The Theory of Attachment and Attachment Styles

1031 Words3 Pages

Attachment is the emotional bond between humans, which is based on our relationship with a parent or early caregiver during the years of childhood. There are four different attachment styles – secure, preoccupied, dismissive, and fearful – each describing a different way in which individuals interact with others, approach social and romantic relationships, and deal with life.
Each attachment style is divided along two dimensions – the fear of abandonment and the fear of closeness. Bartholomew and Horowitz define fear of abandonment as the model of self which describes the belief of an individual to be either “worthy of love and support or not” (1991). They also define fear of closeness as the model of other which describes an individual’s belief of others; “other people are [either] seen as trustworthy and available [or] unreliable and rejecting” (Bartholomew, 1991). By combining these two dimensions, we get a model that shows the four types of attachment.
The secure attachment style is characterized by low fear of closeness and low fear of abandonment. Individuals classified as secure are comfortable with intimacy and autonomy. In other words, secure individuals are comfortable depending on others; but they also feel comfortable having others depend on them. Secure individuals feel generally comfortable with themselves and find it relatively easy to get close to others and are not afraid of abandonment or “about someone getting too close to [them]” (Shaver). Whenever these individuals are stressed or are facing a problem, they seek comfort from loved ones.
I would classify myself as secure. I feel comfortable with intimacy and autonomy and usually find it easy to get close to others. I would also describe myself as having a high...

... middle of paper ...

...d behave. Even a week later, she was still upset and did not how to deal with this “failure”.
She also tends to be unpredictable in her mood which can switch from happy to sad in a blink of an eye. Recently we went to a party and she was in a very good mood. But as soon as she got rejected by a guy, she got upset, sad, and started to cry.

Works Cited

Bartholomew, K., & Horowitz, L. (1991). Attachment Styles Among Young Adults; A Test of a Four-Category Model. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61(2), 226-244. Retrieved from http://www.sfu.ca/psyc/faculty/bartholomew/research/publications/bh1991.pdf
Shaver, P., & Brennan, K. (1992). Attachment Styles and the “Big Five” Personality Traits: Their Connections with Each Other and with Romantic Relationship Outcomes. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 18(5), 536-545. doi: 10.1177/0146167292185003

Open Document