The Main Problems of My Friend Ken

Ken is my friend. However, he does not smile and always be alone. He becomes silent and alone. After my understanding, there are three main problems about Ken. First, he has a negative emotion on his others classmates had similar results and all managed to get into University. Second, he lacks communications with his family. Third, he has a negative communication style on meeting friends. Here I will elaborate on them and give some possible suggestions to give a hand to Ken.

The first problem, which is that Ken feels discontented and unfair on his others classmates had similar results and all managed to get into University. He did not accept this result. According to the Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (Ellis, 1984), it just ‘beliefs’ cause emotion, not the ‘activating event’. The activating event of Ken is that his others classmates had similar results and all managed to get into University but he did not. And his beliefs is that it is not fair to him. Finally, the consequence of him is feeling discontented and unhappy.

Therefore, the only way to change his pessimistic feelings which make a change on his beliefs first. There is an old saying, ‘All road lead to Rome’. If he has this belief and move on, his consequence will have a change also. This will let him feel positive. He will get back his confidence and power if he can think optimistically on his result. And also, according to the Control Theory (Glasser, 1984), he can try to do something pleasurable to change his emotion, such as doing some exercises at least 30 minutes or learning something new which he is interested on it. This helps him to relax himself and have a power to face the difficulties in future. Moreover, he should keep a smiling face. In fact, “facial e...

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