Grendel's Journey of Self-Discovery

A monster is a creature that deviates from normal or acceptable behavior; a threatening fore; something of unnatural deformity, malevolence, and cruelty. A hero, on the other hand, is one idealized for courage, bravery, and strength. While fusing the evermore different qualities of both would seem impossible, John Gardner’s Grendel does just that. Gardner creates an ambiguous character that possess aspects of both a monster and a hero – it is a force of evil, yet admired; it causes pain yet urges sympathy; and it is of irregular ugliness yet beloved. Its name is Grendel. Grendel is an illustration of a “shadow stalker” who becomes submissive to its own misunderstanding and isolation, hungering for discovery, and claiming some rightful place in an ambiguous world.

Grendel’s search for self-discovery is explored through his acceptance of insanity found within, while at the same his dismissal of insanity found in others. Grendel’s dismissal of such misunderstanding found in other characters allows him to discover his own insanity in a world he considers absurd. Through discovering his own insanity, Grendel begins to believe that the absurdity of the world is rooted in his own creation. “I understood that the world was nothing: a mechanical chaos of casual, brute enmity on which we stupidly impose our hopes and fears. I understood that, finally and absolutely, I alone exist. All the rest, I saw, is merely what pushes me, or what I push against, blindly – as blindly as all that is not myself pushes back. I create the whole universe, blink by blink” (Gardner 21-22). While Grendel believes that he created the world and all forces revolve around him, he recognizes that he defines himself through his conflict with humans, even in the mi...

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...n and misunderstanding, drawing parallels and undermining one’s hunger for the littlest bit of truth in a world swallowed by absurdity. Grendel is an illustration of a monster whose self-inflicted pain and alienation causes him to lose himself in mystery, and thus prevents him from seeing any truth.

Works Cited

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Gardner, John. Grendel. New York: Knopf, 1971. Print.

Murr, Judy Smith. "John Gardner's Order And Disorder: Grendel And The Sunlight Dialogues."

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Sanchez, Reuben. “‘You Improve Them, My Boy!’: Insanity and Self-Discovery in Gardner’s

Grendel.” Explicator 66.1 (2007): 47-50. Literary Reference Center. Web. 12 Feb. 2014