice seemed to be simple. Be a priest; follow

Growing up was a huge theme. He lost his innocence and found out that the people of the world could be ugly. Going to school and starting catechism was exciting and new, but also foreboding, “‘Ay, how true,’ my mother said and clutched me tightly, ‘and what a sin it is for a boy to grow into a man--’” His mother believed it was a sin for a sweet innocent child like Tony to grow up and be tainted. That fear of hers could’ve been why she wanted Tony to become a priest. He could be a holy man, but the priest completely contradicts what his mother has said, “You are innocent until you understand, the priest of the church said, and you will understand good and evil when the communion is placed in your mouth and God fills your body.” If to lose your innocent was such a sin in a mother’s eyes and to become a priest you have to lose your innocence, then everything contradicts itself? "But it's not fair to those who don't sin!" I countered. "Tony," Cico said softly, "all men sin."

I had no answer to that. My own mother had said that losing your innocence and becoming a man was learning to sin. I felt weak and powerless in the knowledge of the impending doom.” Imagine how stressful it would be to try and stay as your mother’s little boy forever; all while trying to please her by becoming a holy man that is supposed to serve the people of the