Personal Narrative Essay: Secondary Victims Of Domestic Violence

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Domestic Violence: What Kids See

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence defines domestic violence as "the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another. It includes physical violence, sexual violence, psychological violence, and emotional abuse. The frequency and severity of domestic violence can vary dramatically; however, the one constant component of domestic violence is one partner’s consistent efforts to maintain power and control over the other."[1]

When it comes to domestic violence, there are many definitions from a variety of different sources, but, in my professional …show more content…

There are other family members who may not be the target of abuse, but they suffer too. They are called secondary victims

Secondary victims of domestic violence are often children who witness the abuse. Witnessing can mean a variety of things from being present when the abuse occurs, overhearing it from another room, or seeing the after effects. About 275 million kids around the world are exposed to domestic violence each year.[5]

Why it Matters
Parents need to understand what happens to children who witness someone they love subjected to abuse - especially when it involves their parents. Witnessing domestic violence can have serious impacts on the young, developing minds and those impacts can follow kids into adulthood.

The effects of exposure to domestic violence include emotional difficulties, physical and mental health issues, and behavior problems. Children who grow up with domestic violence may have difficulties concentrating, trouble completing school work, and lower scores on measures of verbal, motor, and social skills.

The table below summarizes the possible effects on kids as secondary victims of domestic …show more content…

If you 're experiencing domestic violence, now may be the time to show your children what healthy relationships are and what love is through your actions. Children should not have to grow up keeping this terrible family secret and suffering through its effects. You may think everything 's fine, but it 's not. Kids are forced to carry around pain and anger as they attempt to process the reality of abuse from their point of view.

The bravest and scariest thing any parent can do is to protect their kids when a member of the family is causing serious harm. If you want to end the cycle of abuse, you can do it.

Please Get Help
Asking for help is difficult. It is extremely important for you and your children that you obtain the support and resources you need. You deserve to be safe and so do your children. Remember that when you make a choice to address domestic violence in your family you are showing your children by example that violence is not OK and they can make healthy choices for themselves and future families like you did. The telephone number for the National Domestic Violence Hotline is listed in the references

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